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Old 09-08-2011  
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Default Re: The unanswered questions of the universe

Why do they put pictures of fruits on cereal boxes

Yes i have been fooled once , i was young and innocent
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Old 09-08-2011  
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Default Re: The unanswered questions of the universe

Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard when he lives in the jungle without a razor?

Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are flat?

Why do banks charge a fee on 'insufficient funds' when they know there is not enough?

Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?

Whose idea was it to put an 'S' in the word 'lisp'?

What is the speed of darkness?

Why is it that people say they 'slept like a baby' when babies wake up every two hours?

If the temperature is zero outside today and it's going to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold will it be?

Do married people live longer than single ones or does it only seem longer?

How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?

Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?

Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, 'I think I'll squeeze
these pink dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?'

Who was the first person to say, 'See that chicken there... I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes outta it's bum.'

Why do toasters always have a setting so high that could burn the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?

Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?

Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their bum when they ask where the bathroom is?

Last edited by Dead_on_Arrival; 09-08-2011 at 09:06 AM..
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Old 09-08-2011  
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Default Re: The unanswered questions of the universe

Quote:
Originally Posted by Waybuloo View Post
What is a good replacement for the Capitalist state of affairs that dominate the world?
Remus-ism

Outsourcing jobs to exploit cheap slave labour is unpatriotic and destroys the working and middle class. We'll end up with 98% unemployed, 1% with all the money and 1% serving them thier fat cat dinners. The instigators should be first against the wall when the revolution comes.


"Burn down the disco
Hang the blessed DJ
Because the music that they constantly play
IT SAYS NOTHING TO ME ABOUT MY LIFE"

Last edited by Remus; 09-08-2011 at 09:24 AM..
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Old 09-08-2011  
Elite User
 

Default Re: The unanswered questions of the universe

Why does your Gynaecologist leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway?

Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs !

If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?

If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?

If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?

Stop singing and read on......

Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?

Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?

Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?
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Old 09-09-2011  
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Default Re: The unanswered questions of the universe

Why me...?
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Old 09-09-2011  
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Default Re: The unanswered questions of the universe

Quote:
Originally Posted by Remus View Post
Outsourcing jobs to exploit cheap slave labour is unpatriotic and destroys the working and middle class. We'll end up with 98% unemployed, 1% with all the money and 1% serving them thier fat cat dinners.
you say that like it hasn't already happened yet

"To succeed in the world it is not enough to be stupid, you must also be well-mannered." - Voltaire

"We cannot become what we want to be by remaining what we are." - Max De Pree

"Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage." - Anais Nin
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Old 09-09-2011  
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Default Re: The unanswered questions of the universe

Quote:
Originally Posted by takethislife View Post
Why me...?
Whatever it is, I'm sure you're not alone
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Old 09-10-2011  
A86
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Default Re: The unanswered questions of the universe

are my thoughts influencing my emotions or are my emotions influencing my thoughts?
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Old 09-12-2011  
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Default Re: The unanswered questions of the universe

Quote:
Originally Posted by A86 View Post
are my thoughts influencing my emotions or are my emotions influencing my thoughts?
Both
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Old 09-12-2011  
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Default Re: The unanswered questions of the universe

Why can't I sleep tonight?
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