panic attacks getting worse

chemboy · Newbie User Joined: Jul 20, 2008 Posts: 1

I have suffered from panick attacks since college. Today was especially bad. I went to the movies by myself and during it started to have uncontrollable thoughts about being a bad person. I had my typical heart throbbing symptoms and extreame discomfort, but it was a new experience in the way I was thinking. Like I was a bad person and that I will never get "in controll" again. I have never once thought of bringing harm on myself or others, but there was this fear that sometime it might happen. It was like a voice that was telling me that everything I have accomplished in life is null and void and that I will never gain controll. There was an overwhelming fear of ending up in a nut house. I took Valium that was prescribed to me and it calmed me down a bit, but I am really scared of returning back to that way of thinking.

I take zoloft for anxiety but I will admit that there are multiple days that I forget to take it. I take valium when I absolutely cant do without it, but I have a fear that it just masks my symptoms and that it will eventually not help.

This is a note of desperation. I should not feel this way. I have a masters degree in chemistry and had a great childhood. I have a great relationship with my parents but can't bother them with what I go through because my mom would worry all the time. I live over 10 hours from my home town, but I have met some people here.

I am looking for balance in my life in the form of someone else to share my life with. The problem is that I live alone and most of my time meeting girls is in the bar setting and it hasn't worked out for me lately. I miss home, but I am not sure moving back will solve my problems. I finally came to realize I need help and need to talk to someone to put in place control mechanisms. The problem is that I called a psychiatrist and they never got back to me. I need to find someone to talk to, to get to the route of what is bothering me because I don't think I can continue to have these attacks.

I am asking for advice on who to go to psychiatrist, counseler, etc. I am sorry that this is jumbled, but I am kind of having an attack right now. I really am a good person, but I feel so alone.

Any suggestions or tips would be appreciated.

Thanks Much!

Realizum · Newbie User Joined: Jul 18, 2008 Posts: 4

One of the most common things in all of us who suffer from panic attacks is negative or irrational thoughts...they leave as when the symptoms fades...have u taken any medication to help u reduce the symptoms?First of all dont stuck with that why to me...take a walk in the forum...u will see that intelligent people r here unlikely other forums where u can see anything...i am new too but i took a long walk...i cant suggest u solutions...i hate negative thoughts too...but if u see u cant fight it and it tires u there r some solutions to make u feel better short term or long term.One suggestion only...dont keep it in...even if it wont make u feel better to ur close ones u must share it.I am not giving any solutions away bc i havent passed over my problem too...keep up the fight!