one comment which has affected your confidence

PhantomPod · Posted: Thu Sep 11, 2008 5:11 am Post subject:

I was always a tomboy, and there were times when I was little where kids would ask me straight to my face if I was a boy or a girl. I will never forget that. I am 100% self-conscious of myself and my looks now, because I do not want people to mistake me for a boy.

Also, last year on the bus home from school, I said "thank you" to the bus driver as I was getting off the bus and he said, "you're welcome sir." Then, when he saw my ponytail as I started walking down the bus steps, I heard him say "oh, sorry!" But I just pretended I didn't hear a thing and then I never said "thank you" to him for the rest of the school year.

I cut my hair short a few months ago (which was a big move, as it had been long my whole life), and I still have thoughts almost everyday like, "oh crap, why did I cut my hair short? Now people are going to think I'm a boy." Like, although I am happy with my short haircut, I still worry that people will think I am a boy just because of the whole societal thought that "long hair = girl, short hair = boy."

Oh yeah, and right after I got my haircut our neighbors were over and they have a little 4-year old girl who I love to death, and her mom said, "what do you think of her hair?" And the girl sort of made a weird face and said, "she looks like a boy." Yeah, I'll never forget that one either. The day a 4-year old practically made me cry.

Hylke · Newbie User Joined: Sep 10, 2008 Posts: 45

Hey you intensly ugly person.

It was especially hurting because it just came from a random guy I had never spoken to before.

Walk · Posted: Thu Sep 11, 2008 9:40 am Post subject:

I was 12, in jr. high, and just came back from summer. I didn't hang out with any of my friends in summer vacation, mainly because they lived a little too far.

I saw them during lunch, and I decided to join them.

I literally got pushed away by one, with no opposition from the others.

Possibly the start of my SA.

Walk · Posted: Thu Sep 11, 2008 9:54 am Post subject:

In high school, I was asked a few times to hang out, but probably due to that time in jr high, I declined.

But as a gem in the soil that was high school, this uber hot girl told me, sincerely, that I was "extremely cute". Felt great, but that's as far as it went. Only until recently have I been shedding off the shame and guilt from my fucked up adolescence.

xtina_fan81 · Newbie User Joined: Jun 30, 2006 Posts: 38

"if you were my daughter, id kill you"

and that came from a person who was the closest thing i had to a "friend" at the time, even though she obviously was nowhere near a real one.

_________________
I'm not crazy, I'm just a little unwell
I know right now you can't tell
But stay awhile and maybe then you'll see
A different side of me

krs1snow · Newbie User Joined: Aug 30, 2008 Posts: 12

When I was little I used to lay in my parents bed & read my stories to them, usually to my mom. It would take me forever cuz I was new to reading but i wouldn't let them help me w/the words. One nite my mom said "You're such a patient girl! You just keep trying until you get it"
This made me feel great! Very Happy

It affected my confidence & today, I love to read!

A-UK-Lovely · Newbie User Joined: Sep 07, 2008 Posts: 30

i got the award once in college for best room enterance lol i dunno ive had alot of nice compliments....
the one that shocked me the most tho was when me and a friend were havin a semi arguement, and shes goes to me ' its ok for you! everyone respects you!' i was really taken back by this like woah, i never realised?

so that was nice.

xtina_fan81 · Newbie User Joined: Jun 30, 2006 Posts: 38

spose i shd post a positive one as well lol umm, that i have a nice butt? ive got that compliment more than once. lol.

_________________
I'm not crazy, I'm just a little unwell
I know right now you can't tell
But stay awhile and maybe then you'll see
A different side of me

decadeOfSA · Posted: Thu Sep 11, 2008 8:01 pm Post subject:

I haven't really had anyone, besides my father, say anything bad about me (to my face anyway, maybe they did behind my back) since Junior High. I was fat, had glasses and had braces then. I was bullied quite a bit then and a few little punks tried to start fights with me and I quickly ended them and nobody has wanted to tangle with me since. I got contacts, got the braces off and lost weight and turned into an attractive guy gradually after eight grade, so I had a lot of girls after me in High School(and still do) and nobody really said anything bad to me. I was more or less a loner though, because of my SA. My dad has always been a big time critic of mine and says I'm using SA as a crutch and he doesn't think it is very serious. Several other family members probably think the same way, but they have never really said anything directly to my face. I think "they" have finally realized that I have a problem and I am dealing with it the best way I can. I'm not lazy and I'm going back to school and stuff, but still my dad is always on my case. My mom understands my problem though. I'm sure there are other people that I used to be friends with or know me that wonder what the fuck my problem is and think I'm messed up though, but generally nobody, besides my dad, have really said anything really insulting to me for quite awhile. For some reason, there was a short time when I little to no anxiety starting at the start of my Senior year in high school and it lasted for a couple of years and then my anxiety came back worse than before and I've had it bad ever since. I have always been the loner type and never wanted to do what other kids wanted to do when I was younger, so I never developed any great social skills. Then the bullying in Junior High must have lingered. The funny thing is I think is I always consciously think positive thoughts about myself(at least most of the time), but when I'm around people, I have anxiety symptoms. I don't act especially shy either. I talk a lot and am not withdrawn, but I just fell uncomfortable around people for some reason. I have no "conscious' negative thoughts, like "I am ugly" or "Everyone hates me" , etc. I just get anxiety symptoms around people for some reason.

BV85 · Newbie User Joined: Sep 13, 2008 Posts: 3

Was at a nightclub and this person just looked at me and was like EWWWW.......funny thing was he was ugly as fuck as well lol.