Can't Look people in the eyes

Cacophony · Posted: Sun Jun 19, 2005 5:40 pm Post subject: Can't Look people in the eyes

Hi.. i need someone's help very bad. Ive never been more depressed in my entire life right now and just lost my great job because of my problem. The other day i just left work with out telling anyone and called my boss's answering machine telling him i quit because im crazy and i need help. I can't look anyone in the eyes at all anymore. I lost all my friends because of it. My mother wants me to come visit her soon and i'm not going to go because i know i won't be able to look my own mom in the eyes. Every time i look at someone... it's like i dont look in to them normal, i look straight into their souls or something and it freaks them out. It feels like i forgot to look at them normally. Then when ever i try to do it i can never do it right, and it leaves me feeling with complete dread and stupidity. I have nothing anymore. I will never be able to meet a girl, new friends, and get another job if this goes on. This isn't me at all either... everyone used think i was the most awesome guy in the world and i was comfortable with anyone. This isn't just shyness.. this is hell.

Jameo · Posted: Sun Jun 19, 2005 5:59 pm Post subject:

Yeh man i empathise with u
u should wear reflective sunglasses whenever possible. Cool

also practising staring at youself in the mirror.do it naked if possible so u feel free and unashamed.start lookin at the mirror for 5 minutes.the next day do 6,the next 7 etc.
within a couple of weeks you will be staring people out of it.

LonerSx · Newbie User Joined: Jun 14, 2005 Posts: 8 Location: Oman

ooh my god!!!!

You r depicting the same thing which I have been going through since last 12 years. I have full sympathy with you. I myself don't know what to do. This really is hell. After this problem has started with me...all the beauty in this world has gone. Everyone even my own parents are strangers to me now. I have lost all my friends and people whom I loved. Now as days are passing I am getting more and more isolated.

When I speak to someone without looking into his eyes, i have to emphasize and over-emphasize myself to make myself heard. No body believes me. It is like shouting at the top of the voice and saying "WHAT I AM SAYING IS THE TRUTH" but no body cares. I say something else and my eyes says something else. I don't blame them. I wouldn't have been different if I would have been in their place. But I cannot participate in any activity I am not shared with any information I am treated like a liar, like a characterless fellow. It is like dying so many time before i actually die.

I am not able to believe that I have lived 12 years like this. Days have just passed struggling, suffocating, soulsearching in full of depression. I have not remained the person which I actually am. Who am I, where am I...I have lost my self and is always searching a meaning to live.

Sorry friend......since I am in the same boat as yours..............drown me also along with the boat when it sinks

Cacophony · Posted: Sun Jun 19, 2005 8:21 pm Post subject:

Thx for your guy's help so far i really appreciate it. Damn LonerSx.... 12 years yeah thats terrible. This has probably going on for me for about 3 years. If i figure a way out to fix this problem i keep you informed.

Cacophony · Posted: Sun Jun 19, 2005 8:28 pm Post subject:

By the way it feels good to finally meet someone who cares and has the same problem

maggie · Posted: Mon Jun 20, 2005 12:46 am Post subject:

Cacophony...i have this problem too...looking into people's eyes...do you wear glasses? I now have a pair of transitions....they are tinted glasses and they help me a lot...i wear them all the time...maybe that will help you too Cool

..i hope

SilverLiner · Posted: Mon Jun 20, 2005 1:15 am Post subject:

I'm sorry you find it so hard to look people in the eye. I must admit I find it hard a lot of the time. I often give myself little exercises when I'm out. One is to look into the eyes of whoever is at the till of a shop when I buy something. It's usually right at the end of the transaction when I get my change. If it's that awkward that I can't do it then it won't matter too much, they won't be too offended. If you stare at them and it's too awkward then you just walk off and you probably won't see or recognise them again.

_________________
I'm never speaking up again, it only hurts me.

Sue · Posted: Sun Jul 24, 2005 6:39 pm Post subject:

when i was on a date with my ex glfrnd i spent the whole night staring into my pint glass.

Bexi · Posted: Sun Jul 24, 2005 10:08 pm Post subject:

i cant look anyone in the eye, its too personal. It's also one of the symptons of having SP/SA so im sure lots of ppl experience it. If i do manage to look ppl in the eye i can't concentrate on what theyre saying!

Bexi · Posted: Sun Jul 24, 2005 10:11 pm Post subject:

whoops just realised this is shyness only not SP! hmmmm sorry!