I am a woman, and I hate to say it, but I could NEVER date a man with social anxiety, or who was anxious about anything.
I need a man to be dependable, who I can sleep next to and feel safe -- knowing that he can take care of me and can take care of himself. I do NOT want another child, or someone who I will have to constantly reassure, love and mother. I want someone who doesn't need my love and won't constantly need be to be his therapist.
Masculinity is so hard to find these days, but it's something that all of you insecure men should seek -- at least if you want to de a dependable and confident husband or boyfriend.
Why do some women take men who are shy or who have SA like it is some personal rejection towards them? Maybe those women just expect everything to happen easily in life and except everyone else to confidently reaffirming thier feelings. Can a woman find strength in herself? emotionally?
In my experience, men with social anxiety are unreliable and do not make good husbands. My best friend's father has it, and he has been a worthless, selfish father to my friend throughout the marriage. The man was divorced by his wife three years ago, and during that time has hardly reached out to the family at all.
Now, he lives like a hermit and only goes out to pick up medication and go to therapy. He has lost his job, can't pay for the house payment, and is basically living a life that is a train wreck in slow motion. What woman wants to marry a man knowing that this is what the future holds?
I don't care if my man is poor, ugly, stupid, all I want is for my man to be confident, reliable, and dependable, not self-absorbed, insecure, and selfish.
Basing all your facts on ONE man, omg, you really are shallow. I think men with Sp actually come acorss as very caring and I know damn well most of them would make great husbands. I'm an independant type of woman that doesn't need 'Taking care of'. Whats wrong with you, are you the child that needs protecting?. We are living in the day and age where we are supposed to be equals. If you need looking after then your the one with the problem.
i honestly don't care anymore.. women are dead to me.. as far as i am concerned, is that all the experiences that i have had with them have been bad, not ONE good experience with them, so how many times do you have to try before you actually have a GOOD experience?
Life is not fair, really. Im a guy from Spain and this is the first time i write something in a foreign forum. I beg your pardon for my limited use of the language.
In my short experience women have been cruel, so cruel. They dont need to be courteous and educated when they meet someone as me or you, a boy with serious vulnerabilities, insecure and afraid of them. If they can humiliate you they will do it without remorse.
I have been rejected, of course, many times. And my best weapon to clear all the pain and suffering is indifference and trying to forget all the bad moments. I know that im evolving into a more cold and dispassionate person, but this is what they want for people like me. Live your life, shut up and dont bother.
Lifeisnotfair, life is BS and you know that. Im sorry to seem desperate and depressed, but i`ll keep trying. I know there is a light at the end of the tunnel. I only hope that it wouldnt be late for me to see it.
He has lost his job, can't pay for the house payment, and is basically living a life that is a train wreck in slow motion. What woman wants to marry a man knowing that this is what the future holds?
You can see the future? Interesting. Then you can be sure you won't be hit by a car and left disabled and laid off your job later this week? Because your existence would be similar.
Quote:
I don't care if my man is poor, ugly, stupid, all I want is for my man to be confident, reliable, and dependable, not self-absorbed, insecure, and selfish.
Those things are not mutually exclusive. There are lots of confident, insecure, self-absorbed men, for instance. They're the ones girls like you complain about because you always fall for their flashy personality, and assume that such a personality automatically means that the man has depth of character.
I think you'll also find that the confident, reliable, dependable men are going to choose to marry women with much more kindness and sensitivity than you've displayed here.
Joined: Feb 11, 2004 Posts: 35 Location: United Kingdom
Posted: Tue Nov 23, 2004 12:13 am Post subject:
LilMissTragic wrote:
Basing all your facts on ONE man, omg, you really are shallow. I think men with Sp actually come acorss as very caring and I know damn well most of them would make great husbands. I'm an independant type of woman that doesn't need 'Taking care of'. Whats wrong with you, are you the child that needs protecting?. We are living in the day and age where we are supposed to be equals. If you need looking after then your the one with the problem.
that is so true
guys this is SA talking, it destroys your confidence and self worth, get CBT, get therapy, get help, get sorted out.
You'll get strength from that, postive thinking and positive appeal is what makes you attractive to people, a defeatist attitude toward women will get you nowhere.
It cant be healthy to be so obsessed about it either
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