Joined: Jun 30, 2004 Posts: 28 Location: United Kingdom
Posted: Thu Jul 01, 2004 6:08 pm Post subject:
I can't seem to talk when I'm around men I'm attracted to and if Im dateing him i just lend up feeling loved up all the time and i can't talk to him wish i could snap out of it
Joined: Sep 20, 2004 Posts: 15 Location: United States of America
Posted: Mon Sep 20, 2004 4:24 am Post subject:
Females in general want men that are masculine...so if u want to have a relationship with a girl who is shy u just gotta take the lead and show her your in charge..but in a good seductive kind of way..and she will love u for that
Joined: Sep 20, 2004 Posts: 15 Location: United States of America
Posted: Mon Sep 20, 2004 10:27 pm Post subject:
its true...women want to naturally be dominated in a relationship..especially if they are shy they want the opposite kind of male..that way they can feel complete inside..
silver and gold is true in that these feelings os SAD are simply neurosis
for some people they are very sever and deeply ingrained..but you can grow out of them. People do fully recover from social anxiety
Posted: Sat Feb 26, 2005 1:38 pm Post subject: shy men and women
I don't have SA but My ex BF did, though I am very shy until You get to know Me and hate being the centre of attention, if I've not had anything to drink then I don't care...ha ha.
The reason I first liked my Boy friend though is because He was shy and I felt safe with Him, although I think more chatty people make You feel more at ease. There were times when I first started seieng my BF that we'd sit there and say "Say something then," to eachother and just laugh and telephone conversations are still really hard and I find that I don't know what to say too where as usually when I know someone really well, I can natter for England! But I still love My BF's nature!
Joined: Oct 04, 2004 Posts: 581 Location: New Zealand
Posted: Sat Feb 26, 2005 2:24 pm Post subject: Re: Compatability between shy people
contemplativo wrote:
One should note that Social Phobia can be interpreted as an "unmanly" personality trait and this has hindered my success with women in the past.
I can very much relate to that
Because I have SP I feel I cant really call myself a man as I lack those masculine attributes that one needs to attract girls - stuttering and having panic attacks whenever a social occasion arises is certainly not the way to attract girls. They would rather go to the loud mouthed confident jerk than the shy guy in the corner. A shy stupid creature who can't stick up for himself and play a confident role in society is not a man. Thats the message females give me anyway.
From what I've seen, SP can completely devastate a males chances of having a relationship whereas it doesnt make as much difference to females. A lot more females on this forum seem to be in relationships than guys.
Joined: Feb 10, 2005 Posts: 1831 Location: United States of America
Posted: Sun Feb 27, 2005 5:29 am Post subject:
maybe it's just because 1. i have SA and 2. i'm not a guy, but i don't go for the "masculine" guys. but when i think of that, i think more of frat boys that are atheletic, assertive, stronge "rock type" and almost assholes. i love shy guys and if that means i have to make the first move, fine. make yourself seem like the mysterious type and girls will be falling from the sky in your lap.
and even if you really like a chick and she doesn't make a move, start with just being friends. no pressure (haha, i know, easier said than done).
and even if you really like a chick and she doesn't make a move, start with just being friends. no pressure (haha, i know, easier said than done).
Of course, there's the risk of ending up being "just friends" (a.k.a. politely rejected), which might not be so nice. Once the girl gets herself a boyfriend, the "friend" is completely left out of the picture.
what if this shy "friend" guy suddenly becomes the wizard of the kids party? i mean the attraction of the night. would you dump him anyways?
he just not talk at all, but he gets wild at night. is that still shyness?.
why people cant just hug each other at first sight when they feel like? like you are walkin in the strees. you are shy, but you see this girl who stares at your eyes, both smile..i think the next should be a kiss and a good bye, if the kiss is good enough the peoples would have the chance to ask for phone numbers for future dates.. amm i forgot the original topic btw.
Joined: Mar 15, 2005 Posts: 1 Location: United States of America
Posted: Tue Mar 15, 2005 7:58 pm Post subject: Compatability between shy people
Hi everyone,
This is my first post in this forum. Regarding if two shy people can be compatable.....the answer is a resounding YES! I'm in my forties....so I'm speaking from wisdom here. I was fortunate enough to have been in love with someone who had SA just as bad as me. However, instead of driving us apart, our SA drew us together! My goodness, what a kind and giving heart she had. She felt things so deeply! And it was due to her introverted nature that she was this way. Together, we helped each other understand our introverted natures and our social anxiety. Because of her I finally became aware that my introverted personality is not abnormal....we simply are who we are. I began to appreciate my quiet nature and actually view it in a positive light instead of hating myself for it. I only knew her for nine months, and then she passed away. How badly I wanted to die without her. She was that very special woman who only comes around once in a person's lifetime.
But time does find a way to heal. And I am now a stronger man because of her love and the wisdom she imparted on me. I'm still as introverted as ever, but I honest to goodness love my introverted personality.....even if those around me don't!
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I was fortunate enough to have been in love with someone who had SA just as bad as me. However, instead of driving us apart, our SA drew us together! My goodness, what a kind and giving heart she had. She felt things so deeply! And it was due to her introverted nature that she was this way. Together, we helped each other understand our introverted natures and our social anxiety. Because of her I finally became aware that my introverted personality is not abnormal....we simply are who we are. I began to appreciate my quiet nature and actually view it in a positive light instead of hating myself for it. I only knew her for nine months, and then she passed away. How badly I wanted to die without her. She was that very special woman who only comes around once in a person's lifetime.
