Losing interest and passions, why won't they come back?

Flax

I was wondering, is there anyone in here that has lost all passion for everything? Over the last six years slowly I've lost interest in nearly everything I used to enjoy. I used to paint, draw and make things and I was quite obsessed with it. I used to play video games and be totally engrossed in the experience until I finished the games. I at one point was obsessed with exercise and got into great physical shape and felt invincible. Although I've never been a big reader, whenever I used to start a book I'd not be able to put it down. Now I have a shelf of books that I bought and was interested in reading them, but only read a chapter or two and put them away. I also have many video games I haven't finished and even some that I barely played at all. I bought some canvases and gesso boards to paint on and I have started paintings only to get furious and rip the canvas apart. I can't think of anything to paint and when I do force myself to paint something I usually paint part of it and decide it looks like shit and I destroy it. Same with drawing, I'll start a drawing and only do the head of a person or the body and I'll lose interest in finishing it and I'll crumble it up and toss it in the garbage.
Art is what I'm talented at and I can't even force myself to do it anymore. When I tell people I don't know what career I want to do in life they are baffled because they think I'm an incredible artistic talent.
There have even been times where I've rented a movie and while renting it I'll be totally interested in watching it and I'll get home and let it sit around until it's due back to the store and sometimes I've even brought them back a week late without even watching them. That's about 8 bucks for something I never even watched. I bought a digital camera for 250 bucks and I never even use it. I have a $1600 computer that's geared towards playing the best pc games out there, but I use it to browse boring websites that I don't enjoy.
I know losing interest is a symptom of depression, but can it seriously last this long? Will I spend the rest of my life doing things I don't enjoy just to pass time? Will I spend the rest of my life in some job I got only because it would support me financially?
Well, I am seeing a psychiatrist this Friday in hopes that he'll give me some medication and CBT so I can get back the passion I had six years ago. Sometimes I blame buying a computer and browsing the net as why I became this way, but other people browse the web all the time, but still seem to have a zest for life.

If this has happened to anyone else feel free to explain your situation.

MRnomates · Intermediate User Joined: Sep 26, 2004 Posts: 114

How old are you? I used to play video games alot but not so much anymore you grow out of them. I don't really have a interest in anything anymore dunno why prob because i done stuff so many times

Flax · Posted: Tue Oct 12, 2004 6:26 pm Post subject:

Yeah, I wonder if I've just grown out of it, but even when I find new things that catch my interest I seem to dislike it very quickly. Like I got into paintball and bought equipment for around 200 bucks and have the chance to play every weekend and I don't. And when I do play I find myself standing in the field not really caring. Once I did a suicidal move to make the game more interesting. I was being shot at and instead of hiding behind trees and dodging gunfire I built up a huge berserker rage and ran straight forward shooting at everyone and bashing my way through thick foliage jumping over streams doing very bold moves. Of course I was shot out, but at least I didn't go out while hiding behind a tree forever. Then there were other times where I got shot at and I totally froze up and stayed in the same spot for twenty minutes motionless. I often didn't care if I was shot and I'd jump out and make dumb noises to attract gun fire then I'd shoot at them then I'd do it again. Lately I've been interested in making a sling weapon and hurling rocks at a target, but this sudden interest has already been lost because I don't even have the passion to start.

I'm hoping at some point I find some sort of hobby to keep me occupied, but I know whatever it may be it will not last very long or I'll give up on the idea before I even start it.

LilMissTragic · Expert User Joined: Sep 05, 2004 Posts: 803

I used to draw and write a lot, nowadays I dont seem to have the motivation, Like you I sit there in front of a blank page and absolutly nothing comes to mind to draw. I used to do photography too, mu fiance bought me a £200 camera and it just sits there. I'm not depressed, I just know know how to motivate myself.

loucat · Posted: Tue Oct 12, 2004 9:06 pm Post subject:

yeah i.m not really motivated to do anything, i can't be bothered, plus i seem to have the attention span of a 2yr old, i can never stick with anything for long

J · Guest

My motivation and attention span have been close to nil lately.

introvert · Posted: Fri Oct 15, 2004 4:38 pm Post subject:

dude I understand what it's like. I bought a digital camera, expensive pc and even a (very old) car. The camera i used about 2 times, the car was fun until it broke down and the PC i just dont find it fun playing games any more, it feels like i should be earning cash in that time instead or something - but i do realise wealth doesn't bring happiness. i have a 28 yo collegue (im 20) who is always playing games n talking about the latest games and gadgets and he has a gf and everything and is happy so I wouldnt say u "outgrow" this stuff lol. i think i need to change my job, it's depressing me (and shake this SP, gah, what a drain)