I can't get her off my mind

[dannyboy65]

There's this girl I talk to a lot and have been for the whole summer. Thing is I told her so much about myself. I even trusted her enough that I told her I'm schizophrenic. She didn't stop talking to me, and now if I have a schizo moment as I call them (where the voices in my head scream at me) she just wants to hold me when I have them. I never thought I could meet a girl like her.... Thing is she's really shy and scared I'll use her like everyone does. I want to show her I'm not talking to her so much just to get sex. But I have autism too (which I told her and she doesn't mind either) which means I don't know how to make people comfortable without making her feel awkward. I want her to be more then just a friend now and I think she would like that too. But I just don't know how to ask her.

 

[HHDisturbed]

Autism and schizophrenia together, I am sure, makes it difficult at times to make such a great connection. It sounds like you found someone who cares about you for you and that is like hitting the jackpot.

What you DONT want to do is to come on too strong, too fast. Instead you should show her how you feel by doing nice things and being helpful whenever possible. When the moment is right and you two are alone...look her in the eyes, smile softly and say, "Hey (insert her name), I just want you to know that I really like you a lot and enjoy the time we share together." (pause for reply) "Well, I was kinda wondering if you would like to be my girlfriend?" (If she says yes then you win! KISS HER!) If she isn't ready for a steady relationship right now then say, "I understand. But I think you are awesome and I still enjoy the time we share together. But I'm cool with that." Then just keep doing nice/helpful things and she may come around. In a month or so ask her again. If the answer is still "no" then maybe you just be friends and keep looking.

The softer approach above is really the way to go. Just remember, she already likes you for you. So you have already won half the battle! You sound like a really nice guy. I wish you the best and let us know how things go.

 

[ForeverTheWeirdKid]

Dude ask her or she'll friendzone you.

 

[Flanscho]

I think the problem here is this: the more private stuff you tell to a person, the more you bond to that person. If you tell a person a lot of private stuff, that person will be far more important for you, than some person telling you his/her private stuff.
Which means that the reason why you feel so close to her is mostly the result of your actions, not of hers. Which also means that it can backfire very very easily. And that means that you have to be very careful not to overpower her, ask too much or anything, or she'll run away.

 

[sowa]

If you're both shy, ask her thru email. Just tell her u like her and want to know if she'd like to go on a date with u. Also tell her if the answer is no, you're totally ok with that, that u value ur friendship and would not make her uncomfortable by asking again.
She may not be interested, but u have ur foot in the door already by being a good friend so go for it. Just be prepared with a box of tissues and Xanax if she says no ;D Good luck!
(I actually prefer being friends w/a guy b4 dating him. Hoping I get asked soon too)