Posted: Fri Jul 09, 2004 12:43 am Post subject: advice please
Hey Everyone, i've never really done this before in the message board. I'm a 17 year old female who suffers from Social Anxiety/Phobia. My real problem is that my parents are CONSTANTLY pressuring me to get a job , the thing is im TERRIFIED of the interview and just working with people I dont know serving strangers and what not. They don't understand and give little to no sympathy because they don't know what it's like, I try to explain that i'm just so scared because of the SP. But they don't "buy it". I want a job but i'm just terrified of authority figures - boss. And people I don't know im scared they'll see me worried and anxious and just me constnantly worrying if im going to make an ass of myself.."humiliate myself" in right terms. Anyways, if anyone can relate please help, because i'm getting pushed SO hard for a job and I don't know what to do because no one I know understands or can relate.
thanks for your time.
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Joined: Nov 26, 2003 Posts: 117 Location: United Kingdom
Posted: Fri Jul 09, 2004 7:26 pm Post subject:
I'm 21 ust graduate from uni another 3 years of ups and downs but I got through it. I now nee a job and have exactly the same fears. I over exagerate in interviews scared shitless because I don't want the to think I'm too quite ( I hate those words together too quite). THe all advertise the same bloody thing : looking for enthuastic ,confident, with exellent interpersonnal skills and a good phone manne. Even if I did get a job I would total withdraw myself, or thats just what I think will happen. I really don't want it to happen and it may not. I'm just going keep trying you never now it might just be the thing I need to give me a kick up the arse to get over it.
Your have to face your fear, those jobs like telephoning people, waiting on people or any job that wants you to talk to stranges it may give you a boost the exposure you need. Forhet about the SP make a new start and build yourself from thier, desperatly need to take my own advice sometimes.
I know how you are feeling. Around people that I don't know, I get real quiet and alot of times my face will turn red when they ask me questions. When I finally did get a job in a factory everyone would talk about how quiet I was then they would comment on my face turning red. But after a while, I got used to everyone and I was able to overcome my anxiety of going to work. Although I still had anxiety in other situations.
When i read what you wrote, it was as if i had written it. I'm also a 17 year old girl and my parents want me to get a job too. Their always looking in the paper for places for me to put a resume in. Even handing in a resume makes me nervous. i've been to a couple of interviews, but they weren't really big ones, but i was still really nervous. i try not to think about them, and after i do one i feel so good about myself. but i'm more worried about getting a job. I try to think of places where i don't have to talk to many people, but then i got to thinking, how am i ever going to overcome this if i don't face my fears. sure you'll have bad days, but life goes on, eventually. I wish i didn't have to get a job, but i really like money. i haven't had any luck so far though, but i don't mind. The interviews aren't that bad, it's getting a job that would scare me. My advice to you is to try and pick places you would feel the most comfortable working in. That's what i do. unless my parents make me hand in a resume somewhere, it's like "leave me alone!". I hope my advice is useful.
Ive been pressured alot by my parents too get a job. I think people dont understand how bad it really is, its more than shyness its a crippling illness that disables your life. But my doctor dosent want me too work or interact too much for the next 3 months or so while ill take medication and do CBT therapy and now my parents have stepped back alot and are actually helping with it alot. I advise speaking with your doctor maybe get him too write a letter too your parents so they understand better cause being pressured with this illness dosent help atall your just shit scared 24/7
Hey Thanks alot for taking the time to reply ..I haven't yet tried for a job yet. But I'm more confident to atleast apply, if I can accomplish that im halfway there. Well I hope it all goes well for me, good luck to all of you as well. Thanks again for listening
Wow this sounds very familiar. I'm 16 and my whole family, not only constantly bugs me to get a job, but to get my drivers permit! They don't get that the thought of both turns my stomach and leaves me so depressed. It reminds me that one day I will have to do such things. I will have to move out of the house. That terrifies me. You are so not alone. Good luck.
Hey, I know!! Along with the Job its the Driving Licence. I got my G1 (permit) last Feb. I JUST completed the in class lessons, but im so scared of the in car that I haven't even called my driving instructor! he's called 3 times im so scared to do it but i can't avoid it much longer.
Posted: Mon Jul 19, 2004 11:22 am Post subject: Reply..
Hi I am 15 years old and I have work experience in a few weeks time. I still havent gotten a placemnt yet while all my friends have. Im very nervous about being with people and especially the interview! I keep posponing it. Do you think i should just cancel it all togehte ror go for it and make a big fool of myself?
Does anyone here have a porlbem of being in the SAME ROOM as people and they cant stay in. i miss tons of school beucase i cant force myself to go in! what should i do?
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