Joined: Jul 13, 2004 Posts: 19 Location: United Kingdom
Posted: Tue Jul 13, 2004 9:47 pm Post subject:
I don't want you to think im being bitter im not it just made me see the irony of seeking help for being nervous and shy in a forum for shy people I hope I've not upset anyone thats not what I intended, Im glad I've found people with similar problems to me. sorry
You know, it REALLY IS a HORRID pity that we can't say anything without freaking out or 'second guessing' about how people will accept it.
You are being way too social phobic kc69! Maybe I 'read' posts incorrectly... but you seem like a very nice person and I don't see one thing you wrote any where that should have offended anyone!
Hey.... Since we SP's have difficulties finding and keeping jobs, I just thought of a way to make some $$$$.... by selling tickets to oodles of strangers to our homes for a certain date and time to witness a panic attack! With all those strangers, we'd be certain to have one (hmmmm and wouldn't it just be the first time we DIDN'T!?!?!).. anyway, I figure something like that is worth at least $35 a pop, so for that amount per head, I can fake it once, or twice... -ell, maybe 3 or MORE times!
Maybe we could get jobs at paint shops using the pitch that we'd save the shop money on paint mixers cuz every time a stranger ordered some paint, we'd be shaking and mix it?
That just craked me up! It made me think of something funny. (well to another social phob that is) I went to a gathering of family a few weeks ago, i found that 1/2 my family had this sa problem. We we're all there together (it was a respect thing) and for some reason, i said how much i missed my family which led to finding out WHY we never get together. We ended up laughing because we found that we all were blessed with this sa so we decided to get together again. the funny part was, we absolutly didnt need to fear it because we KNEW not one of us would show up!! Which gave us all a good laugh, and oddly, a bit of comfort knowing we wouldnt be "pressed" to go out somewhere. Well, dont know if i made that understandable, but it was funny at the time.
Hiya Scardecat!
I 'pictured" your family gathering and all the events taking place splendidly! You did a GREAT job at explaining it and giving me some giggles, so BIG thumbs up.
See... your SP had you thinking that you may not have explained your post right or that someone else might not see any humor in it... gosh, why do we give such intense thought to every move we make. Why do we care TOO MUCH? sigh
Your story gave me a great idea! I am going to throw a HUGE party and invite all the social phobic--shy people I know!! Can you imagine the $$ I am going to save on refreshments? Whoo Hoo! The downfall is that along with the SP, I am OC as well, so I'll probably STILL be counting everything I'll need over and over and over and over.
and over....
and over ... arggggh!
You know, I hate having OCD just as much as the Social Anxiety!! The only nice thing about it is that I waste so much time counting things and reading signs backwards, etc., that I don't have as much time to be bored and depressed being social phobic. I still AM bored and DEPRESSED, I just don't think about it as much when I'm counting, or making my plans to go to the store in specific detail, down to the every even minor detail, even where I will park before I get there! Arggggggh!!
Glad you understood and yep, it's somethen how we always feel misunderstood BUT!!!! oh my gosh, im laughing with tears at your other comments!!!! That is the funniest thing ever! It's very like what we talked about at our "gathering" lol. I cant believe how funny we are in one way, and how yucky sad we are in another. I too am oc. Mine seem to change though. Do you stick with the counting thing? Now that OC thing is something i'v just found about (that i have) too so your discription also just made me chuckle!! I honestly am finally finding myself and my oddities quite amusing to myself. I just thought them scarry ALL my life, and now that i understand them, it's not tooooooooo bad. Well, panic attacks are awful, and i wish i could quit pushing my eyebrows up with my fingers, touching between my eyebrows, pushing on my chin, and twisting my hands all up, or feelilng smooth things....dang, mabie it is still tooooooooo bad......lol, yuck! Anyway, when im not hurting from it, I am ok Thanks for the huge laughs! very comforting isnt it just having someone else be writing such feelings you feel.........
Hi again Scardecat! I'm glad I gave you some laughs, I really think it helps to laugh! You should have seen what I replied the first time that SPW decided to EAT~~~ seriously! The site said 'session timed out" and ate my reply! Geeez... I thought I was a habitual muncher!!! I tried everything I could think of to get the post BACK... but it must have been digested and too, too late. I think the site should give me a little slack! After all, I DO NEED to count things in between typing and keep going through 'things' in my head, just my 'head' because there isn't any MIND enclosed inside there, just a mumbo jumbo of useless stored information!
Oh no, it's not always just the counting! I do all sorts of assinine things, & people blame it on my birth sign (Virgo) (organized neat freak) NOT! But I let them go on, they can deal with that much better than the OCD!
I VERY well aware the things I do are totally useless, assinine & ridiculous, but I CAN NOT STOP doing them, so it is way better to laugh than get frustrated! I'm like you, I will call myself names in my head for doing OC 'things' like: (you COMPLETE ARSEHOLE!!) but I'll be laughing about it all the while! And your are so right, since I found out there are reasons for it and I'm not the only freak in existance, it does make it easier and I can & DO laugh about it! It's way more than obvious I'm not, or "it's" NOT going to change, so accepting it and laughing about it is FAR BETTER than feeling insane and hopeless!
If I have an appointment to go to, and it doesn't even have to be something IMPORTANT... could even just be lunch with my cousin, I have to go over and over in my head what I will WEAR... I'll even get it all out of the closet or dresser down to even the jewelry and have it all ready (as if I'll need to DRESS FAST, like it's a crisis situation!!!) .... ahhhh, relief at last, I can SLEEP---- but alas, the day arrives and I change everything I PLANNED on wearing around AT LEAST 20 times before going right the -ell back to the original things I went with the night before. arghhhhhhhhh
Yep Yep, sux to be us, but it IS funny as -ell! Just keep laughing Scarde, as long as we are laughing, we are gonna make it!!
Hope this makes it through okay... I think I hear SPW's stomach rumbling!
Hi again Scardecat! I'm glad I gave you some laughs, I really think it helps to laugh! You should have seen what I replied the first time that SPW decided to EAT~~~ seriously! The site said 'session timed out" and ate my reply! Geeez... I thought I was a habitual muncher!!! I tried everything I could think of to get the post BACK... but it must have been digested and too, too late. I think the site should give me a little slack! After all, I DO NEED to count things in between typing and keep going through 'things' in my head, just my 'head' because there isn't any MIND enclosed inside there, just a mumbo jumbo of useless stored information!
Oh no, it's not always just the counting! I do all sorts of assinine things, & people blame it on my birth sign (Virgo) (organized neat freak) NOT! But I let them go on, they can deal with that much better than the OCD!
I VERY well aware the things I do are totally useless, assinine & ridiculous, but I CAN NOT STOP doing them, so it is way better to laugh than get frustrated! I'm like you, I will call myself names in my head for doing OC 'things' like: (you COMPLETE ARSEHOLE!!) but I'll be laughing about it all the while! And your are so right, since I found out there are reasons for it and I'm not the only freak in existance, it does make it easier and I can & DO laugh about it! It's way more than obvious I'm not, or "it's" NOT going to change, so accepting it and laughing about it is FAR BETTER than feeling insane and hopeless!
If I have an appointment to go to, and it doesn't even have to be something IMPORTANT... could even just be lunch with my cousin, I have to go over and over in my head what I will WEAR... I'll even get it all out of the closet or dresser down to even the jewelry and have it all ready (as if I'll need to DRESS FAST, like it's a crisis situation!!!) .... ahhhh, relief at last, I can SLEEP---- but alas, the day arrives and I change everything I PLANNED on wearing around AT LEAST 20 times before going right the -ell back to the original things I went with the night before. arghhhhhhhhh
Yep Yep, sux to be us, but it IS funny as -ell! Just keep laughing Scarde, as long as we are laughing, we are gonna make it!!
Hope this makes it through okay... I think I hear SPW's stomach rumbling!
Hey! I prepared for the snack attacking SPW and SAVED my post... heh heh heh, SEE, it even PAYS to be OC sometimes..... so anyway, if there ends up being TWO posts here, that's WHY!
oh Scardecat! Its OCD-ME again back with one of MANY after thoughts.. but you are right, it is awesome getting these feelings out, esp. with someone that can realte!
I was thinking of one of my WORST OC~~~ermmmmm~~~habits (is THAT what they are?) anyway:::: Ahhhhhhh.... 'things' needed at the store......
Chapter 1
I write down what I need (but mostly what I WANT ) on more than just ONE piece of paper, note pad, etc. ) YOU KNOW, just in case one of them gets lost.... but I will only take the bother to make 'additions' to ONE of the notes, & I'll forget WHICH BLUDDY one I wrote the additions on and come back home WITHOUT them anyway! ARGGGGGH!
Chapter 2
I've got the needed and wanted 'notes' everwhere.... in all of my pockets, all over my apt. & in my car.... I get to the store and the other shoppers think I have 'criiters' or poison ivy!!!! (A phobic's dream come true, bringing all that attention to your OWN SELF! whoo hoo!) There I am~~~~ feeling/searching~~~going through each pocket, etc. and NOT one F-ing note to be found, leave the store~~~ check my car, still none!!! I remember one thing from one of the notes, MAYBE, yay.... resort to getting the one item and upon arrival back home, find at least 4 of the notes in various rooms of my apt.
Chapter 3 The Infamous Notes
These notes MUST be PERFECT (& again, "WHY" is far beyond my comprehension! But they simply MUST BE!!) Abbreviations are acceptable, but outside of THAT, the items must be VERY neat, not just beautifully legible, but 'fancy' if possible, if even one error occurs (YIKES!! Don't use INK... even though ink is so much more fancy and legible ) and that includes the item NOT being 'fancy', the note MUST BE destroyed and a new one started.
After appearing like a flea ridden chimp & sometimes being blessed with a panic attack.... and STILL not finding any of the infamous notes, I've began/rewritten new ones fro the next trip from the crumbled up, 'destroyed' ones in the trash can!
The End (for now )
This icon is supposed to be "SHOCKED" ~~ now, does this icon look shocked to you? It reminds[u] me[/u] MORE of a studious, intelligent geek type icon.
oh my gosh you killing me.....im about screaming yelling to my hubby that i've found someone JUST LIKE ME!!!! and laughing all the while. We were just now JUST NOW talking about how he has to sit in his seat waiting for me to enter the car before he'll even get out of his seat, knowing full well there will be another "list to write" or something to pick up, or some adjusting of some sort to do before we finally get out of the house...This is just so funny and the cloths thing is hystaricle (sp) cause im really just an ole hippy,,,heck, "antique" hippy more like, so i'd think my cloths would not be important....But see, I either cannot stand a certain color, or just cant put on something that is nice looking, or then another time not perfect to how i feel, and oh my gosh,,,other times it's how they feel on me that particular day...smoothe, soft etc..............yuck again!!!!!! oops,,,hubby hungry,,,more later.....
SCARDECAT!! Sweetie!! I got GOOSEBUMPS, this is so bluddy ironic!!! I am the antique hippy type as well!! OMGawsh!! HONEST, freaking to GAWSH....... truth IS... I can't even remember the LAST TIME I wore a DRESS, or SKIRT, and FORGET pantyhose! I loathe them.... it's the consistancy of them... BLACHHHH! Why or HOW can I put something on my legs that stick to the callouses and chipped nails on my hands?!?! And I am not into silk either! That's what makes my pre-engagement 'clothing ritual' even MORE ASSININE!!! It's either sandals or cotton socks~~BUT~~the color of the socks MUST match my carpenter jeans or tee shirt/blouse, and if I put a barette in my hair, it MUST be color co-ordinated TOO! And, the snadls MUST match my pocketbook (if I'm bothering with one) Worse possible case senario.... no clean colored socks that match!! THEN~~ my entire decision on what I am wearing needs to be reorganized!
Leaving to go anywhere.... SAME AS YOU TO A "T"!!! I'm finally out the door, -ell NO I'm NOT, I am compelled by the forces that I can't quite decide are 'my nature' or not~~ to go back inside (of course this is after checking to make certain I locked the door and so PROUD that I did, just as proud as I was the other 2 or 3 times I checked it PRIOR to the e-entry!! After re-entery, the answering machine is checked~~of course it's bluddy ON, I didn't touch the freaking thing since the LAST TIME-- but I still need to check it!! Now, I look at myself~~AGAIN~~and make certain everything is color co-ordinated, and.... did I turn OFF all the appliances I didn't even TURN ON in the FIRST PLACE? What time is it? Ahhhh, yay! Still have time to 'get there', I know because I have a bluddy clock in EVERY ROOM, some of the rooms have 3!! Did I feed my pets? Yes, they are fed and have water.... I can leave now, assured, OR~~~CAN I? Better think it all THROUGH THOROUGHLY!!
-ell, it isn't just the panic attacks that keep me housebound! It takes me for-freaking-ever to get going anywhere! Even after I checked, re-checked, & triple checked all the stuff, I'm STILL THINKING ABOUT IT driving into the distance!
Oh Scardecat! I am looking forward to YOUR next response as well!
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Maybe I 'read' posts incorrectly... but you seem like a very nice person and I don't see one thing you wrote any where that should have offended 
Your story gave me a great idea! I am going to throw a HUGE party and invite all the social phobic--shy people I know!! Can you imagine the $$ I am going to save on refreshments? Whoo Hoo! The downfall is that along with the SP, I am OC as well, so I'll probably STILL be counting everything I'll need over and over and over and over.
resort to getting the one item and upon arrival back home, find at least 4 of the notes in various rooms of my apt. 
now, does this icon look shocked to you? It reminds