Anybody just ... not want love?

[paul]

I know I'm young, but everyone else in my class is all wrapped up in having boyfriends/girlfriends, and some of them are considered pervs, etc...

I don't feel any of this, I guess I've never really had even a crush or anything - I just worry that people will say "wtf, you're not going out with anyone?"

I guess I just don't see the point
anyone else feel like this?

 

[tupac]

i can relate. you probally dont have to worry about anyone teasing you about not having a girlfriend because your still young. im 19 and people ask my friends like why doesnt that guy talk to girls? is he gay? this stated happening around the last year of high school. it is a problem when people ask you why you dont have a girlfriend or ever had one becaus eyou cant really tell you have SA. fuck everything is hard because SA but you just cant keep worrying about stuff like this. who cares what people say. it is more important to overcome SA than to worry about hooking up.

 

[lifesnotfair]

i have given up on Love.. Love sucks.. don't ever fall in love..

 

[ColdFury]

I want love more than anything. Anything to make me feel wanted.

 

[Toad]

Sorry paul, but I would have to say people will start to wonder. Maybe not now, but later...yeah. My parents are always like...so whose your girlfriend?...really annoying...It's all good until your parents start trying to hook you up...yeah...not cool...well I would have to go with ColdFury on this one. I just really want to have someone I would be able to share everything with, but have accepted that if a girl doesn't approach me, I most likely will never have that someone...so...heres to hoping.

 

[ColdAsIce]

Thinking back to when I was at school, if you hadn't of kissed a boy by the age of 12 you were considered a fridge...(I swear no shit!! amongst the "kids" that was our policy at my school!)

I never had a boyfriend at school period, as you can imagin, the kids made my life hell, but my SP held me back from even so much as looking in a boys direction....lol...good old SP!!

I always think if you want to find love never go looking for it, because you won't find it, let him/her come to you. Obviously I'm taking into consideration that most situations are made 10 times worse for SPs, but I can only speak from my experience...all 23 miserable years of it..... :?

 

[black_mamba]

I know I'm young, but everyone else in my class is all wrapped up in having boyfriends/girlfriends, and some of them are considered pervs, etc...

I don't feel any of this, I guess I've never really had even a crush or anything - I just worry that people will say "wtf, you're not going out with anyone?"

I guess I just don't see the point
anyone else feel like this?

I am like this too. In fact, I think it helped me feel comfortable enough in my own shoes so it was easier making friends with the opposite sex as a result. I was a 'late starter' with dating because I wasn't interested and had hobbies instead.

It was never my ambition to be with someone, and at the time it seemed a little odd because well, I don't know why. It's not weird, so why are we under some vague notion of pressure to be with a partner?

I think some folk just aren't comfortable being alone.. *shrugs*

 

[GettingThere]

I miss the companionship, someone to do things with, and also the intimacy. Having a mate/s of the same sex just does not fill that void. A part-time girlfriend would be ideal for me but that is not an easy relationship to find/form.

 

[despise]

i dont want to be loved. my really good friend (who ive known for 2 years) started getting feelings for me...now ive stuffed up our entire friendship because i've been being really mean to him. (by the way he's from the internet...another reason why i just wanted to be friends...) i'd rather him hate me then love me anyway. there was a time when i wanted a boyfriend...but now it just seems like either one or the other gets hurt. i dont want either.

 

[Angie_05]

Sounds like you don't really NEED a girlfriend to have a good time and you should feel good about that. Of course we all want someone to love us, but we should see the qualities in ourselves even if we don't have someone. I have been both single and in relationships, and I love being single. I decided to settle down when I fell in love, by accident. I'm assuming you are in high school also. Trust me, it gets better. People won't always be so interested in your personal life.

 

[lifesnotfair]

the future is pretty dismal for me.. i am not looking forward to it whatsoever

 

[paul]

wow - thanks for the replies everyone -especially people like tupac and lifesnotfair... I thought I was alone on this!

anyway, to answer that questions, I'm actually just in middle school (grade 7)

 

[FruitLooPs]

I just worry that people will say "wtf, you're not going out with anyone?"

I guess I just don't see the point
anyone else feel like this?

While it is ususal to never fancied someone, its not unheard of - you will probably fancy someone sooner or later mate. Grade 7 in middle school is no time to be worried about GF's 8O

People are just curious about go out etc at that age. I have a friend whose 22 now, and has no interest in sex or romance at all as far as i can tell. Thats fine, but 7th grade isn't a time to worry that you'll be like this forever.

At 18 a girl in a car asked me if i'd ever had a girlfriend (she wanted me to go out with her friend) she couldn't believe i'd never had a girlfriend before etc etc, but it wasn't a big deal.

If people cant get over the fact you are single and fine with that then thats there problem, not yours mate.

 

[Angie_05]

anyway, to answer that questions, I'm actually just in middle school (grade 7)

When I was in middle school, boys didn't talk to me. I thought I was ugly or something because of that. I never kissed a boy or talked to one on the phone. I got my first bf when I was 16. Now I'm 21 and I've dated tons and I don't know when/how that all changed. There is life beyond middle school. Don't worry about what they are thinking. Everything changes, majorly.

 

[r0ck0ut04]

Maybe you see no point in having a girlfriend or being in a relationship because you never tried it. You would be surprised if you met a chick with the same interest could be a cool thing, gives you a reason to start your day. I think it does great things for your self esteem and your attitude too. You should start now too cause i dont think it gets any easier when you get older.

 

[ColdFury]

Now I'm 21 and I've dated tons and I don't know when/how that all changed. There is life beyond middle school. Don't worry about what they are thinking. Everything changes, majorly.

I'm 22 and I still have never dated.