should I or shouldn't I voice my feelings to the dude who hurt me?

CrazyGirl

Well-known member
k, this dude who called out on my feelings saying I was seeking attention because I was depressed because I didn't have any close friends. This same dude, he is now battling cancer. I found out through FB when his fiance sets up one of those fundraising page through a trusted organization to help pay medical bills.

My heart is wanting to tell off but my mind says no. I actually sent him a msg that I was praying for him n did donate a very small chunk to his medical bills. No thank you from him yet.
 

Pacific_Loner

Pirate from the North Pole
I saw your other thread and the cancer could very well explain why he did not sympathize about your depression and said he wanted to surround himself with positive people - Now I'm not sure what you expect from him? Which feelings do you need to voice?
 

CrazyGirl

Well-known member
I saw your other thread and the cancer could very well explain why he did not sympathize about your depression and said he wanted to surround himself with positive people - Now I'm not sure what you expect from him? Which feelings do you need to voice?

he didn't have cancer when I was having depression issues. I just wanna be like well the tables are turned along that line
 

Diend

Well-known member
that kind of vengeful remark isn't going to end well. keep it to yourself, please.
 

Hellhound

Super Moderator
No. You should not. Don't be selfish and have some consideration for the poor guy. Try to make friends with him or something, send him some support.
 
k, this dude who called out on my feelings saying I was seeking attention because I was depressed because I didn't have any close friends. This same dude, he is now battling cancer. I found out through FB when his fiance sets up one of those fundraising page through a trusted organization to help pay medical bills.

My heart is wanting to tell off but my mind says no. I actually sent him a msg that I was praying for him n did donate a very small chunk to his medical bills. No thank you from him yet.

You know what you want to do. Nobody else can make that call for you. Ask yourself this though, how would he treat you if you were the one now with cancer?
 

PhillipJFry

Well-known member
I don't think you should be like "well the tables are turned now."
I'm no doctor, but according to the the world health organization more than 60% of the total number of people diagnosed with some type of cancer die from it.

I mean, it's literally, as in not figuratively, easier to die from cancer than it is to predict a coin flip(50%). This guy is probs dealing with the reality that one day soon, there might be one less him in the universe; and that's a lot to drop on a person who's spent their whole lives being an unique human individual.

Like, as far as I know, this guy gets one go at existing, just like you, just like me, just like everyone, I'm pretty sure it wasn't in his master plan to have cancer.
He shouldn't have called your depression attention seeking, he's a real butt-munch for doing that.

But if telling him off will really make your life better, then go for it. I mean, if you can say "I'm glad I got revenge on that guy with cancer that hurt my feelings, by also hurting his feelings" when it's your turn to die next on this earth, then you should totally "tell him off" like you say your heart muscle wants you to do.
 

PhillipJFry

Well-known member
Aw man I just re-read what I wrote and realized how mean it sounds. Please pretend what I said instead was "Please don't do anything regrettable"
 

PugofCrydee

You want to know how I got these scars?
Hey man, we all make mistakes. If you can't reach out to the guy who is now suffering from a life threatening disease, then its best to just leave him be.

Personally, If we crossed paths, I'd say privately to him 'hey, I heard you're not well? I just wanted you to know that even though we've not been what you'd call 'best friends', I hope you get well soon'.
 
I think that kind of petty vengefulness when dealing with somebody struggling to stay alive is bizarre. I understand when someone puts you down for your condition and then that person makes a mistake you will want to return the favor but this scenario should be dealt with in silence
 

LazyHermitCrab

Well-known member
I wouldnt talk to him anymore. You already were nice before just leave it at that. He has a fiance now who doesn't need to know. You would just add extra stress telling him off. I know you were hurt and what he said was rude but don't waste your time with someone like that... what are you hoping to gain? You wouldn't gain anything for talking like that just putting yourself on the same rude level... you can do better that by being strong and moving on with someone who respects you
 
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