I think it's easier to hate or dislike someone when you have SA. I am extremely judgmental and invariably look for faults rather than the good in a person. I also feel much more confortable when I am alone. This is a huge problem because I am married with two daughters. I think Mickey Rourke summed it up pretty well in the movie "Barfly" when he said, "It's not that I don't like people, I just feel better when they're not around".
Joined: May 29, 2008 Posts: 85 Location: Illinois, USA
Posted: Sat Jul 05, 2008 11:28 pm Post subject:
I find it really hard to like people too, I just don't trust them, I always have this fear people are talking behind my back. Plus if I get to know someone I usually get annoyed at them for one reason or another, for their personality or political beliefs or something. That's why I usually stay away from people cause If I don't know them very well I can't hate them for something.
Posted: Sun Jul 06, 2008 6:40 am Post subject: i cant like anyone i come across
I thought i was the only one who felt like they didnt like anyone at all, i think im a very genuine nice person and i feel like when i talk or see someone i can always pick up the evil in them and i dont see any niceness so it discourages me from speaking, i just get so uninterested in many people i block out possible friendship because i know once they see im uncomfortable they'll judge me and it wont work out anyone...this world only accepts outgoing friendly people and when ur not like that they outcast you, no matter even how good you look...this is one of the main reasons im so bitter that i cant like anyone
_________________ "Words too precious to take in vain"
Posted: Thu Jul 10, 2008 7:27 am Post subject: Re: I don't like anyone...
GKJB wrote:
I've realized that I'm unable to like people. I don't know exactly why, but generally I'm just unable to see nice in people, and if I do I don't think its genuine, because I feel like everyone's laughing at me. I really only have 1 friend, but I don't even feel relaxed or comfortable around him. I think he laughs at me & slags me off to his other mates behind my back, because I know I sometimes come out with weird stuff, or come across nervous & jittery towards people, or once in a while I'll talk too much then beat myself up about it when no-one listens.
He's been seeing a lot of his other mates & girlfriend, one of his mates he used to be best mates with, & I was also good mates with, but I went round there the other day & had nothing to say because I haven;t seen him in so long. This other mate pissed off with my mate for about an hour leaving me in a flat on my own with his mum, neither of them cared, & I just think everyone sees me as a complete mug, like they can fob me off and f**k me around & I won't be bothered.
I wish I could just stay at home away from everyone, but when I'm alone for too long I get depressed & start going over all the embarassing things I've done or said in the past, or stuff I regret & start feeling really guilty about it, making me more depressed & sometimes quite sick.
Not everyone wants to laugh at you. do you like doing that to others? Well if not, they don't either. I do laugh at certain things but not at others' distress or difficulties unless it was not important and I thought it was a little funny in a cute way or I didn't know it was really a problem, or etc. Or even if it was wierd or not so nice there's still a lot of other traits or things about a person that you would accept it as a part of their uniqueness. You can usually tell the context and heart people have in which they're laughing though and you don't want to be around those ppl anyway, and most of the time others don't even pay attention to every single thing you said or done or it's not clear in their mind later on.
Last edited by jinxed on Sat Nov 01, 2008 9:06 pm; edited 14 times in total
I have the same problem, it stems from the fact that i probably don't know how to deal well with people.
as a rule, people like who makes them feel good about themselves, being funny, educated, have an amazing smile,......etc
if you don't know how to make people feel good around you, the probably won't like you that much.
the good news is that it's workable! how you deal with people will improve dramatically as your experience grows, and as you read more about friends, people and relationships.
normal people might find it awkward or silly to read about this stuff, since it comes naturally to them, but never care.
I think I'll often dislike people because I think they dislike people... which is often due to my anxiety. I try to dislike them first so I wont be hurt by their rejection. It causes alot of problems with creating friendships.
Also I have a hard time letting past arguments go. If I argue with someone once I feel like there is no way they could ever like me again. Usually I can never rebuild trust in our relationship as friends again.
Posted: Mon Jul 21, 2008 3:04 pm Post subject: Re: i cant like anyone i come across
KeepItPoetic wrote:
I thought i was the only one who felt like they didnt like anyone at all, i think im a very genuine nice person and i feel like when i talk or see someone i can always pick up the evil in them and i dont see any niceness so it discourages me from speaking, i just get so uninterested in many people i block out possible friendship because i know once they see im uncomfortable they'll judge me and it wont work out anyone...this world only accepts outgoing friendly people and when ur not like that they outcast you, no matter even how good you look...this is one of the main reasons im so bitter that i cant like anyone
Ditto, I hate the fact that unless you're "bubbly" or "outgoing" you're seen as some kind of weirdo outcast for others to mock
I'm quite a loner. It's not like I really hate people or feel awkward around them, but I get tired of them soon enough. After I am around people for maybe a couple of hours, I really begin to dislike them and I only wish to drive or walk away to recover my missed solitude. It's not like people are uncomfortable around me either, but I often feel like they are more friendly with one another than with me. Whenever I join a group of some kind, I always feel like an outsider, even more so than other guys that happen to join after me.
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