Understanding, how important is this for you?

richkid

People have posted that they want to tell their parents or someone but fear they won't understand. Isn't that what everyone whats a little understanding of how they feel. Everyone has something they want to share, something that bothers them and nobody understands because they haven't lived their life. I understand what most of you feel but if someone told me they had a sexual love for horses, or felt more comfortable with out a limp (it happens!) i would find that strange. There is so many things people are afriad of that don't bother me and that i don't understand. I don't understand why people smoke but I can accept it.

Is it understanding people want or acceptance? & whats the difference?

shep · Posted: Mon Jul 26, 2004 4:03 am Post subject:

I guess we all feel the need for both from those significant people in our lives to help us deal with this better. It is, I suppose, impossible for someone to understand sp unless they have it. However, I think that if someone would spend an hour or so reading some of the posts here, they would realize that the problem is real and should help them accept that in a relative or friend. It should also help them understand avoidance which is most often misunderstood for indifference. Anyway, thanks for bringing up this interesting thread as well as your other contributions to this site.

scardecat · Guest

boy, interesting! Ya know whats kind of funny about this question is that right now, i dont want acceptance so much, just want people to not notice that im kinda "out there" sometimes. Dont know how to explain what im trying to say, but i just enjoy my time and dont want someone pity accepting me or something like that. I just want to blend. See, im not like most of you i dont think, in that i'm ok with strangers, it's people i've met that i freeze up with. Or a scheduled meating up of a stranger, now that is scarry. (well, it's not scarry cause actually i wouldnt let that happen) But just an off the street stranger, well, i dont think they can tell my feelings cause im just quite friendly so i actually enjoy being around stangers. Just dont set me up to meet a stanger cause then there's expectations and thats no no's to me. Understanding, again, i just dont want people to have to think about me to have to try to understand me, so i carry on so usually people dont have a clue. Geesh, i do go off on the wrong things here, but hope i made something clear at least. Confused

Think it's my age that puts me in a different situation of not needing either. who knows.

scardiecat · Guest

i was just re reading sheps coments and so want to say that, with significant people in my life, yes i want both understanding and acceptance,and i really wouldnt even know which would be more important to me. I was just thinking of the general public in my last post. Boy, somehow, re reading has put a whole diferent perspective than when i read it the first time. oue....it's weard, i just dont want it noticed so which would that be??? Hum, mabie just i would like to be accepted for "all" of who i am. Thats mabie my answer. Rolling Eyes

richkid · Posted: Mon Jul 26, 2004 6:01 pm Post subject:

Interesting points, I guess one is never as important than the other.
Maybe understanding leads to acceptance. I think its more for me the understanding and accepting of myself that frustrates me the most. In understanding and accepting yourself does it matter if others don't ? Guess that what every shrink trys to tell you but why the hell won't it just bloody sink in.

Parents are there to support and understand, it may be just as difcult for them not understanding why you feel the way to you. I know my mum especially thought it was something she had done. Funny thing is I don't want to be accepted as the role i've someone has given to me. I want to be accpeted as who i am, can't really do that if i don't know what that is.