standing up people-happens to me all the time.

carebear · Intermediate User Joined: Oct 25, 2005 Posts: 126

hEY,
HAS THIS evr happened to anyone? 'A friend of mine was suppossed to come over last weekend and stay over my house. We were going to go clubbing and to a couple bars.

All day I had been planniing for this thing. I cleaned my bathrooom like 7 times, and I vaccumed. She lives about 2 hrs away. On her way to my house she called me from her cell and I didn't answer. About 1 hr before she was about to arrive, I called her back and said that me car broke down because I simply just could not handle the stress of having her over my house. I just felt too embarrassed to let someone into my private space. I am always calling off things like that!!

I was diagnosed with mild ocd and severe depression when I was about 15. I also have generalized anxiety (doctors say its because I was born breach and had my hip displaced during birth. I was in a lot of pain for a lot of my childhood years.. They say that any type of pain dring the first couple years of life can lead to problems growing up. GUess it was true...

anywayz..anyone who can relate to any of this...please let me know.

carebear · Intermediate User Joined: Oct 25, 2005 Posts: 126

she is soooo pissed at me that I don't know what to do now.
I do regret not going. But the real issue here is the fact that I didn't want her to come over my house. I feel like things just are never clean enough. Embarassed

I vacuum constantly and clean my bathroom. but the house is old, so I cannot get the "oldness" out no matter what I do. It's difficult to pinpoint whether its anxiety or my o-c-d.

blubs · Posted: Wed Nov 23, 2005 7:42 pm Post subject:

To an outsider..it sounds more like OCD, if thats any help. I think quite a few people with social anxiety have some obsessive behaviour too, there was a thread about it a while ago.
Maybe they'e linked because people with SA are afraid of being judged? I freak out if someone comes to my house unexpected...as I feel like my house is never clean enough...or that I always look a mess Confused

carebear · Intermediate User Joined: Oct 25, 2005 Posts: 126

Thank YOU THank YOU!!!

someone else in the world feels the way I do!! Surprised

Where are you from? age/loc (if you don't mind??)

And when did you start feeling this way? I have always been scared of being judged since I was born probably. I do it w/ everyone....even family members I don't want to be judged by!! The people that know me best!! Embarassed

blubs · Posted: Wed Nov 23, 2005 9:55 pm Post subject:

hi carebear
I've always felt like this I think. My parents brought us up in a really dirty house and I was a bit neglected in that respect...so I think thats whats made me like this now.
I try and keep a perspective on whats ok and whats obsessive. I don't know about you, but I find that it can escalate...I mean the more I try and keep everything perfect..the worse I get, it sort of spirals.