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Pinker
Elite User
Joined: May 03, 2005
Posts: 1165
Location: England
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 Posted: Fri Dec 14, 2007 8:59 pm Post subject: arrogance? |
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Does anyone think because you're anxious or quiet some people see you as arrogant or they back away? It might be all in my head but this is what I feel a lot of times.. i've got a bad habit of trying to psychoanalyse people as well, hell I think I just over analyse things full stop. I wish I could live on my own in some idyllic landscape.. im fed up of the world humans have created, it fucking sucks.
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Butterflies
Intermediate User
Joined: Oct 10, 2007
Posts: 137
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| Posted: Fri Dec 14, 2007 10:06 pm Post subject: |
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Yes - I agree. As a teenager (I'm no longer a teenager) people thought I was stuck up - I was very choosy about who I let my guard down with - I had a few friends, but not the easiest to get close to.
I also used to look at people and decide very quickly if I liked them or not. Call it arrogance if you like - but most times I was right about their character.
On a positive side - I believe being that way ensured the friends I did have were true friends that liked me for who I was. The people that took the time to get to know the "real' me. I would rather that than fake friendships.
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EveM
Newbie User
Joined: Dec 05, 2007
Posts: 63
Location: England
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| Posted: Fri Dec 14, 2007 10:38 pm Post subject: |
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I suppose... sometimes I feel like people see ME as intimidating! If only they knew what I was thinking and feeling inside!
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Joey86
Intermediate User
Joined: Sep 08, 2007
Posts: 108
Location: Melbourne, Australia
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| Posted: Fri Dec 14, 2007 10:57 pm Post subject: |
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| Butterflies wrote: | | On a positive side - I believe being that way ensured the friends I did have were true friends that liked me for who I was. The people that took the time to get to know the "real' me. I would rather that than fake friendships. |
Yup that's so true. I'm happy with the small circle of friends that I have.
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dottie
Expert User
Joined: Sep 06, 2007
Posts: 522
Location: USA
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| Posted: Fri Dec 14, 2007 11:11 pm Post subject: |
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| EveM wrote: | | I suppose... sometimes I feel like people see ME as intimidating! If only they knew what I was thinking and feeling inside! |
exactly
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Vulvectomy
Intermediate User
Joined: Dec 12, 2007
Posts: 102
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| Posted: Sat Dec 15, 2007 12:50 am Post subject: |
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Yeah. My cousin (who's way more shy than even I am) can be really, really stuck up sometimes. He's a cool guy, but I think shyness is self-centeredness in a weird way. Because it's your focus on yourself that makes you feel so inferior.
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M1tCh
Newbie User
Joined: Jul 23, 2007
Posts: 71
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| Posted: Sat Dec 15, 2007 12:59 am Post subject: |
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| EveM wrote: | | I suppose... sometimes I feel like people see ME as intimidating! If only they knew what I was thinking and feeling inside! |
Yeah, spot on.
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Thesephotographs
Newbie User
Joined: Dec 10, 2007
Posts: 25
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| Posted: Tue Jan 15, 2008 11:33 pm Post subject: |
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Yes! I worry people will think this about me, esp. when In the right situation I'm not that shy. I think they'll see two different characters and be confused.
But I'm really not arrogant at all.
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BFox
Newbie User
Joined: Mar 20, 2008
Posts: 5
Location: Canada
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| Posted: Thu Mar 20, 2008 3:15 am Post subject: |
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| EveM wrote: | | I suppose... sometimes I feel like people see ME as intimidating! If only they knew what I was thinking and feeling inside! |
I can relate to this: I've had people tell me that their first impression of me was that I was a stuck up bitch, uptight, cranky and have even had people tell me they thought I looked like a scrapper who could 'take care of herself' (trust me, I hate fighting!).
It makes me so sad, cause I know what I look like is driving people away. I can barely mutter a 'hello' as I walk past, and wish I could stop and chit chat!
Yep, appearances aren't everything and I wish I could just relax, smile and enjoy being social! Ugh, it's so frustrating!
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tinseltoes78
Newbie User
Joined: Mar 25, 2008
Posts: 4
Location: Uk
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| Posted: Fri Mar 28, 2008 10:08 am Post subject: |
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I feel exactly the same, I would love to be able to walk along the street, relaxed and happy, not caring if someone is going to walk out of their gate, and 'want' to speak to me (as if) - why am I so scared of something thats not going to happen!? 
I am even aware that when I do speak to people that they think I am being miserable, I feel like i'm being judged on what I do and don't say? 
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