Does this sound like OCD?

[WishingICould]

When i was a child i used to switch the light switch off and on a certain number of times and things had to be placed a certain way. Gradually i stopped doing it, that is until a few years ago when it came back even worse. I won't go into details but i've had a lot of stress and all these symptoms and more have come back.

I get horrible thoughts like, if i don't do a certain thing a certain number of times someone will get hurt or die. Sometimes i have to re-do certain things because if i ignore the thoughts they just get worse until i give in. Once i do these "rituals" i feel calm for a while but then another thought creeps in, making me doubt myself and i have to start all over again.

A guy i was involved with got deployed to Afghanistan last year, thankfully he came home alive and well but all the time he was out there my OCD got so bad that i don't know how i got through it. I worried about him 24/7. The thing is, now that he's back i still worry about him. Like, if i hear on the news that a male his age has been killed i automatically wonder if it's him. It's like i've now got this fear that he's going to die if i ignore my OCD.

I know i must sounds nuts but i just don't know how to switch my mind off. I'm just mentally exhausted.

 

[ImNotMyIllness]

YES! I'm going to PM you about my experiences and how I overcame them. Already posted them on this forum, I'll find the links.

 

[conscious_mindz]

Hi after reading your post it does sound like symptoms of OCD but im no doctor, i also have been experiencing the same symptoms & i went to see my GP about it, hes put me onto an OCD group therapy place but my social anxiety is also a problem so group therapy will cause me more stress & anxiety its catch 22, i check things all the time, everytime i go out or come home i count all of my keys & run my fingers along each key a number of times, then il put them on my coat hanger by the door & walk away..then il get a thought enter my mind like i didnt check them properly & the thoughts wont go away until i re check them again & again! im obsessed with alignment & everything has to be neat & "exact" such as my vases in the window all have to be straight & equally seperated & it drives me nuts, i can fully sympathise about how you feel mentally exhausted it is very time consuming & exhausting! i never used to have OCD thoughts etc.. its only up until 3 years ago that the symptoms started but its hard to shake it once it starts, sorry to ramble on i just wanted to comment on this as i suffer from very similar symptoms

 

[Rose_Red]

What you have described sounds as though you may very likely have O.C.D.
I would suggest that you see your doctor about it, but only if you feel comfortable with doing so.

I was diagnosed with O.C.D about two years ago, and I've had symptoms of it my entire life. A psychiatrist gave me medication for it and that caused me rather bad side effects. He did nothing about it when I finally told him, so I stopped the medication and that was that.
A year later, I was referred to another psychiatrist and psychologist by my local doctor and I was re-diagnosed but with severe, almost extreme O.C.D and now I'm on more tolerable medication but accompanied with intensive thearpy.


The reason I am telling you this is because your symptoms can begin to control your life and when it does, it is so much more difficult to recover. What I found out is that the more you put off getting help or advice, the worse it will become. My life is all about my rituals and my thoughts, it's life consuming and I'm literally unable to live my life because of it.
It's only been within the past year or two that my symptoms went from mild to severe/extreme.

 

[ImNotMyIllness]

What you have described sounds as though you may very likely have O.C.D.
I would suggest that you see your doctor about it, but only if you feel comfortable with doing so.

I was diagnosed with O.C.D about two years ago, and I've had symptoms of it my entire life. A psychiatrist gave me medication for it and that caused me rather bad side effects. He did nothing about it when I finally told him, so I stopped the medication and that was that.
A year later, I was referred to another psychiatrist and psychologist by my local doctor and I was re-diagnosed but with severe, almost extreme O.C.D and now I'm on more tolerable medication but accompanied with intensive thearpy.


The reason I am telling you this is because your symptoms can begin to control your life and when it does, it is so much more difficult to recover. What I found out is that the more you put off getting help or advice, the worse it will become. My life is all about my rituals and my thoughts, it's life consuming and I'm literally unable to live my life because of it.
It's only been within the past year or two that my symptoms went from mild to severe/extreme.

If you don't mind me asking. What medication are you currently on?

 

[Rose_Red]

If you don't mind me asking. What medication are you currently on?

My medications always change. The medication I take specifically for obsessive compulsive disorder is paroxetine.
I was previously taking clomipramine, but I didn't react well to it. It's normally what is prescribed for OCD.

 

[ImNotMyIllness]

My medications always change. The medication I take specifically for obsessive compulsive disorder is paroxetine.
I was previously taking clomipramine, but I didn't react well to it. It's normally what is prescribed for OCD.

Thanks! I was taking fluoxetine but decided to quite after only a few weeks. Before I go on any medication again (if I do) it will be after extensive research and a more healthy lifestyle.

 

[Rose_Red]

Thanks! I was taking fluoxetine but decided to quite after only a few weeks. Before I go on any medication again (if I do) it will be after extensive research and a more healthy lifestyle.

If you do decide to try another medication, ask your doctor about paroxetine.
It may be worth while asking about clomipramine, but it's one to be cautious of. Despite it being the recommended medication, it's common to have unpleasant side effects.

 

[WishingICould]

Thank you all for answering my thread. What would be the best way to go about getting some kind of help for my OCD? Do i just go to my GP and say i'm a bit nuts?

Btw RoseRed, i love your avatar. Is that a Waterhouse painting?

 

[theslowesthand]

Sounds almost like you have "Pure-O" OCD :question:

 

[WishingICould]

What's that?

 

[theslowesthand]

Basically, Pure-O (Purely Obsessional OCD, or Primarily Obsessional OCD - OCD without overt compulsions) involves excessive mental rumination, more than excessive compulsions.

Here are a couple of links to look at:
Purely Obsessional OCD - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia (see "Responsibility" and "Violence")
Various Subtypes of Pure O OCD | Beyond Highbrow – Robert Lindsay (see "Harm OCD")

I can't say for sure that you have Pure-O-OCD, or the above sub-types i referred you to, but it's something you may want to investigate further.

 

[Rose_Red]

Thank you all for answering my thread. What would be the best way to go about getting some kind of help for my OCD? Do i just go to my GP and say i'm a bit nuts?

Btw RoseRed, i love your avatar. Is that a Waterhouse painting?

I went to my GP (although about something completely different) and she referred me to a psychologist. If you have a good GP, they will help you get a diagnosis and from there you will receive psychology input.
Your GP may prescribe you the medication, but you'll need a clinical psychologist for therapy.
Some people may only need one of the above, and it will be successful for them. Talking to your GP will help you discover what is best for you.

Do remember that OCD is not something that is easy to recover from, no matter the severity or what your specific symptoms are. If you are dedicated to help yourself, then you'll make progress no matter how difficult it becomes or how long it will take. Don't give up on yourself.



My avatar is a Waterhouse painting, the woman is Ophelia.
I'm glad someone noticed.