one comment which has affected your confidence

recluse · Posted: Fri Apr 18, 2008 5:57 am Post subject:

My dad and other people used to comment on how fat i had become when i was around 10 years old. i became anorexic at the age of 15 and my weight dropped down to 7 stone, i didn't have the heart to tell my counsellor that it was from these people and not school bullies which hurt me so much. To this day i am still conscious about how i look, and the most hurtfull comment is when someone comments on how big my belly is getting.

Also when i was in college i got really depressed and i could not be bothered with my work there, i had started drinking quite often just to numb my pain and my mother called me a looser and a dropout, she also told me when i was depressed ''No wonder you haven't got a grilfriend!''

Yeah, comments from ''loved'' ones are much more damaging.

miss_amy · Intermediate User Joined: Nov 21, 2007 Posts: 274

I can't think of a one off comment. I think its a string of constant put downs that have been my problem. Some that stick in my mind are

-my dad calling me a slut and tart and other similar names. I don't understand why, I wasn't, I know now but believed it then but didn't know why or how to fix myself. He once accused me of sleeping with his work friend, he was so nasty and spiteful. I was about 16. I did not do it and to this day it bothers me that he either thinks I did or could say such a thing if he knows its not true. I sometimes wonder whether confronting him over this an asking would help or just make things worse for me.

-'well we expected you to fail' when I failed my first driving test. Again my dad.

-and again......told me I was too thick for further education. i said the school says I'm good enough and he said they would say that coz they get their budget per student.

-ex calling me sack arse and scar belly and that Im absolutely disgusting. He found out that someone at work had asked me out. He stormed in and basically tried to floor the guy and started yelling in front of everyone about how gross I am with no clothes on. Sooooo embarrassed and then I got a warning from work because of his behaviour.

- my gran telling me my baby died because we were not married when he was conceived. How hurtful can people be.

Chiaroscuro · Posted: Fri Apr 18, 2008 11:49 am Post subject:

Do you know what. There are a bunch of things I could write here. But I just don't get how this bringing them up again will help at all.

Argamemnon · Expert User Joined: Jan 15, 2008 Posts: 716

shon · Posted: Fri Apr 18, 2008 1:50 pm Post subject:

After my daughter was born, I put on a lot of weight. My dad told my aunt that after I got married I "got fat and let myself go". That hurts coming from my dad even though I should've been used to his judgmental crap.

There's been a lot of shitty things said to me but I don't want to relive it. Confused

jaidacoy · Newbie User Joined: Mar 02, 2008 Posts: 13

bf says.. "can't you just relax!"

or friend says.. "i noticed you keep on buzzing" he notices the anxiety lol

im fcked

jaidacoy · Newbie User Joined: Mar 02, 2008 Posts: 13

To Raveno: disfigurement.. is something hard.. but it can make u a better person.. if you accept yourself.. and allow yourself to believe.. 'i deserve tp be happy'. you overcome every bit of that.

your struggle will be harder.. but you gotta be X10 stronger and not give up!

toothpastekisses · Posted: Mon Apr 21, 2008 5:21 pm Post subject:

"LOOK at her, she's like a puppet...never say's anything, just grins like an idiot" OUCH, thanks dad...

de · Posted: Mon Apr 21, 2008 5:24 pm Post subject:

my mum told said to me "you were a fucking accident" lol id say that the majority of kids are but you defintly shouldnt tell them and what has made it worse was that she denied ever saying it to me

princess_haru · Posted: Mon Apr 21, 2008 8:08 pm Post subject:

Ouch... the things people here have had said to them are awful Sad

Meh, guess it's my turn...

Oh that's ***, she's soo sad - a girl at school "introducing" me to her friends.

I hate you! - my mum, when I was about 15 because I was causing her trouble by not going to school (I couldn't face going, it wasn't laziness).

You've got a really pointy chin, haven't you? - random guy in a pub, didn't even know him, just happened to be stood near the idiot!

Nah, she's just slighty above average - another stranger in a pub, no wonder I try to stay away from the places, lol! I was having a drink with my boyfriend's stepdad and he made a comment in a kind of proud-stepfatherly way that he thought I was stunning. I didn't really take it to heart, but it made me feel good for all of 5 seconds, before an old bloke butted in with the above while staring at me as if I was an inanimate object and not a person Evil or Very Mad

(Of course, the women at the table looked very pleased and smug when he said it... gahh I hate bitchy female competitiveness!)

What's wrong with you - do you have AIDS or something? - girls in my class at school. I'd had a lot of time off because I was terrified of going to school, plus I looked kind of pale and thin from an eating disorder.

Your dad's dead! - a teenage boy followed me and my brother down the road after school chanting this when he found out our father had died. I pretty much gave up on speaking to people after that.