feels like my life is falling apart

neddy

I'm having one of them days today. The depression is really starting to set in now, I can no longer handle my life the way it is now, it is so empty. I'm very shy and introverted which only makes my problem worse. I have looked for a support group where I live but have been unable to find one, I know I need to find a good counsellor to help get me back on track but find that they are too expensive, in most cases you need to get a referral but I'm really struggling with the idea that I have to go to a Dr I don't know and tell them how I am feeling, the last one only wanted to put me on medication and told me the problem would then go away. It didn't only made me feel spaced out. Has anyone got any suggestions of what I can do. I live in a small place which has only got just under 100 000 people.

Johno · Posted: Sun Mar 07, 2004 1:07 pm Post subject: Support Groups

Hi Neddy,

Hope you are feeling better.
There isn't a lot of support available in Adelaide, let alone Darwin. I know Grow offers support for people with depression etc. They are located in Casuarina Plaza (0 Cool

8945 4096 www.growint.org.au/nt.htm. I am thinking about travelling to Melbourne in April to do a weekend workshop on Social phobia. There seems to be a lot more support in Melbourne and Sydney.
all the best
john

Orlando · Posted: Tue Mar 09, 2004 2:29 am Post subject:

Hi Neddy,

Gee, I hope you're feeling better. I'm from America so I really can't do much for you but offer support. Hang-in-there. I feel your pain too.

_________________
-Orl

Jess333

It's okay Neddy. We all have those days. I had one of those days yesterday. I just couldn't seem to feel comfortable no matter what i did. But it's okay, today is a new day and I had a great day at work. I was able to focus my thoughts successfully all day and my mood was great all day and I feel positive and in a great mood now, i feel at peace.

If you can't afford a psych Neddy then do what I did, you could try to be your own councelor. No psych helped me, I helped myself. I mean, I am studying to be a psychologist and this stuff kind of comes natural to me, but you can do it too, you just have to realize what is CAUSING the sa, so you can work on fixing it.

You have to see this as a challenge. You have to feel so low that you want to beat this social anxiety and depression crap. You have to feel and be willing to do anything to overcome it. Depression and SA are paralyzing and I couldn't take it anymore, something had to be done. So i read a few books and realized that my self-esteem was really low and has been for a very long time. And I realized that my thoguht patterns were negatively entrenched and have been. I had NO IDEA why i was feeling this weird feeling of SA in front of people. I thought my brain chemicals were off, I thought I was diseased, i felt so alone..and I what I didn't realized was that I learned to feel this way about myself and the world around me and THAT is what caused my nervous ness in front of other people. I became very self-conscious..and now i'm slowly weening myself from being so anxious and self conscious.

But you have to take these steps!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I can't express that enough. One of doctors' biggest complaints about their work is that they SEE what is wrong and they tell the patient/client to do what they need to do to cure it and the patient/client don't do it and they don't get better. There's a saying and that is "you can lead a horse to the watering hold but you can't make him drink". Psychologists can tell you all day what you need to do, but iit is up to YOU to change yourself. No psych is going to change you. It's your footwork and willpower.

Sometimes you feel this initial good feeling JUST by going to a psych..well that feeling is temporary. When it all comes down to it, you haven't changed your self image..so after that initial feeling fades away you will find yourself depressed and anxious again. It is important to be PROACTIVE in your own recovery!!!!!!!!!!!! Otherwise you will never change and you always will feel this way..and let someone who knows from experience tell you, that recovery is POSSIBLE. And if you are proactive with your recovery and work hard..mental work ,disciplining yourself and controlling your thoughts you will probably see fast results like i did.

So, you've got now..you've got today..What's it going to be?

Reads: "The Feeling Good Handbook: Dr David Burns" read this first

Then read and do the self-help program "Choosing the Happiness Habit" by Pam Golden

Start doing the footwork. You'll see results if you control yourself and focus your thoughts, trust me.

neddy · Posted: Sat Mar 13, 2004 7:33 am Post subject:

I'm feeling alot better now, I have found that since I have found this site I am feeling alot more positive, just knowing what other people have been through and how they have helped themselfs has helped. I know there is hope out there and I am the only person who can change the way I feel, I am at my lowest now, have had enough now i am prepared to do anything to overcome it. I still can't go out and meet people or talk to strangers but the day will come when I just take the chance and do it anyway, the first couple of times will be the hardest but it will get easier. one day at a time

Orlando · Posted: Sat Mar 13, 2004 7:41 am Post subject:

Good for you!
You inspire me to work harder on my Social Phobia! Very Happy

Thanks!

_________________
-Orl