Posted: Thu May 19, 2005 1:04 am Post subject: Driving, Low self-esteem and confidence
I'm just looking for some answers and some possible "True support" (Something believable that I can make happen).
Okay I seem to be having trouble driving. I'm 16 years old, I am afraid to take my dad's van out so I can practice more. I'm too worried that if I crash then my dad will get really angry, it would also have a negative impact on my mind because the van is not fully paid yet, and insurance will go up. My parents are poor, their still in debt (well everyone is ).
My driving instructor told me I need to practice more and tells me I need to get some confidence. I seem to daze off while driving missing stop signs and red lights.
Anyone went through the same problems when they were younger?? I have such a low self-confidence that I think I will never graduate from high school!
I can identify with what you are talking about but am not sure I can offer any solution except what little comfort that may be derived from knowing there are other people who are in, or have gone through, the same situation. Learning to drive with my parents was a nightmare. I remember on one particular excursion when I was attempting to pass another vehicle, they both started shouting at me that I was too close. I don't think other people know the effect going into 'alarm mode' has on highly anxious people and that by doing this, they are actually making the situation worse. I still don't like driving with either of them in the car, and I'm in my mid-twenties (sad but true).
Maybe try practicing on a back road to get the feel of driving and when you become comfortable there, start trying more difficult things like making a left turn on a busy road or parallel parking.
I wasn't brave enough to get my license till I was almost 18..and it took me 3 tries!! ...I realize now part of the reason was probably my anxiety...driving with my parents was a nightmare...my Mom would scream at me, making me even more nervous....but lots of practice will help you, it helped me
i think the best thing to do is practice. take the car out just around the neighborhood when theres less cars on the road(like early morning or late evening) and work your way up to busier roads. i've noticed the most difficult thing about driving or for me anyways is just paying attention to the road, if u can pay attention and keep practacing im sure u'll get good at it.
Joined: Apr 18, 2005 Posts: 299 Location: United States of America
Posted: Fri May 20, 2005 2:14 am Post subject:
It's been said, but you gotta get out and practice. Took me about 6 or 7 times out driving to finally get myself to drive on a road rather than in a parking lot...and first time i took the test...didnt even get out of the parking lot , but I'm a good driver now, never been in an accident...dunno what i would do if i ever were...couldnt really avoid talking to that person . Like you maggie, I didn't get my license til i was 18, hell i'd still rather have my mom drive me places.
Joined: Feb 10, 2005 Posts: 1831 Location: United States of America
Posted: Fri May 20, 2005 3:13 am Post subject:
hey there! i didn't drive until i was near 18 and i did that just because i was so embarassed of all these people asking me what car i drove and everything and how was i supposed to tell them i was so afraid to drive? every kid can't wait to do that! but you're not alone. all i can say is you won't crash it, no matter how much you believe you will, you won't. i got my license after 2 weeks of driving in my life and i haven't hit a thing you'll be ok. and also give yourself some time. you're more likily to make a mistake if you're nervous so just psych yourself up first and know that you will one day and it will be such a relief! take care
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...I realize now part of the reason was probably my anxiety...driving with my parents was a nightmare...my Mom would scream at me, making me even more nervous....but lots of practice will help you, it helped me 
, but I'm a good driver now, never been in an accident...dunno what i would do if i ever were...couldnt really avoid talking to that person 
. Like you maggie, I didn't get my license til i was 18, hell i'd still rather have my mom drive me places.
you'll be ok. and also give yourself some time. you're more likily to make a mistake if you're nervous so just psych yourself up first and know that you will one day and it will be such a relief! take care