Posted: Fri Dec 14, 2007 6:04 pm Post subject: What are your Worse Anxiety Fears
Greetings Fellow SA',s
Since we're all individuals, social anxiety affects us all differently. For example, I don't have any problems with public speaking and other situations where I am in control. So I wanted to take inventory of what people's biggest fears are when it comes to SA.
Mine is social networking situations, when the business part is done and now it's down to personal time. Either I'm very forward and try and control the situation, but usually I will withdraw and become very passive. If it's during a business trip I will usually sneak off to my room and order room service. I have this fear that I'm not a good story teller or funny enough. And I am under the impression that's how people evaluate others, true or not.
And another anxiety is answering the telephone. I wonder who is calling, what do they want, why are the calling? I am not prepared to speak with them and will be put on the spot or I think I have nothing to say. So I often screen my calls and (sometimes) call people back. I have lost friendships and ruined relationships doing this.
I guess I'd have to say my biggest fear is people revealing something about me that either makes me look stupid or makes my self esteem drop. Pretty much, like you said, it's the personal aspect. I'm pretty awkward in my life because of it (haha), and I often avoid social situations; however, I know by testing the theory that I'm pretty likable when I just accept and be myself. I also happen to think this is true for everyone else here.
SO in normal everyday life, I'm unaffected by people... unless I have to talk to them! And what's worse, if it's personal matters... I suck at that sort of thing. However, some days I can, say, apply for a job/do an interview with pretty okay confidence, but.... that's on a good day! Some days I struggle to even make a damn phone call! (lol)
Anyways, I'm learning to open up and let everyone see everything about me. That way, you got nothing to hide. Which somehow eliminates most of the fear. Now I'm learning to laugh at myself whenever I screw up, and I don't mind if others do so either. Bottom line, I don't feel much of a desire to change anymore... I'll just let it happen as it pleases, and support it with a lot of positivity - and so far, so good
Joined: Jul 23, 2006 Posts: 359 Location: -Gulf of Mexico-
Posted: Sat Dec 15, 2007 1:24 am Post subject:
I agree with vulvetomy
Quote:
people revealing something about me that either makes me look stupid or makes my self esteem drop.
I ve made many improvements but the glass wall that holds me back is that I, and ,I am sure many people with anxiety dont have a lot of practice in social situations. As a result we are in-experienced in many things that the extroverts/loud mouths take for granted.
When ever I am in a conversation I am constantly worrying about the topic of my social life getting into the conversation; so I end up saying things to kill the conversations. If that is not possable I try to steer the conversation away from me by any means possable.
Whats sad and drains my energy is the fact that I spend a life time worrying about something that has never happened to me. Even if it does I will probaly handle it or even worst no one will care about it after the conversation ends.
My worst anxiety is performing on stage such as singing or acting. This really sucks because my secret desire is to be a singer someday. Social phobia anxiety prevents me from doing so many things, it is so frustrating!! Another anxiety situation is meeting or talking to new people. Sometimes I wish I could stay in my dorm room and never go out into the world.
Joined: Dec 14, 2004 Posts: 73 Location: South Africa
Posted: Mon Mar 31, 2008 10:26 pm Post subject:
Hey Zettie. I can truly emphathise with you there. I also have stage fright. I used to be a musician who would "made a living' from various gigs but since my SA symptoms sprang up again I havent seen a stage in over a year.
\In everyday life though, my biggest fear is that people are watching and judging me as I go along my daily life.
Joined: Aug 09, 2007 Posts: 31 Location: Melbourne
Posted: Mon Mar 31, 2008 11:52 pm Post subject:
Zettie wrote:
My worst anxiety is performing on stage such as singing or acting. This really sucks because my secret desire is to be a singer someday. Social phobia anxiety prevents me from doing so many things, it is so frustrating!! Another anxiety situation is meeting or talking to new people. Sometimes I wish I could stay in my dorm room and never go out into the world.
I have the same thing. I thought I would conquer my fear a few months ago - I went up on stage and I sang and played guitar...I did 4 songs, I screwed up the first 2 songs badly, but the last 2 songs I got more comfortable up there and I did great. My whole life I wouldn't ever sing in front of ANYONE! Not even my family, even though I know I can sing. So it was a huge deal for me to do this, it was probably one of my worst fears. I am still quite scared of it, but I need to do it again.
i would have to say my worst fear is finding out that there is something wrong with my health or that i only have a few months to live. this all started when one of my mother's co- workers literally dropped dead from an aneurisym she didn't know he had... im afraid of the same thing happening to me. and i start to worry about the people that are depending on me.
everytime soemthing aches, i think the worst. i get completely wrapped up in these thoughts sometimes that i am so distracted and forgetful, leading to my doubting of my own sanity.
Lately, ive just ben trying to keep myself busy and distracted...but man, as you all know, it;s tough and there have been some really really bad days.
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