Who cares?

Chiaroscuro · Posted: Thu Apr 24, 2008 5:23 pm Post subject: Who cares?

Hey guys.

I'm feeling really paranoid about whether people are capable of genuine altruism. Sad

I badly want to believe that they are, and that things like love and friendship really exist, but I'm unsure. I fear that Iv'e been deluded all this time and that people just need eachother when they are not independant. For humans, (as apposed to other animals), is cohabitation really about mutual benefit, or are we genuinely capable of selfless love or friendship with eachother?

I'm very confused at the moment, so I don't know if I'm just being paranoid, but I feel the significance of this question is huge for an ADP sufferer.

People think I'm a 'nice guy' but at the moment I'm struggling to tell the difference between a nice guy and a wimp. Can you really be caring and strong? Or do people just care so they will be cared for etc?

I'd really appreciate any replies on this guys. I realize that even raising this insecurity might make me appear uncaring, but honestly I'm just confused at the moment. I dont know whether to trust people, or to see them as opposition!

ghost_train · Posted: Thu Apr 24, 2008 7:30 pm Post subject: Re: Who cares?

To me, this question seems to be addressing that old classic: 'is it possible to commit an unselfish act?' Even when we do something that seemingly is of no benefit to ourselves, but only to others, it can be argued that we will inevitably feel good about having done his, and that, crucially, we wouldn't have done it if we had known prior to doing it that we wouldn't feel any positivity in ourselves afterwards.

From this coldly analytical point of view, no, I don't think it is possible to commit an unselfish act- but nor do I think that, under the definition set out, an 'unselfish act' would be any 'better'.

We cannot, nor surely would we want to, navigate life according only to our logical faculties- emotion is what makes life worth living. But we cannot feel the emotion of others, therefore our desire to commit good acts are in relation to our own emotions only- I don't believe that we could ever decipher right or wrong from logic alone- emotion is a vital component. If you want to start geting philosophical about it- we can only know our own minds. Knowledge of everything outside our consciousness is known to us only by induction. My point is: yes I think humans can feel unconditional love for each other, no it is not selfless in the absolute literal sense, but nor could it, nor should we want it, to be.

Chiaroscuro · Posted: Thu Apr 24, 2008 10:52 pm Post subject:

Thanks ghost_train.

I think I already know the answer, and your right. We do appear to care, or need to care on some level in order to be happy.

But I guess the logical part of my brain feels dissatisfied that I can't explain love or altruism. I sometimes try to find out how it might be some sort of symptom that we all have. And the most successful/strongest people always seem to have this slightly narcassistic manner. They perform well because they are fearless. They are fearless because they are not sensitive. And they are not sensitive because they are not emotional. It seems sometimes like their strength comes from their emotional detachment and their self-sufficiency.

You certainly hear many people state the contrary; that strength comes from love, or that it's when you're strong that you are able to give more to others. Hmmm?

But yeah, I mean, whenever we go through experiences with others we grow closer naturally. If it's natural to care then I guess it's right to care. Maybe I'm not a closet sinic after all!

Pinker · Posted: Thu May 08, 2008 9:07 pm Post subject:

You don't need to worry.. there are a lot of people that genuinely care for others.. including me. You don't hear too much about us though. I have thought this way at times probably because I feel insecure.. i'm not surprised we ponder because of the horrible way the world seems to be these days (in a generalised way). But I think it's a very unhealthy thought. People need to have some kind of general strength and drive to get on in everyday life, but that's only a necessary part of most societies. Be true to yourself.

_________________
i'm a guy

Doomed2Die · Posted: Thu May 08, 2008 9:49 pm Post subject:

There are people who selfishly care about others around, but don't expect them to be particually noticable.

Those who are not selfish, do it out of love.

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social_phobia2008 · Newbie User Joined: Mar 22, 2008 Posts: 39

this is an interesting topic Laughing

so from what i understood the subject is: is it possible to commit an unselfish act, like ghost_train said.

i once saw a documentary on discovery or some similar channel and the conclusion was NO, it is'nt possible

everytime you do something that seems altruist, just ask yourself: what do i get from this ? and even the feel good factor makes the altruist null

it was hard for me to explain why so i do stuff out of mercy ? i get nothing in exchange, but i realised i did, it was the feel good factor that it was discussed in this topic

(sorry for my english)