People who treat you like a joke

Marin · Last edited by Marin on Sun Sep 18, 2005 5:40 am; edited 2 times in total

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thoughtless

Chilling__Echo · Posted: Sun Jul 17, 2005 12:48 am Post subject:

whenever i feel like i'm being held back and become bitter at other people for their blessings in life (i.e. NOT having SA) i just try and remember that everyone has their demons. everyone has to deal with something and this is just the cards we were delt. it's all in how you deal with it in return that makes us all unique.

and trust me, i know it's easier said than done. that's why i rarely tell people about it b/c there is a stigma against mental illness. just keep your head up and if you really feel like you're being laughed at (truely), then you have the right to say something. don't take it. and remember that THEY are the ones with the character flaws, and in the process you've gained an open mind, something they obviously don't have.

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Marin · Posted: Sun Jul 17, 2005 2:54 am Post subject:

Chilling Echo, I know I should keep in mind that these people are close-minded and that if anyone should be ashamed it's them, but it's hard for me sometimes because it feels like it's me against everyone I come in contact with. The problem with defending myself is there seems to be a ten minute lag on my brain Rolling Eyes

Chilling__Echo · Posted: Sun Jul 17, 2005 3:22 am Post subject:

especially since they are family, i know it hurts, you have quite the predicament there... Sad

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lsgv · Posted: Sun Jul 17, 2005 6:59 am Post subject:

Today i was in a get together with some other friends. I feel they always talk about me looking sad and lonely and keep observing me. Some times they make indirect comments that hurts you.

How to takle such situations. I also feel that my brain has a 10 min lag and until i understand what was said, the subject has already been changed. That time i feel so crappy and i know they are idiots in their own way but i feel sad as i couldn't answer them back. Also, since they are all united, it is difficult for me say something against each and every one. IT will only back fire and things will get only worse. It seems they have more power since i am left alone.

I don't always keep quiet. Sometimes i say how miserable they are, but only when i am one to one. In a group it is always difficult to tackle such a situation, since i am not good in conversing and talking aloud, so that can be heard

I feel really bad during such times..I want to leave all of them..but since they are the only friends that i have, i try to swallow my pride and just move, even though i am hurt.

Do you have any solution how to deal with such encounters? Any ideas.

blubs · Posted: Sun Jul 17, 2005 5:01 pm Post subject:

I have that *10 minute brain lag * too!

sometimes I think its because I am just slow-witted....
but its more likely(I HOPE!) that when you're nervous or anxious, its harder to concentrate fully on what is being said. It can make you a bit of a target sometimes though.....because people pick up that you're less likely to have a comeback that will make them look bad.

But it doesn't mean that everyone that has ever said anything to put you on the spot is an idiot, or mean. They're just having a laugh. I don't think it helps to think of yourself as always the victim of other people. They probably don't even know you're affected so much by what they say.

I read a good piece of advice by a lovely man who's name I can't remember...but he wrote the t.v. series 'Rumpole of the baily'(think thats it .....never watched it)....
ANYWAY.....he said....WORRY LESS ABOUT BEING OFFENDED or CAUSING OFFENCE.
Which I think is good advice to people with social phobia, because we are often too sensitive.
He also suggested starting the day with a glass of champaign Very Happy

which is advice I would happily take if I had the money!

Jack7 · Posted: Sun Jul 17, 2005 8:15 pm Post subject:

**** them. It's their problem if they want to be funny with you over it. Why should you care what they think? Don't feel like you have to explain yourself to everyone you meet! Smile

Carina33 · Posted: Sun Jul 17, 2005 9:08 pm Post subject:

I know exactly what it is..... I can only talk comfortably to people that I know very well. All others think there is something wrong with me and that I am less of a person just because I cannot talk to them. I know that I am a bit of a joke when I am seen doing something that only "normal people" would be doing. I try not to let it worry me..... too much.
I seem to have that problem too though. Whenever I am just meeting people and am feeling really uncomfortable, it's as if I can't hear them just like they can't hear me. It's as if a lot of what they are saying just doesn't enter my mind. It is so difficult to overcome.

Jack7 · Posted: Sun Jul 17, 2005 9:33 pm Post subject:

I think that maybe these people aren't thinking that you're less of a person, but that you are thinking they're thinking that because you're not saying much. I know I've felt that way in the past (still do).