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Social Phobia World :: View topic - Great difficulties with non-verbal eye contact
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Great difficulties with non-verbal eye contact
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wooaah
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Joined: Apr 24, 2008
Posts: 26

PostPosted: Thu Apr 24, 2008 3:22 am    Post subject: Re: eye contact Reply with quote

theman wrote:
It might sound silly, but here's one method that many people find helpful.

Pick a few spots on their face. Usually the eyes, nose, and mouth do fine. Cycle your gaze between them.

So start out looking at their eyes, give it 3 seconds, then move to their mouth, 3 seconds, then to the bridge of their nose, 3 seconds, right eye, 3, mouth, 3, left eye, 3, etc.

Jumble it up so you're not just going in a circle, and every couple cycles or so look down or to the side for 3. Also, it doesn't have to be 3 seconds. Once you get comfortable you can do more or less time on any one spot. You can practice in front of a mirror.


ooo i like this suggestion.
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scorpion
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Joined: Feb 24, 2008
Posts: 102
Location: MARS, dont came after me

PostPosted: Mon Apr 28, 2008 5:26 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I use to feel extremely uncomfortable looking people in the eyes, and I still do in a certain way.
But recently I have found out that loking people in the eyes makes most of them as unconfrotable as me or even more, because I know I am like that because of the APD.
So what do I do now? I look people in the eyes and try to maintain contact until the other person looks away, surprisingly I discovered that the other person often breaks contact before me and that makes me feel more secure.
Knowing that there was a reason for me to do certain things (APD) as helped me to start doing the oposite, its still small stuff but its a start.
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princess_haru
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Joined: Apr 17, 2008
Posts: 99
Location: England

PostPosted: Mon Apr 28, 2008 6:23 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I find eye contact awkward - I always feel as though I'm either staring and making people feel uncomfortable, or looking away and appearing uninterested and rude. It's so hard to find the right balance of looking at/away from people.

Also, I get paranoid about my facial expressions - am I glaring at them, smiling too much, looking snooty and bored?! I sometimes wish there was a mirror behind the person I'm talking to so that I could check how I'm coming across! Vain? No, just paranoid... Confused
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