Facial blushing is the worst pain in life...

wonderlife · Newbie User Joined: Aug 06, 2008 Posts: 4 Location: Russia

Hi all,
I am new new in this site.

Hereby, i would like to express how painfull it is to have facial blushing.

I am 30 yo guy with a very profound backrgound. I am educated, good natured, and even wealthy person in this life. I have my family, wife and 2 kids. But all above 'must-feel-happy' features can not help me fighting with so painfull shyness and facial blusing.

The problem is that i loose my control in social situations. Usually, I cause my shynes mainly myself. The thing is sometimes i do nut blush at all and even can make a very good jokes with people. I feel even they never think that i am a blusher.

But sometimes even in a very mild situations this social phobia just attacks me and i feel inside, 'or please no one talk to me otherwise i go flush to death ...and it happens".

Example 1:

I am waiting in front of reception to enter to the boss's cabinet. There are 3 of us - me, a secretary and the other colleage. We are just talking in low voice in front of reception with mild smiles and kiddings.

Suddenly, my heart starts beating and i start nervous out of blue, not from colleages yet. Then my colleage just looks at me and keep on just talking and smiling as a natural. But, somehow, I feel hot in my face. Loose consious and control, somehow try not to show it, but... Sad

.

Then the guy just remarks to secretary that my face is red. My mouse is shut. I want to run away or just disappear. .. My redface... well i think tomato is more bright than my face. Embarassed

The thing if i am alone i could say why i blush? there is no reason. Or say I could laugh back? However, how come.. if you loose your control....

Example 2:

I need to have a deal with another girl in the office. But whenever, i see that girl even if i had not blushed all the day, talking to many people, I blush to death contacting to her. I feel she is inside me and reads my mind. However, i have no any bad intention toward her..

Overall...
I blush almost all the time if one flatters me..
I mostly blush among the acquaitant people rather than new people.
I loose contol and blush to ask a favor from my boss if he/she is strict.
Finally, i blush whenever i pre-feel that i would blush..boosting it worse...

Sometimes, i even cry inside Crying or Very sad

and feel so blue why such a nice person, so talanted, good human natured 'man' has to be so down. If only there would not be such 'illness' he could reach a very high positions in real life and help a lot to people.

Sorry, if i made you bored by my sad story, but i thought it would help some people who have the similar experience..Because during 30 years of my life i have not met any people who could have the problem to my level...

Lexmark · Posted: Wed Aug 06, 2008 2:37 pm Post subject:

Hmm your lucky if it effects you in just a few situations
its effects every aspect of all my life even though most of the time i am smarter and better looking hehe Very Happy

wonderlife · Newbie User Joined: Aug 06, 2008 Posts: 4 Location: Russia

Lexmark,
Thank you for your back post.

Can you brief in what like situations you may have this sort of attack?
Anyaway, have a good time!!!

Lexmark · Posted: Wed Aug 06, 2008 5:37 pm Post subject:

Think i get it worse than you but i understand what you are saying
Even when i saw you reply to my post i think i had a minor blushing
I thought about it and 2day i 3 blushing situations
I dont want to go into it but do you know why you get it ? coz i have no idea

fpu89 · Newbie User Joined: Mar 20, 2008 Posts: 4

It's incredible how blushing, changing of color on the face, can be so debilitating. Knowing that certain people go through life, with great success, despite severe physical handicaps, makes my blushing problem seems so small. I will never allow it to take total control of me though it changes my behavior in many situations. Other people have been against much greater odds than myself and they're ok. I try to think about that as much as i can.

Drew · Posted: Wed Aug 06, 2008 8:38 pm Post subject:

Facial blushing is something that I've been trying to overcome my entire life. Without exaggeration, I would say that my blushing problem is responsible for the meager existence I now find myself in. It's one thing to be the shyest person in a room, but my blushing problem, more or less, broadcasts my condition to the entire world.

I can say with confidence, that I have missed out on many opportunities in life because I was so afraid of people seeing my insane blushing problem. Other than my face turning red, I was usually okay to handle many social situations, career responsibilities, and romantic encounters.

To me, blushing and is one of the most embarrassing things that can happen around other people - and it's something that I try to avoid at all costs. The problem is (and any social anxiety sufferer will likely agree), the harder I try to stop myself from blushing, the worse it gets.

Have you ever had your face turn crimson red while you are trying to carry on in a social situation. I mean, I know my face is red, and everyone that is looking at me knows it is red also - yet no one says anything or gives any indication that there is anything out of the ordinary.Of course,what could they really say? I'm sure that many feel embarrassed for me.

My experience has been that my blushing problem is closely tied into the negative beliefs I have about myself. Until I can change that, I doubt that my blushing problem will get any better.

Drew

_________________
http://www.shyandquiet.com/

herringman1 · Newbie User Joined: Sep 03, 2007 Posts: 31

i can relate to what u are saying..i'm 61 years old and blush just as much now as i did as a teenager..i'm on my 3rd marriage and keep very few friends..I haven't seen my mother and brothers and sisters for 25 years..and i'ts all because of this curse..I'm going home in a couple of weeks for a family reunion..most people would be happy but i'm dreading it..can't sleep just talking about it..can't do meetings,grocery shopping.or any lineups..i'm not so bad outside wearing sunglasses.but the rest of the time is hell..can't seem to overcome it but still hope...)

wonderlife · Newbie User Joined: Aug 06, 2008 Posts: 4 Location: Russia

..well,

It makes me afraid.
So how would i act when my kids will grow up?
They are young kids now. And they like & admire me. We happy play together in the evenings and weekends. They do not understand what is shyness and blushing. And they like me.

But when they grow up and we go to social gatherings. Everybody happy except the 'one' who is just freakingly distinguidhed. Will not my kids then be disappointed by how their father 'look' ...?????

_________________
"Life is full of Wonder !!!"

iamalone · Newbie User Joined: Jul 29, 2008 Posts: 32

I am almost the same with the poster. I can make people laugh very easy, my mimics are perfect, i am smart, i can talk fast, actually think fast while i am talking so that i can convert small conversion to a very funny and long one. I use a lot body language and i talk louder with different tones etc...

I blush talking to my mother with no reason, no strait question, i just blush. I automatically blush if someone asks me if i have a girl friend, or i am handsome... There is no way escape this.

Since 2-3 years i start blushing in the middle of my funny or ordinary talks. Somehow i trigger my brain "you will blush now" then go...

I saw my self on the mirror, maybe 2-3 seconds after the attack: I actually go beyond the blushing. Imagine someone shut with the gun just next to you that you didn't know about it. Or something suddenly happened you scared so so so much. Someone cut your arm and he is going to kill you... How much would you scary? How your face would look like?

That is my face..... Talking to my mum, my relatives, my colleagues

nymphete · Newbie User Joined: Aug 15, 2008 Posts: 4

It feels so comforting to know there are people who are experiencing what I thought was my own private hell. I blush even thinking about blushing. It's so nice to not feel so alone. I always thought I was known as the 'girl who always goes red' at school. Maybe I was, I don't really know, but I am sick of being defined by it. As much as I am told time and time again that there are people worse off than me, eg. burn victims, I can't help but feel as if ugliness just becomes me when I go red. I wish I could be less vain.