bluesky
Member
Much of my youth was spent living with depression, feeling isolated and struggling with anxiety. I'm in my late 20s now and while I feel I have made a lot of progress over time I think I've developed a destructive way of thinking that is very hard to shake away. Particularly when it comes to relationships.
Romantically I've never been involved with anyone. Perhaps it was a confidence thing or perhaps it was out of fear. Maybe even a little of both. At times I feel discouraged since the entire dating scenario seems awkward. Especially now that I am a bit older but still haven't had any experience romantically. People tell me not to worry, that I will meet someone when I least expect it, but I often doubt these people would take into consideration meeting a person is much more difficult for someone struggling with severe anxiety. Opportunities may arise but how to take advantage of them when you already have so many doubts about yourself?
I've tried counselling on and off for years and have been doing it on a steady basis for the past four years or so. And while I have improved and feel more comfortable around other people I still don't think it's helped in regards to being able to establish a romantic relationship with someone. I still feel doubtful and insecure. Another issue would be the discomfort I have on the idea of being used by men.
It's not like I haven't tried. For awhile I experimented with online dating sites to no avail. Either my inbox would get bombarded by cheesy one-liners by people looking for one thing or the people I've contacted would not respond. I've tried clubbing and quickly established it just isn't the place for me or the place to meet a guy who's interesting in a relationship as opposed to a one-night stand. At the moment I don't have any friends I can go out with and I feel it limits me in terms of meeting other people. I've tried groups on meetup.com and even speed dating. People tell me I need to expose myself but there is only so much I can do with a limited social network.
These days I don't have the energy to try anymore. My depression is beginning to kick in and I don't have anyone I feel comfortable confiding in aside from a therapist. I just feel so isolated from the world and I'm beginning to think perhaps some people were meant to be alone. My therapist says its all within my power to change and I just feel even more discouraged. What more can I do given my limitations?
Romantically I've never been involved with anyone. Perhaps it was a confidence thing or perhaps it was out of fear. Maybe even a little of both. At times I feel discouraged since the entire dating scenario seems awkward. Especially now that I am a bit older but still haven't had any experience romantically. People tell me not to worry, that I will meet someone when I least expect it, but I often doubt these people would take into consideration meeting a person is much more difficult for someone struggling with severe anxiety. Opportunities may arise but how to take advantage of them when you already have so many doubts about yourself?
I've tried counselling on and off for years and have been doing it on a steady basis for the past four years or so. And while I have improved and feel more comfortable around other people I still don't think it's helped in regards to being able to establish a romantic relationship with someone. I still feel doubtful and insecure. Another issue would be the discomfort I have on the idea of being used by men.
It's not like I haven't tried. For awhile I experimented with online dating sites to no avail. Either my inbox would get bombarded by cheesy one-liners by people looking for one thing or the people I've contacted would not respond. I've tried clubbing and quickly established it just isn't the place for me or the place to meet a guy who's interesting in a relationship as opposed to a one-night stand. At the moment I don't have any friends I can go out with and I feel it limits me in terms of meeting other people. I've tried groups on meetup.com and even speed dating. People tell me I need to expose myself but there is only so much I can do with a limited social network.
These days I don't have the energy to try anymore. My depression is beginning to kick in and I don't have anyone I feel comfortable confiding in aside from a therapist. I just feel so isolated from the world and I'm beginning to think perhaps some people were meant to be alone. My therapist says its all within my power to change and I just feel even more discouraged. What more can I do given my limitations?
