somthing happend tonight. i got in a fight with my parents and i took off in my car im just driving around trying to blow off steam i was at a red light and then i hit me like it has never done it befor my thoughts hit me so strong much much stronger than it has ever befor i whent insain was beating my wheel had to pull over was covering myface with my hands and squeezing m face as hard as i could trying to snap my self out of it. was scratching my arms till they terned red was shaking and i wanted to kill so badly so damn badly like i have never befor all i wanted to do was tast blood in my mouth and kill someone. and its neer lasted that long befor. thankfuly i was alone in my car and FAR away from anyone but this time was diffrant than all the other times this time im pritty sure if someone was in the car with my i would have hurt them badly or if anyone was around me. im scared as hell right now im realy scared i might snap now out of no where. what if i hurt someone that i love=( what will happend to me? im to scared to be around anyone right now i finaly snaped out of it when one of my friends called me she was having a realy bad night and could tell somthing was wrong with me b/c i was breathing hard and the way my voice sounded i didnt tell her what was wrong i just made up somthing we talked for a while till i was calmed down all the way and till she was felling better to
Joined: Dec 07, 2006 Posts: 420 Location: 44/m/miami
Posted: Sat Sep 27, 2008 8:02 am Post subject:
thoughts wrote:
i wanted to kill so badly so damn badly like i have never befor all i wanted to do was tast blood in my mouth and kill someone. and its neer lasted that long befor. thankfuly i was alone in my car and FAR away from anyone
A car is a perfect killing machine, if you really wanted to kill someone then just a flick of the wrist on the steering wheel and it would be done. Stop listening to the crap going on in your head. Connect with your values and start moving in that direction. Life is too short to spend it inside your brain, playing with your thoughts. Who cares what your thoughts are, what are your values?
Apparently your values aren't killing people, but helping people. Your friend called and needed your help, you didn't kill her, you helped her. When you follow your values and not your thoughts and feelings, you will lead a richer, fuller life.
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