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Social Phobia World :: View topic - 2 things that have/are helping me
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2 things that have/are helping me

 
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Scottish_Player
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Joined: Feb 02, 2005
Posts: 930
Location: United Kingdom

PostPosted: Sat Jan 27, 2007 10:21 pm    Post subject: 2 things that have/are helping me Reply with quote

I know alot of people are sensative on this site so please take no offence of what iam about to say.

I've been on this site a few years now and over that time ive noticed that the negative posts get way more attention than the positive ones, people come on and offer positive advice that is real good yet they get few replies, yet someone comes on and complains that they cant do this and they cant do that and they then get 20 replies from people saying "yeh iam the same i cant do that". This in my opinion dosent help in over coming this illness. Its as if alot of people on here like to feel like this and like complaining and wont do anything about it, they try something for a weeks and then give up saying that it dosent work, there is no magic cure, it takes time and commitment, iam doing stuff that i would never have dreamed of a year and a half ago and all i have done is cange my way of thinking.

1 - I just want to offer my advice on what has helped me get a little bit of a life for myself, the one main thing that has really helped is POSITIVE thinking, no matter how bad somthing goes (within reason) try to see the positive in it and use it as a learning curve.

2 - Also having goals and ambitions is another help, having somthing to work towards and acheive helps me and gives me a reason to get up in the morning and live another day.

That is the 2 main things briefly, without going on about it too much i just want to mention a song that made me realise it, the song is called "CHANGE" by a band called "BLIND MELON"


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joshueg
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Joined: Nov 04, 2005
Posts: 142
Location: Spain

PostPosted: Sat Feb 10, 2007 11:43 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hi, Scottish_Player!,
i agree you when you say that the attitude must be positive, of course it has to, otherwise it iwould be much more difficult to get over the anxiety.
Sometimes i am positive, but others it is very hard for me to feel that way.
But i am making efforts in order to think positively about a situation or a problem and many times i feel better.
It is true too that one has to have some reachable goals.
In order to motivate himself/herself.
Well, thanks, Scottish.player, for your advices.
See you!!

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jayo
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Joined: Jun 30, 2006
Posts: 118
Location: Ireland

PostPosted: Sat Feb 10, 2007 12:47 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Completely agree with this!

When constructive advice is offered it tends to be scoffed at.

People tend to say you don't know my problems - no wonder
they're left in the rut of social phobia!

I find subliminal messaging discs, positive imagery and courses
to be very helpful in helping me cope with this anxiety.

I'm currently doing a course in CBT and live on every word.

Putting these things into practice has helped me become more
self assured, confident, assertive and place far less value on
other peoples opinions of me in any situation.


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eggbe4thechicken
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Joined: Feb 18, 2007
Posts: 58
Location: England, Warks

PostPosted: Wed Feb 28, 2007 11:05 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I see what you are getting at, but I like to come onto this site to know that i am not alone in how i am feeling. It helps to know that others have the same fears, and worries as I do. Also writing things down, that people you don't know will read, and give feedback, positive or agreeing helps so much.
As an aside, I am going to the cinema with some friends tomorrow! Haven't been out in about 2 months, so hopefully all will go smoothly Smile *crosses fingers*


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cherish
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Joined: Mar 29, 2006
Posts: 102

PostPosted: Thu Mar 01, 2007 2:06 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

that's a great song, blind melon's a great band. I think when people are ready for it they'll make a change. It also takes time to get over the angry and depressed point, but the more times you pull yourself out of it and try seeing things differently the easier it gets and the more you just naturally do it. I takes realizations and time to sulk a bit before you start to do something about it.

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pinkputter
Intermediate User
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Joined: Aug 09, 2006
Posts: 129

PostPosted: Thu Mar 01, 2007 4:35 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hey totally true!!!

The whole reason why we have this in the first place are irrational thoughts (which are all negative) If you truly want to over come it, think positive things.

Yes it is nice to have reassurance but is hearing negative thoughts, then writing negative thoughts really assurance?

Everyone IS going through the same thing, so i think the most productive way to feeling better is to give positive posts ... we can all relate. It doesnt need to be negative for us to relate to them. -That is the very thing we're trying to overcome, being negative.

If you dont have another place to share these negative feelings, dont feel like you cant say them on here. But do yourself and everyone else a favor and if you share something negative, think of ways to overcome that or a positive thought.

Anyway, just a suggestion. And very true Scottish player

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Cedeejay
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Joined: Feb 12, 2007
Posts: 21

PostPosted: Thu Mar 01, 2007 5:36 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Agreed. That should be the place where people are defeating these toughts to start living, serves nothing to complain, we all gotta get back on track and now, cause life is to short to lose it fearing, doubting or whatsoever

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