Posted: Tue Apr 01, 2008 12:08 pm Post subject: hello
Hey, my name is Paul. I just remembered that I signed up for this site about 7 years ago but I guess I got distracted from it lol. I'm surprised I could still remember my password.
I've had social phobia for basically as long as I can remember but I was diagnosed at the age of 15. I'm 22 now and since then my self esteem has improved a great deal but my anxiety has gotten much more severe. I've had to quit a job and drop out of university thanks to it and I've never been in a relationship. I haven't had any friends for three years now and I only leave the house when necessary. Therapy and medication haven't helped much at all. I rarely feel motivated to try to improve but I hate my life the way it is. I think I tend to distract myself from my problems, mainly through the use of the internet. My mood is generally "ok" but I have occasional episodes of bad depression due to loneliness and the envy I feel towards others that are doing better than me.
I'm not all doom and gloom though. I'm very reserved but over time I've managed to make a few online friends with from another social anxiety site and I feel quite comfortable around them and can make jokes etc. I try my best to be a good person despite my imperfections and I don't betray people who place their trust in me. That's something that I can feel a little bit proud of at least.
I'm not really sure what to expect here. Maybe just a little bit of relief from boredom.
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