scoliosis, insomnia, all my conditions make me look bad...
I DO walk funny, I DO have poor posture, even if I tried. I DO carry myself around like a "depressed" person, because I have insomnia, and certain conditions which make me APPEAR to carry myself in a "wrong" way which people may consider "wrong" and thus avoid me especially if they are the type to make fun of or avoid "negative" persons. I have pain which I carry around with me. etc. I guess it's hard to tell whether I just genuinely feel emotionally bad, or painfully bad, when I don't have any "In your face" conditions, ie I don't appear that "unhealthy" for people to think "oh he's just got some problems". Almost invisible unless you pay attention. At first glance people can think I just don't know how to carry myself, or am very negative or gloomy. I may also appear lazy since I since I've had insomnia.
When I mention any of my conditions, they all have a chance to be misinterpretted as something which I have caused, pretty much deliberately or because of "personality disorders". I am thought to be a weak, inferior, poor in spirit, faithless, etc.
Mostly because in these days when someone is showing FEELINGS whther they be emotional or physical, if they can't readily see really physically showy people may be made fun of, for being a "poor victim" which translates to having no wit, no faith, lack of common sense, stupid, etc. weak, inferior, etc.
I guess the only thing left to do is just accept that there is bound to be some misunderstandings and try to keep a light and positive tone. Maybe someone out there may be able or willing to understand and may see some good in me.
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