I can't even say hello to people i know

IcarusUnderWater2 · Intermediate User Joined: Mar 15, 2008 Posts: 199

So last term at uni I worked in a group with this girl an her friends. She was really nice and i happened to think she was really hot...

but anyways, she knew all the other people in the group and they were all really friendly and cool but i just sat there at most of the meetings like a lemon... i was totally unable to engage in the conversations about going to party's etc...

Anyway, i happen to see this girl around college and she says hello and stuff even if she is with her friends. But as is always the case in these situations, i feel like a loser and i am either to scared to talk or my voice shoots really high. I normally do this pathetic closed mouth smile, raise my eyebrows and mime the word hey... or sort of whisper it as im walking past.

Today, I went shopping in this other city with my brother and i just happened to see her in this shop as i was window browsing. So i panicked and was like "We have to leave". I was just overwhelmed by the fact that i would have to say hello or make small talk. Anyway i walked away and started walking down an escalator... she came out of the shop and walked right past me, but she didn't look at me. I was hoping she would say hey or something but she didn't see me i think/HOPE. lol

Anyway i told my brother who it was and why i was like "we have to leave"... he thought it was weird that i didn't just tap her shoulder and say hey or anything... which is what i would have loved to do but i just couldn't. I didn't feel that i looked my best so i never like people to see me. I mean i looked ok but to me ok isn't good enough... i also don't know what to do when i say 'hey'... like do i smile and walk away, do i ask more questions? i am completely clueless!

I now feel really awkwad about it because i should have said hey. i feel like such a freak. GRRRRRRRRR. I am so mad at myself. I do this ALL the time in these situations. I just try and hide rather than saying hello.

Just wanted to share that because it was driving me MAD.

recluse · Posted: Wed Apr 23, 2008 9:44 pm Post subject:

I know, i feel as if i freeze whenether a girl who i know comes face to face with me. I try my best to think of girls as being no different to guys but i end up freezing anyway. It sucks.

IceLad · Posted: Sat Apr 26, 2008 9:50 pm Post subject:

There's nothing more frustrating than being unable to say hello to people you've known for years.

It ain't worth beating yourself up over, especially as it works both ways. On a few occasions, I've pretended not to see someone coming and placed myself right in their path to see whether they would greet me. Most do, but a few others have definitely seen me, but don't utter a word and walk on by.

burner21 · Newbie User Joined: Mar 02, 2008 Posts: 31

I go through that seems like everyday. sometimes, if i see someone i know from a distance, especially a girl, i'll always take a detour and go a longer route to where i was going just to avoid the awkwardness because i never have anything to say.

mustang · Posted: Mon Apr 28, 2008 6:18 am Post subject:

Practice makes perfect my friend.

Try smiling, and saying 'Hello' to complete strangers...While walking in the opposite direction as them, while in halls, at work, on the train/bus, etc.

Best of luck to you!

scorpion · Posted: Mon Apr 28, 2008 5:41 pm Post subject:

I use to do that, pretend I didnt saw a person so I wasnt force to say hello.
But now I am aware the reason I did it was APD, so when the urge to look the other way, or run as hell in the other direction shows up I just say to myself "APD talking not you" and I force myself to stay put and say hello.
Sometimes APD still wins but I have had a few victories as well.

Baby steps.

_________________

wooaah · Intermediate User Joined: Apr 24, 2008 Posts: 108

same.. so many times i just pretend not to see someone. I feel like i'm being so rude. Its not so much the hello that i'm worried about. Its what comes next. I just have no idea what to say.

"so, hows it going."
"uh...."