Posted: Sat Dec 18, 2004 10:33 pm Post subject: made some progress
last night i made a massive effort and went with my best mate to meet up with dozens of his mates at a club.
If id just gone, and then left straight away, i would have still been happy with myself because i made that first step, made the effort, got dressed, and went. But thats not what happened, i had a good time aswell and i did really well with keeping my sp well and truly in check. Now the trick is always that same, i did this and i feel great, but this is just the big first step, now i have to back it up with repeatedly going out to places like this over and over again over the next month or so, now that im confident and i can, otherwise ill go back to were i started.
picked up this really nice chick aswell. parkia x maori (for all you other side of the world people, that means white nz x dark nz) she an air hostess she msg'd me after the club when i was on my way home (she'd left earlier than me aswell) saying if i wanted to go crash at her house im welcome hehe. i said no ! and it wasnt nothing to do with sp either i said that (in a nice, sugar coated, flirty way) because iv got enough experience to have learned you have to play hard to get with girls, or else they tire of you quickly. So i might call her tomorrow, hopefully its a nice day, cause she lives in a beach suburb, that would be a perfect place to take her
anyway so yer now its on to trying to be consistent and get out there a few more times over the immediate future so i can break this thing ... wish me luck !
edit : sometimes when im taking on a big challenge like this, i seem to come up with certain mantras on the fly as im trying to ready myself up before i get there right .... last nights was
"be yourself, i am who i am and im proud of it"
and
"look at the big picture, tonight is just a hump i have to get over to get there"
and they worked for me see stupid crappy catch frases are ok after all
Last edited by tommy_15 on Sat Dec 18, 2004 10:38 pm; edited 1 time in total
Joined: Dec 14, 2004 Posts: 60 Location: United Kingdom
Posted: Sat Dec 18, 2004 11:40 pm Post subject:
it will only get harder if he thinks negativley he has already done the hardest part by going out that first time. He should be proud of himself he now knows in his mind that he has done it once and should take confidence from it.
thanks guys. No i definetly think it will get easier no doubt about it. The only way it might get harder again is if i dont make lots of efforts to go out now that i am feeling confident. Otherwise i think it will be fine, obviously still challenging, but i will be ok. Its like a learning expereince and every time i socialise properly i learn new skills, have more experiences, and confidence goes up more.
i just remembered though with that girl, im such a spastic ! i probly should 'ave gone last night after all, cause i just remembered im flying upstate tomorrow morning arrggh. What i might do is i might call her up tonight just so i can touch base, and ill ask her what she's doing nye, i might come down back a bit early and see her then.
Im not sure what im doing nye yet, if i'm going to go further upstate with some friends (theres a crazy hippy drugged up party town called byron bay) or if im going to fly back down to syd and do something there, or if im going to stay put and be a loser and do nothing
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she msg'd me after the club when i was on my way home (she'd left earlier than me aswell) saying if i wanted to go crash at her house im welcome hehe. i said no ! and it wasnt nothing to do with sp either 
