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Social Phobia World :: View topic - i cant talk to people
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i cant talk to people

 
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lil_chika26
Newbie User
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Joined: Apr 21, 2006
Posts: 4

PostPosted: Fri Apr 21, 2006 3:35 am    Post subject: i cant talk to people Reply with quote

Its so hard for me to talk to people i dont know, especially people my age I'm only 15 and i keep thinking that one day i'll just grow out of it, but i hated it so bad!

The worst part is i turn red all the time even if some guy talks to me that im not interested in. I just dont know what to do i have the lowest self esteem ever!

help me if u kno how : ( Crying or Very sad

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rko74
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Joined: Aug 22, 2005
Posts: 258

PostPosted: Fri Apr 21, 2006 4:29 am    Post subject: me too Reply with quote

Yeah same here (, dont worry your definately not alone thought you may think it at times.Is there anything you find that helps?

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Chihiro
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Joined: Dec 18, 2005
Posts: 253
Location: UK

PostPosted: Fri Apr 21, 2006 4:53 am    Post subject: Re: i cant talk to people Reply with quote

lil_chika26 wrote:
Its so hard for me to talk to people i dont know, especially people my age I'm only 15 and i keep thinking that one day i'll just grow out of it, but i hated it so bad!

The worst part is i turn red all the time even if some guy talks to me that im not interested in. I just dont know what to do i have the lowest self esteem ever!

help me if u kno how : ( Crying or Very sad


Hang on there
I know how u feel, i've felt that at 15, and still do now. Especially the bit about guys talkin to me, i go red and it gives them the wrong idea.

You might want to try to develop some skills by doing a hobbie or activity you like, that could help with the self esteem, When ur good at something it gives you a nice little boost, and something to talk about with others. Maybe u can also spend more effort on how you look to give you more confidence (even though its based on the surface) to face others.

Do you think your problem is more to do with facing people while talkin, or just having nothin to talk about? Perhaps join a sports team or special interest extracurricular club because at least you have a common ground without having to think of things to say from scratch. You can try chatting more online, which i found has improved my conversation skills substantially.

Good luck!

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Moonie
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Joined: Mar 21, 2005
Posts: 278
Location: United States of America

PostPosted: Sun Apr 23, 2006 10:08 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Keep trying. That is the best thing I can offer. I, too, at your age thought I'd grow out of it or metamorph into a new person, etc. I am 23.. Although I am not as shy as I used to be, I am not what I thought I would be. Things do get better, but I suggest you make new efforts along the way.

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forgetit
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Joined: Apr 20, 2006
Posts: 33

PostPosted: Sun Apr 23, 2006 10:37 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

It’s easier to me to talk with people much younger or much older than me, because I feel inferior to the people of my age.

Try to place your attention on their speech, on what they are saying (instead of thinking about you) while you are choosing the right words to say after that.

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Septor
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Joined: Dec 15, 2005
Posts: 1033

PostPosted: Sun Apr 23, 2006 11:29 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Your definately not alone about that.There's a lot of people here that are like that.

I can't give you much advice becuase I still have a lot of problems with it but start out small.Not much help I know. Sad

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imencoded128bit
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Joined: Jun 17, 2006
Posts: 7

PostPosted: Sat Jun 17, 2006 12:32 pm    Post subject: same here Reply with quote

Same here !
i am 18 , male, cant talk either, i cant eve look into their eyes, u r not alone , there are milions with u.....

We people need some kind of help ,but who will come forward to do it ?

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shipost
Intermediate User
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Joined: Apr 24, 2006
Posts: 208
Location: England

PostPosted: Sat Jun 17, 2006 12:49 pm    Post subject: Re: same here Reply with quote

imencoded128bit wrote:
Same here !
i am 18 , male, cant talk either, i cant eve look into their eyes, u r not alone , there are milions with u.....

We people need some kind of help ,but who will come forward to do it ?


lol about eye contact, i cant do that either but when i first started high school there was things called 'staring contest' see who can stare at somone elses eyes without blinking i used to win though but now id die Laughing

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Mysterioux
Newbie User
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Joined: Jun 11, 2006
Posts: 16

PostPosted: Mon Jun 26, 2006 10:50 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hey thar!
I'm 15, too! And until only about early this year i've had the same sort of problem. I still go a little red if i say anything wrong or something like that, but not immeadiately. People have already suggested all the really good ideas, so i'll just blabber on, and you can read if you choose to. Razz

I suggest you join some sort of club or activity, not necessarily with school.
Last year March 17th, (my birthday! Laughing ) I joined something called the ATC, which is the Air Training Corps, commonly known as Air Cadets. It's good there, you immeadiately meet a whole load of new people, but because new people are arriving all the time, it's nothing like being the new kid at school. And everyone's always so friendly, and rules about bullying are far stricter and more enforced than at school. Smile It's improved my confidence so so so much, and i'm friends with the type of people i'd never be friends with just being at school.
If you're interested in something like this, there's the Air Cadets, Sea/ Navy Cadets, and Army Cadets. I'd definately recommend Air Cadets. Very Happy

I love the discipline of it all, and it's still great fun. If you're not too keen on that sort of thing, maybe you could join guides or some sort of youth club?

Anyhue. I'm so much better now, and i can have a short conversation with people i don't know, plus, it gives you a slightly more authoritive feel over the people that would perhaps bully you. And i know that there's some sort of aura that i give off now, that makes people like that avoid me.

Anyways. Best of luck! x

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Lyricaljust
Newbie User
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Joined: Aug 15, 2006
Posts: 16
Location: Kansas City

PostPosted: Thu Aug 17, 2006 10:10 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Yeah I understand where your coming from.. when I was younger.. like in Middle School I couldn't even look anyone in the eye and whenever I was walking my head was always down.. and I just was dead silent. I'm still a quiet person.. I dont' know I'm not the type to just talk to anyone just like that.. I guess it all just lies in the opportunity if there's a pretty good opportunity to talk to someone that I dont' know then most of the time I take it.. but yeah.. I keep to myself most of the time.

Justin

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