Posted: Sun Aug 29, 2004 5:04 pm Post subject: Yes
Hi, it can be done, I did it and so have others, in fact I think that medications often cause more trouble and good, people start to feel better often when they start taking them, but find that they are never truely happy and still have the same thoughts, just without the anxiety, they often find everything is worse or the same when they come off them. I think medications have their place, particularly for when people are very unstable and suicidal and could seriously harm themselves or other people, I think they are greatly overused and over rated though and are no solution, they just mask the problem and should only be a temproary measure and be used along side progress towards psychological change. (concluded from my own personal experiences of myself and others, I am no medical professional).
I learnt a lot that helped me make the changes I needed through studying NLP (Neuro Linguistic Programming) and CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy), let me assert that NLP and CBT will not cure your SA, what you do with what you learn from them can. You do not have social anxiety, you are socially anxious, if you attack social anxiety, you attack yourself, if you try and get rid of social anxiety you will likely fail, if you work towards replacing it with something positive then you can succeed.
Have faith in your ability to learn and change, it can be done and the journey is fun and rewarding, not hard painful, but it does require you to take action and lots of it. It can be done, we all can do it, no one can do it for us, but we can benefit from others help.
Joined: Jul 23, 2005 Posts: 9 Location: United Kingdom
Posted: Sun Jul 24, 2005 1:03 pm Post subject:
terresap wrote:
If you are telling me that its never going to go away then what? am I stuck in this fukn crazy head forever? will I ever be able to do the things that I can only dream about? Im really not going to get any better am I? Im fukd for life? Please tell me its not true.
...... so plan on probably working in an office environment when I finish. I can sort of handle uni, im strong and will my best at it. I was under the impression that doing things that will be hard and confronting for my SP will help me, if I get out and do the things that are hard then doesnt that make it easier to cope with next time? Am I fooling myself? Im not sure if I want to know the answer to that.
This isnt good.
I think a more positive way of putting it is that knowing you have social phobia, you can manage your life better. That may involve drug therapy, it may not. It may involve other things like CBT. Basically you decide. You be proactive about it. It's important to feel that you are in control of your life.
It seems you are successful at some situations, like going to Uni, but you have limits. So know your limits and work round them. This way you don't waste effort on things that are not right for you and direct your energies into areas where you are more confident you can succeed.
I have worked in an office for many years and always found it unbearable and ended up changing jobs a lot, with adverse effects on my career. I am in my late 50s and still at the bottom of the pile. I am off work at the moment because of the SP. HOWEVER, I am also doing courses that will lead to a career in counselling. I believe I will be able to handle this because it is nearly all one-on-one work and everyone says I am doing great at this. So, it's a case of me managing the situation in a way that works for me. You need to do the same. You may end up working in an office as you choose and overcoming the issues you have. Or you may rethink your choice and do something else. It's important you do it in a way where you keep control over your life.
A lot of people in IT work from home. This is a compromise you might want to consider. You are in the office say one day a week to attend meetings, talk with the boss etc., and at home the rest of the time working remotely. Just a thought, this might work for you, it might not.
_________________ All the best,
John
The only difference between me and a madman is that I am not mad.
Joined: Mar 26, 2005 Posts: 8 Location: United States of America
Posted: Wed Jul 27, 2005 1:32 pm Post subject:
Thus far, I have not used anykind of outside help to improve my social habits. I'm kind of happy but, where I am is not enough, I want to be absolutly normal.
Maybe if I can get a hold of a good e-book, I might be able to help myself to greatness. Any recommendations?
Joined: Oct 14, 2004 Posts: 112 Location: Australia
Posted: Wed Jul 27, 2005 3:44 pm Post subject:
Its up to the indivudual as to whether or not to use medication to overcome SA or any other problem. I personally have chosen not to but that is my choice. Some people struggle to get through each day and the medication helps them to cope better.
Medication wont cure your SA, it wont get rid of the symptions it will just help you cope abit better. The only way to overcome SA completley is through CBT and changing the way you think about things. People with SA are usually very negative and have low self esteem so that is where CBT comes in.
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