Wanting someone to love you other than your family

brightxstar · Newbie User Joined: Mar 23, 2006 Posts: 88 Location: U.S.

I've never had a boyfriend and every time i see a cute guy it makes me want to have one even more. I don't really talk to guys because I get extra nervous plus my social anxiety. It's even hard for me to talk to someone who is the same gender as me, so how can I talk to someone who is the opposite? I don't think I'm pretty or anything which I think makes me even more afraid because the majority of guys at my school want to talk to pretty or hot girls. It makes me feel really bad.

Sometimes at school, the guy I like would talk to me. One day, I helped him with something for Science class and he sort of hugged me. I was sitting down and he got up from his chair and hugged the side of me. After that hug, I felt my whole body freeze up where nothing that was attached to me could move. I just wanted to leave the room soo bad because I was so nervous. I don't remember when the last time a guy ever wanted to hug me or/and even tried to.

I just want someone to love me for who I am. Someone to hold and understand me. If I ever find just one guy who can do that, then I believe I will overcome social anxiety. It will make me more open to the world and stop me from being depressed because it will give me a reason to live.

Another thing is getting a kiss on the lips. I was never kissed on the lips in my whole life. At school this girl who had social anxiety told someone that she never had a first kiss. This got around to the class and then people were laughing a lot. I didn't find it funny at all and I hoped no one saw me just sitting there. I've never gotten a first kiss and I felt bad for myself and for the other girl.

LibertadIlusoria · Posted: Thu Mar 30, 2006 2:58 am Post subject:

I've never had a first kiss or even a boyfriend. I doubt I ever will. Crying or Very sad

_________________

Each lonely hour my heart has slept has drifted back to me.

rko74 · Intermediate User Joined: Aug 22, 2005 Posts: 258

*hugs*

Septor · Elite User Joined: Dec 15, 2005 Posts: 1033

No one ever loved me,family or other wise.It's one of those things that happen to other people and the idea seem alien to me.No one ever kiss me either.That's just life.I just have to deal with it the way it plays out. Crying or Very sad