explain the problem

outside_looking_in · Posted: Fri Jul 08, 2005 8:57 am Post subject: explain the problem

So does anyone ever say to eg. a teacher or a colleague, "Actually I have this SP" (or "problem with anxiety", or however you put it), "please understand and make allowances for me"? And does it make a difference?

Only said it to a few friends (who are usually kind, and used to me anyway), and my partner obviously -- he's a real social animal and totally doesn't understand , but usually comes round to being sympathetic if he sees I'm upset Sad

black_mamba · Posted: Fri Jul 08, 2005 9:11 am Post subject:

GettingThere · Posted: Fri Jul 08, 2005 11:50 am Post subject:

Low self-esteem and poor self image are hallmarks of the SP sufferer.

That makes us highly sensitive to how others view us and a byproduct of that is that we strive to avoid giving others any reason to think that we are not "normal". Naturally it follows that it would not be usual behaviour for the typical SP sufferer to announce to the world that they have this emotional problem.

I'm not saying that its wrong or even advantageous to tell others of our plight, just that it would not be very common. Power to those who do open up, I admire your bravery and humility.

_________________
Two men look through the same bars, one sees mud the other sees stars.

Chilling__Echo · Posted: Fri Jul 08, 2005 4:47 pm Post subject:

outside_looking_in · Posted: Fri Jul 08, 2005 10:58 pm Post subject:

maybe I',m not a true SP then ... just it seemed to explain all the problems I've had in my life and felt like i was fitting in here ... sorry to strike such a bum note, story of my life

wutnow · Posted: Sat Jul 09, 2005 5:10 am Post subject:

I told a professor in some introductory Polictical Science class that I would have a problem doing the oral presentation and would it be possible if I could be excused from it. It was the weak way out, but I was a wreck back then, so he said it was ok Laughing

.

So the day of the presentations with everyone sittting in a big circle, the MF calls on me to begin my presentation Mad

. I'm like; "you are f:cking kidding me right - this situation is royally f:ktup!"
It still annoys me, but only because of the audaciousness of it.

"You told me I didn't have to do it Embarassed

."
(5 of them)
Great. What a MF.

It was a good class otherwise and he was a great instructor. I didn't learn anything otherwise from the experience and it didn't dissuade me from telling people whatever my problem was at that time. If the problems created by it were greater than the problems created by displaying it, it was worth getting it out in the open. Sometimes the best was so bad it might as well have been the worst. In other words, there was very little differentiation from the best and worst effort - they both sucked.

Just another wierd 'side calculus benefit/ loss' thing going on in the mind of people that worry too much Wink

We can get better. I'm ok with presentations now.

No bum note at all man, you just asked a question. That's legitimate Very Happy

.

outside_looking_in · Posted: Sat Jul 09, 2005 10:12 am Post subject:

Thanks, wutnow ... I need to keep things in perspective a bit Cool

Perhaps the professor, not appreciating the nature of your SA, thought that you're good at the subject and, if you didn't have the anticipation and dread, you might manage to give the presentation if put on the spot - though of course it don't work like that! Embarassed

From when I was 7 I used to get into a panic (dizziness, vomiting etc) on the morning of any special occasion, family birthdays, days out etc. So my parents decided to try not warning me and, instead of going shopping one day (which I could handle--retail therapy gene activated even then!) we arrived at a gala day. I froze up, couldn't eat and walked round all day numb and knotted up ... Nope, definitely a bad tactic! Razz

wutnow · Posted: Mon Jul 11, 2005 4:21 am Post subject: