I really want a girlfriend but I'm really shy. I feel really bad that I graduated college without getting one. All I do is go to work and come home. This doesn't bother me so much. I just want a girlfriend to come home to and eat dinner with and wind down for the day. I'd like that a lot. It's really bumming me out that I don't have a gf. I don't even know how to get one at this point since I'm not in school anymore.
really sad that I don't have a girlfriend
- Thread starter don21
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dannyboy65
Well-known member
I would say try a dating site. Also don't rush it because you need time to know the person. You should also maybe find a support group for your shyness and gain some confidence cause women love confidence 
Just be yourself
Just be yourselfI would say try a dating site. Also don't rush it because you need time to know the person. You should also maybe find a support group for your shyness and gain some confidence cause women love confidence
Too ugly for online dating and too scared to meet up with a stranger from the internet. I've tried support groups. Made me feel worse as most people there only had mild social anxiety while mine is quite severe.
dannyboy65
Well-known member
Too ugly for online dating and too scared to meet up with a stranger from the internet. I've tried support groups. Made me feel worse as most people there only had mild social anxiety while mine is quite severe.
I doubt you are to ugly because everyone finds they are ugly. Maybe to girls you are attractive and don't know it. Hell I find I'm gross, but I had girls tell me I was super attractive and most of the time they don't but there are girls who will find you attractive. I think though if you want a girlfriend you should push yourself to go back to support groups and try to learn ways to cope. You need to love yourself before you can love someone else. I'm not trying to discourage you I just feel you should get your social anxiety in check, I'm not saying cured, I'm saying try to get just a little bit of confidence for a starter.
THeCARS1979
Well-known member
I'm in that club too, although I go out sometimes, and grocery and m ad ll shopping but still can't find a girlfriend
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theslowesthand
Banned
I'm in my 40s, and i gave up hoping for a gf probably in my late teens. I just knew i was too screwed-up, too neurotic, too negative, too ugly, too wierd, too ........
But that didn't stop my yearning, oh no. There's always been this (most likely mostly fantasy) attraction to women. And there's been a number of real opportunities, in hindsight (so very close yet still so far), but life obviously didn't want me to go down that route - it wanted me to stay 100% strictly single, not even any casual encounters - it wanted me to get as frustrated as a man can possibly get, so as to learn some kind of life lesson/s from it (eg to rid myself of desires, like with buddhism)
But that didn't stop my yearning, oh no. There's always been this (most likely mostly fantasy) attraction to women. And there's been a number of real opportunities, in hindsight (so very close yet still so far), but life obviously didn't want me to go down that route - it wanted me to stay 100% strictly single, not even any casual encounters - it wanted me to get as frustrated as a man can possibly get, so as to learn some kind of life lesson/s from it (eg to rid myself of desires, like with buddhism)
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Sacrament
Well-known member
Life didn't want anything, it was up to you to make the best of those situations.
theslowesthand
Banned
And i always didn't make the best of those situations. Why?. I don't really know. So i just blame my personality for it all (or "life" as i said).
Megaten
Well-known member
Good news is that you can still date later in life. For one reason or another, there's quite a few single older people that are very lonely and don't wanna go hit up clubs like a kid in college. A guy without kids and a ton of exes would be rare as diamonds and id bet someone would appreciate that. That's how my professor is. She's in her 40s, divorced and the kids just left for college so she's pretty alone and I can see it on her face when my classmates get to talking about their love lives.
theslowesthand
Banned
True, but i'm personally incapable of taking any action (pubs/clubs, dating apps, asking random women out). There's my refusal to experience any rejection, nor to do anything outside my comfort zone. The only way were if i were to see a woman regularly at a shop (as i only go abroad to do my shopping), and she approached me (which women don't tend to do). So, i can't honestly see anything happening for quite a few more years yet, if ever. But that's okay, as i'm considerably attached to the status quo of being single & alone.
Megaten
Well-known member
Don't worry, you're not missing much. Unless you enjoy arguments for no reason, and someone trying to change you all of a sudden, when who you were wasn't a problem before. However if love the feeling that you're a Ken doll that could easily be replaced for the newest model, totally get a girlfriend.
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THeCARS1979
Well-known member
That just doesn't sound as fun , lol sorry no thanks
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Bronson99
Well-known member
Then why are you even bothering with it, bro?
Megaten
Well-known member
This is a rather recent development. Sorry for the sudden change of heart.