Ridiculed as a kid?

[Butterfly]

Hi girls and boys!

Do any of you remember people laughing at you when you were kids?

I think my social anxiety is largely due to the awful jokes my aunt used to make. My mum was always there but instead of stopping it she just said nothing; guess she thought I really wasn't pretty like my sister.

This is something I've wanted to ask for quite some time. Finally, I found the courage to start a new thread and talk to so many people at once.

Luv,
B

 

[Angie_05]

I don't remember being ridiculed. I do remember that my friends were so catty to each other. They would always pick someone to gang up on and talk behind their back. that's how people made friends where I am from, by talking badly about other people.

 

[Fighter86]

They would always pick someone to gang up on and talk behind their back. that's how people made friends where I am from, by talking badly about other people.

This sounds like an awful thing to do :? Thankfully, this was not that common where I came from. I wasn't exactly rediculed but there were kids who were mean to me ...for example, they knew I was terrified of creepy crawlies & they actually brought fake ones(yes,I was afraid of these too) to scare the shit out of me, they would too say some mean stuff regarding a person, though no name was mentioned, it was obvious they were refering to me In fact, coming to think of it, I am surprised that I lasted as long as I did throughout all these sort of crap that I had to go through...

 

[Fighter86]

I was ridiculed by most of my peers from 2nd grade through graduation. I know it's a big part of my SP. Also was ridiculed by family and friends for my weight. As an adult my philosophy is if they are that shallow heck with them! But it is still painful :?

I am sorry u had to go through all that, it muz have been tough. Though I don think my was as bad a case as yours, I still felt very bad...so u muz have felt like hell or somthing like that..oh well, at least we have graduated :wink: Thank God! & give our selfs a pat on the back for having made it :lol:

 

[Scottish_Player]

As quiet as i was i was never bullied or picked on as a kid,maybe somthing to do with the fact i have an older brother who has a bit of a reputation.My dad was and still is defenceive for me like if my uncles are around and they make a joke my expence my dad always jumps in and i never get the chance to retaliate which i think in a way has held me back maybe if he just let me deal with it my self i would be ok now,not that iam say that was the problem of it all for me but its silly things like that that all add up and contribute to it anyway iam going a little off topic so i'll stop now

 

[Angie_05]

I've joined in with people who were teasing others before. I did it because I had no confidence in myself. I really think that bullies have self-esteem issues also.

 

[maggie]

i was made fun of a lot by neighbour kids....mostly an ethnic thing cause i was Italian and had some nasty kids living near me and rode the same bus....threw stuff at me and names you can probably imagine....i remember wondering how i was supposed to control my own heritage and why it bothered them...and i have always wondered if that affected how i feel today and the anxiety i feel :roll:

 

[mrkyle]

im non SA, but i got teased heaps as a kid. since i was about 4-9, and then the first few years of high school. i got over it in high school, cuz it was boarding school; and in a place like that, it ends up more a family than a school environment. we could tell each other to get fu*!ed and it didnt mean anything. since high school, i took the opposite stance to many who got teased. instead of changing things people didnt like about me, or hiding them, i just pissed them off more and left it at that. People ended up not caring anymore, and by the end of high school i got along with everyone.

 

[wutnow]

I used to stutter at age 4 and was laughed at by some significant people . I clearly remembering thinking that if I was going to be laughed at, then it certainly wasn't worth talking. I got over the stutter and was too young/ naive/ ignorant to realize how f:cked up the whole deal was.

But you gotta forgive (stock answer). Yeah, you gotta forgive/ forget.

I was also the shortest guy in class, completely unathletic, and of indeterminate ethnicity. So when I hung out with people someone would disparage my heritage without knowing they were speaking of mine (still happens today). So what? You become avoidant - I'd rationalize it with "someone's gonna slip" (aka, say something f:ktup), thus I could isolate myself.

Damn, man, I think I'm losing some momentum.

Still, same thing. Forgive, forget about that sh:t. No other way to deal with it. Some of those unthinking/ incosiderate people are long-gone now or worse off than I ever was, so what does it really matter? I've got to get it together now . Move on, keep going, like I keep telling everyone else :arrow: :arrow: :arrow: .

Gotta work tommorrow anyway.

 

[Nightshade]

I was bullied a lot as a child. My family didn't pick on me, but at school I had a bad time. From my very first year at school until my very last, I was a target for bullies. One of my first memories of school is being surrounded by a group a older children (I only remember seeing their legs around me, although they probably weren't all that tall) who were making a boy kiss me.

Things didn't really improve from there. I do think this had a significant influence on my anxiety problems, but I don't feel any anger towards the bullies, or even myself, anymore.

I should add that as I child I did have quite a bit of anxiety, but I sure wasn't shy or socially anxious (although I was afraid of people crying). Social anxiety developed as I got older.

 

[ScaredGirl]

Thanks for posting this Topic

My childhood is definately a major reason why I am so frightened of other people.

My mother was not mentally stable and most part refused to allow me to leave the house except for school from the age of 5 to 14 (11 years). Yeh, there were times when I was allowed some freedom (cottage on desolate lake). She said she didn't want me out of her sight. Yes there were times when I would go out and play with other children but basically every move I made was monitored, every child I played with was 'bad' or dangerous. Basically she ruined every relationship I had with anyone from the outside world. I'm not angry with her, I know that she was not well.

When I got older I began crawling out the basement window to get human contact...and ended up being with a crowd who are just as neurotic, rejecting and frightened as myself and my family. Perhaps even more because of the female back biting.


I was the youngest by far, my older sibs blamed me for my mothers behavior and turned rejection/punishment in to an artform. They said things were much better before I was born and that I was the the reason mom had problems. Mom passed away 9 years ago and when my father died three years ago my husband insisted we nolonger have contact with them. Things have been much better and I am now begining to heal - heck I can verbalize all this without wigging out.

Obviously I have trouble making friends and keeping them. I get scared, negative then frighten them away. People have complained that I have too much energy, negative energy. I am a good person, and have a possitive view on life; the problem seems to be living it.

My hope is to take responsibility for my phobia, get past it, and be able to walk into a room relaxed enough that I don't scare people away. God Bless you all for being here and thanks for listening.

ScaredGirl

 

[Horatio]

I was a very small kid who first went to school in a small country town, being small I was the natural target for a couple of school bullies as were many others but I dealt with it fine, had a good bunch of friends etc and have many happy memories

But when I moved to the city at age 8 1/2 I wasn't exactly welcomed by my peers. I was beaten physically and emotionally pretty much every day from then through until I left High School in my final year. For the majority of these years I had permanent bruising over my upper body which only went away completely over the summer break. It was never the bruises that upset me the most though, I remember being rediculed and laughed at by my peers both male and female multiple times every single day I attended school.

My experiences at my High School inparticular changed me for the worse and I havent been able to function properly as a person ever since.

High School taught me that I wasnt good enough for anyone, that my only purpose is to be laughed at. And now even though I spend most my time alone in my room where there is noone to laugh, I still hear laughter.

 

[ScaredGirl]

Dear Horation,

My heart goes out to you as I too was rejected at school. You are a beautiful person, and I'm glad you are here on this forum.

Scared Girl

 

[Yossarian]

No but I'm glad you found the courage to start a new thread. It can be tricky at first. Good on you.

 

[unleashed]

yeah. i was abused by pretty much everyone. if people are nice to me i still assume its a trap. sometimes i prefer people to be cold and cynical..at least i know where i am with them.

 

[LittleMissScareAll]

I was constantly ridiculed...however I think my social phobia started before most of the ridicule, but the ridicule of course, just made it that much worse. I've always been quiet, even as a kid, so people have always made stupid comments about my quietness: "Wow, you're so quiet." "Don't you ever talk?" "Can't you talk?" etc... I still get that all the time and I feel like saying "Uhhh yeah, I know myself better than anyone does, so I know I'm quiet. Is that a PROBLEM?"
But anyway, I've been ridiculed pretty much wherever I am, except at home with my parents. I've always had a good home life...it's when I have to get out in the "real world" that really sucks for me. But even my grandma is mean to me. She thinks I'm a loser, a nothing, and says I "can't even carry on a conversation with anybody". :? She said all those things, to my mom. She won't say them to me because she's too cowardly. Some other family members have been rude too, criticizing me for the way I dress, my quietness, other things...I've been called "quare" & "backward" alot even by other family members(aunts, uncles, cousins, etc). It really gets old.
And at school...well, school was basically hell for me. No, hell is too nice a word for it. I doubt hell would even be that cruel. I was always the outcast, the one everybody made fun of and I was even physically hurt in a few situations. It started out that they picked on me because I was a quiet kid, and a few years later I gained quite a bit of weight(and I wasn't a big eater either...I've always been a picky eater and have never ate large amounts so I'm not sure why I gained weight), but of course the weight gain just caused people to be even more cruel, because they had to make fat jokes then. :roll:

 

[karinatwork]

I not only have been laughed at, the kids beat me up regularly, only because I was fat. I had a real tough time in elementary school, it only got better in highschool.
They poured ink over my sunday dress. They waited for me after school outside. They called me names. They threw rotten apples at me. Yeah, childhood was REAL fun. :roll:

 

[clairet]

Yeah i was bullied as a child, although I was probably a bit of a bully too in some ways. Local kids picked on members of my family because our parents were negligent and we were a bit smelly! Also I was beaten up a lot by an older brother (10 years older than me) and like I said, was probably quite an agressive child (verbally-had a foul mouth and still have!) I think this definately has something to do with the social anxiety I feel now, I am very suspicious of people (always expect the worst) and push people away by over reacting to things :?