I got you all beat i think, im 20 and have never had a real friend until last year let alone a boy/girl friend. And i'm not talking about people you're aqquainted with either through work, school, whatever. People you actually hang out with and do stuff with, talk to on the phone visit each others, sleep overs whatever. I met my friend 2years ago got her number last year and she visited me 4 the first time twice so far this year.
Posted: Fri Mar 07, 2008 3:55 am Post subject: wow this cracked me up alot cause i saw myself
im new to this whole forum thing. and im 26 andhavent been on a date in like 4 years. a lot of it is becuase i lock myself in the house. most guys would say im attractive, i guess, but i dont think im as cute as i used to be ahahah i used to date a lot in my earlier twenties, and then as i got older i got dissappointed with myself, and felt others would judge me the same way. (dont be surprised if your a great catch) and i never had a serious relationship, but who cares. i know im capable of having one.
but now this past year i realized, i do not regret locking myself in the house in some ways. becuase im a different person. and i got to know myself. 4 years ago i was a complete ass, and would have chose the wrong person. so sometimes its for the best. i spared myself from a lot of useless drama. dude if your 31 hey that is the great age to start. ahah. i think the older ones are a lot more attractive only becuase they know themselves very well, even if you have SA. no offense to the young dudes on here lol.
anyhoo, i noticed people with SA are really big thinkers and a lot of them are smart, but beat themselves up too much. i dont believe you have to like throw yourself out there to find the right person. but i also know you cant just sit in your house either. theirs the delima. i have the same problem too. i probably only leave the house like three times a week, and that is being around a large group.
i also recently learned that not all people want someone who is really that socially out going. i mean i struggle with SA and becuase i was comfortable around one guy, another guy that i did like tossed my ass cause he thought i was too out going. what heck is that about? lol i cant win! just really think about what you want in a person. i spent the past 4 years putting a lot of thought becuase i was soooo dumb. but im confident that he is out there somewhere lolol. anyhoo, SA doesnt make you unattractive. crap, i think guys that are very out going are too hard to keep up with sometimes.
I don't think it's the shyness that people, particularly women, find unattractive. I've seen lots of shy guys get plenty of girls. I think that SPs are also quite passive, which women almost always find unattractive.
I don't think it's the shyness that people, particularly women, find unattractive. I've seen lots of shy guys get plenty of girls. I think that SPs are also quite passive, which women almost always find unattractive.
Strange; I'm attracted to shy girls, certainly not the outgoing ones.
I don't think it's the shyness that people, particularly women, find unattractive. I've seen lots of shy guys get plenty of girls. I think that SPs are also quite passive, which women almost always find unattractive.
Strange; I'm attracted to shy girls, certainly not the outgoing ones.
But that's totally different. It's been proven that men react much stronger to the way a woman looks, and that women react towards a guy's personality. That's why it's almost always the same girls guys think are hot, but if you have the right personality traits, any average looking guy can get plenty of girls. I wish I could get attracted to a girl just by her personality, but nope, I only wanna go out with the ones who I'm physically attracted to. That's just nature.
Posted: Wed Mar 12, 2008 2:37 am Post subject: rko
Cold fury is right - I also loved the book WITHOUT EMBARRASSMENT - very helpful stuff. Lots of helpful ideas on toxic shame (which you sound like you've got a case of) and moving forward without apology. I just like the title - used to have it on my cellular phone screen background to remind me not to feel embarrassed about anything I tried.
I doubt many of you are as ugly as this man so have faith in yourself!
But what the latest thing discussed here is that women actaully doesn't care that much about looks.
_________________ Stop making kids.
Compulsory sterilization is good.
More security. Less freedom.
The word "cowardly" is often used as another word for effectivly.
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