Pretty much hit rock bottom

I won't go into detail here, but I've pretty much hit the bottom of the barrel.

I feel in the past weeks I've completely lost control of my life. There are people around me (organisations, family) who want to help me and say you have to do this and that, but I feel paralyzed because it's overwhelming and I don't know where to begin. I hate it being vulnerable, dependent, and I feel ashamed and fearful and because of that I've been in denial of my situation for very long. I didn't take responsibility for my life and it has gone un-checked for very long. My financial situation has escalated to severe proportions. But I need help, both financial and psychological, there's no getting around it, if I am to rebuild my life.

There's many things that need to be done, but I feel at least I've woken up from my deep slumber. I've finally reached out to people and they are willing to help me. Maybe this needed to happen.

Would it sound weird if I said sometimes the only way up is down? I'm sure you you'll get everything sorted out eventually, and even though the experience was not pleasant, you'll be a better person for it

Make a list of the things you need to do to get better, and start from the beginning, with small steps. If you try to do everything at once, or feel like there are too many things, that's a clear sign that you need to write things down, pack your mental bags, and go.

Would it sound weird if I said sometimes the only way up is down? I'm sure you you'll get everything sorted out eventually, and even though the experience was not pleasant, you'll be a better person for it

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No it doesn't sound weird. I do feel ashamed it has come to this, but you're right, the only way to go from down is up. I've limped on in life for a long time, so the changes that will be taken will hopefully make a lasting difference, not that it will be easy, but at least I am in a position to tackle my problems. It will probably be a long term thing to get out of my situation.

Make a list of the things you need to do to get better, and start from the beginning, with small steps. If you try to do everything at once, or feel like there are too many things, that's a clear sign that you need to write things down, pack your mental bags, and go.

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That's the best way really. Thanks. Sorting out paperwork has never been my strongest suit and I'd rather escape from it altogether (as I have). But doing it in small steps and breaking it down, writing it down will make it feel less like an overwhelming task. And when it is done and things are at least orderly, it will hopefully also make me sleep a little better.

There you go. By doing things in an organized fashion, and making sure you make progress every single day (and not fretting too much about setbacks, as long as you keep going) will make you sleep better and feel like you're going somewhere palpable.

anomicdeer , sorry you feel you're in the same boat.

A few days ago I have opened up to people around me about my financial problems, unemployment and depression. I just thought I no longer had the energy to put up a mask and to lie. It's time for me to face the music.

Some people have kicked me in the *** and called me out on idiotic things I should've done ages ago. Filling in certain forms for wellfare, this and that. Things I've laid off because I was stuck in a severe depression and didnt even have food. But it was necessary to take action and people have helped me get on the right path, get in touch with the right organisations etc.

I've also received a lot of support and kind words.

There is help out there, but it takes opening up and getting past shame.

gustavofring said:

There is help out there, but it takes opening up and getting past shame.

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Obviously, right? I think that's why we are all here.

I think it's good to talk to people who are going through the same things as you like you are. If you talk to someone more in control all the time it's hard to just simply learn from them because everyone has a different path of life.