Can't Look people in the eyes

redlady · Elite User Joined: Jul 08, 2005 Posts: 1958

I stare at people straight in the face and eyes when i am talking to them - completely oblivious to my insecurities - i do it because i think looking around and not at them would be considered rude and i can't do that. And i also don't want them to think that i am feeling embarassed or uncomfortable, lest they think less of me - weird, my actual insecurities make me ACT more confident Rolling Eyes

bipsi · Posted: Sat Apr 01, 2006 11:05 am Post subject:

I feel the same way too. I can't concentrate on what someone is saying if I look him/her into eyes. I feel uncomfortable with my parents too. Well I feel little better if I had a good sleep the night before. Sometimes I feel I have to learn how to make a proper eye contact!! It's really painful. But I'm working on it.

the_secret_me · Posted: Sun Apr 02, 2006 12:01 pm Post subject:

yeah i know the feeling. sometimes i blush if someone tries to look me in the eyes. and its really incomfortable trying to talk to someone at the same time. sometimes i can do it sometimes i cant. ive almost gotten used to looking at teachers in the eyes when they talk to me. it makes me seem more confident so they will think i know what im doing and stop questioning me.

xLonewolf · Newbie User Joined: Aug 15, 2006 Posts: 2

ARGHH I hate looking at teachers in the eyes! Especially because when they go over to help you at your desk they are like a couple of inches away from your face. In summer school my teacher kept constantly helping me since I was so bad in geometry and I barely could pay attention to anything she said because of the uncomfortable feeling. I'd glance at her eyes so she wouldnt think I was weird or rude but I kept fearing that she would sence the uncomfortable vibe from my eyes.

xkiss_me_nowx · Posted: Tue Aug 22, 2006 1:24 am Post subject:

i cant look someone in the eye unless i feel absolutly compfortable with them.. if i dont feel comfortable with them i find it hard to look them in the eye, and if i do itll only be a few seconds then ill look away

_________________
do you know how it feels,
to feel ugly all the time?
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Oli025 · Newbie User Joined: Sep 25, 2005 Posts: 54

yea...

the look in the eye thing is a problem for alot of shy /sa people

someoneelse · Newbie User Joined: Sep 27, 2006 Posts: 36

I can almost pin point when I started to fine it hard to look at people in the eye. I was young and had the habit of really staring at people I found interesting. I did it so much that I became self-conscious of it and after that I looked away. I can look people in the eye now though I do it sporadically and look away at times. I have found that many people have there own way of how long they hold your eye. This has helped me not be overly concerned about holding eye contact all the time. I sort of respond to the other person. If the other person likes to hold eye contact while I am talking with them I do and if the person looks around constantly I do not mind. It is funny once I stopped thinking about it I was better at it. There are still people I have difficulity with eye contact like attractive women but I get by.

Eyes · Newbie User Joined: Nov 27, 2006 Posts: 1

I'm the same. It first started in h.s. All of a sudden, I wasn't able to look at certain people in the eyes anymore. My stare scared them and they couldn't look at me. It really only happens around people that I'm nervous around, especially guys that I may like. Anyway, is there professional help out there? Medication?

snipes · Newbie User Joined: Apr 02, 2008 Posts: 8

Ive had this problem for ten years. It started after taking a load of speed and smoking canabis, something just went click in my head. Whats amazing to me is, I thought until now after reading some of the posts, that there was little or nobody else who had the same problem. I seem to have a mixture of all the different ways of remedying the problem I have read on here. To be honest I find a good release is having a good few beers, not drinking too fast, or you just get pissed, and then I tend to feel more confident, obviously this is not a perminent solution!!!! So then I ask the question, If you have ultimate confidence you will have no fear of looking at people or about how they think of you. I wish I had the answer of finding this confidence. I have lost alot of friends due to this, so I feel for you all!!!! However, I do find repeating to my self to be more confident when looking at people helps abit. P.S sorry about the spelling im shit at it! Shocked

Infected_2 · Newbie User Joined: Mar 17, 2008 Posts: 7

i used to be terrified of eye contact. and for some odd reason, it doesn't bother me all that much anymore. i can do weird shit with my eyes that'll make anyone look away though, and i usually get a laugh out of it. if not, i just smile and let the person know i'm just fucking with them... and somehow, that's made me a lot less afraid to share regular ass eye contact as well.