Too shy to say hi

lostboi · Intermediate User Joined: Nov 19, 2005 Posts: 137

I went to the local taco shop the other day and there was a really cute sort of goth girl there. she smiled at me and I smiled back sort of a nervous smile i guess but then i just turned around it was like I couldn't look her in the eyes. Like I assumed she was better than me or to good for me or something..and I just turned and hid out of her view. I wanted so badly to say hi. It makes me so mad at my self. But then I don't even know if I'm all that attractive maybe she wasn't even smiling at me. Maybe I was just fooling my self. How many times in my life does this have to happen before I have the will to actually say something!? I feel like such a loser. Does this happen to anyone else? *sigh*

Chilling__Echo · Posted: Tue Dec 06, 2005 6:57 pm Post subject:

don't beat yourself up about it. even your average person would probably be embarrassed or bashful. if she smiled at you first, she's proabably a nice person and wouldn't judge you so harshly.

but you did smile back! that's a plus, alot of times i can't even manage that because i'm so taken off guard. she probably feels bad for not then going up and talking to you since she was the one that initiated the smile.

give yourself a break, there's others - you're still getting comfortable with yourself. be confident! look at everyone around you next time you're in public and see that you're no different from them. what makes them better than you? nothing. you're just as capable and this illness doesn' have to ruin you.

cheer up, you've learned and you'll be better for it next time (((hugs))) Very Happy

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allanboy · Intermediate User Joined: Aug 20, 2005 Posts: 297

MMy godd, this kind of situation sucks. Happened to me lots, not only to girls but everyone else, i take a look at this person, i look to some kind of super person, that almost have to bow my head or start lying to kind of, at least gets him/her to look at me.
Hmm, some time since something like this happened. Looks like self steem helps you in this kind of situation.

But, it´s times like these that you gotta throw everything in the air and say at least a hi. Well, if you´ve done it right, you kinda get addicted to it, and saying hi wont be that much of a pain.

young · Expert User Joined: Sep 23, 2005 Posts: 602

look at it this way. you say hi. she say's hi.. she doesn't... well you didn't really lose anything.

Boundless · Expert User Joined: Aug 20, 2005 Posts: 615 Location: UK

Dont worry about it,so many people have that problem(including me),its annoying yes but when your ready you will be able to do that sort of thing.

young · Expert User Joined: Sep 23, 2005 Posts: 602

oh and for 50 bucks an hour. I'll be your wing man and talk you up to talking to that special girl. Even tell you what to say.

blight · Posted: Wed Dec 07, 2005 4:24 am Post subject:

I think you described that type of situation exactly like everyone else experiences it. Next time you should go for it. I don't do it often myself (really at all actually) but one time I actually did literally FORCE myself into talking to this girl who was really good looking.. I had worked myself up to it for a while and knew exactly when I was going to see her and then against all my instincts PHYSICALLY FORCED myself into approaching her. It went absolutely horribly. I'm not kidding it was such as disaster I may never forget it.

The good news is she agreed to get together sometime despite what a complete pathetic idiot I was being. And then after that we hung out again, and then again..and she ended up being one of my only girlfriends to date. So I always tell remember that maybe it will be worth it even if the first impression is worse than your worst nightmare.

young · Expert User Joined: Sep 23, 2005 Posts: 602

young · Expert User Joined: Sep 23, 2005 Posts: 602

lostboi · Intermediate User Joined: Nov 19, 2005 Posts: 137

Damn young. I'm so pathetically desperate to be able to talk to people $50.00 an hour seems almost reasonable. Ughh I need to get my life handled. I simply know that so many great opportunities have probably been lost due to my fear and shyness. It makes me so angry and frustrated. Mad

Thanks eveyone for all of your comments and suggestions. I guess I just need to learn to bite the bullet.... Even if it goes off in my mouth..