Too shy to ask out girl of my dreams

[lostboy]

Hi all

I have recently found out that someone that I have liked for a long time is not seeeing anyone and I would like to ask her out touble is I am too
shy to approch her, she dosent know me . Im in my late twenties and never had a girlfriend and find it difficult speaking to girls. Her friend works in a shop and I was planning to go in and speak to her only am even too embarased to do that. would be grateful for any advice


thanks

 

[Danfalc]

Hey Lostboy

Wish i could give you some better advice, but is she is the girl of your dreams, go for it!
Okay it could not turn out how you would like it too,but if you dont ask you will never know!

p.s Im not an expert on the opposite sex at all, and i know this might be hard for you to do,but i would strongly recomend speaking to her rather than speaking to her mate,even if you come across as nervous or shy at least she knows you had the guts to come and speak to her face 2 face

 

[Rossettismuse1]

Ask her out. She will not come to you.

Ask her out. Ask her out. Take that risk.

The altenertative is a life of avoidance and loneliness.

DO IT.

 

[J]

Ask her out. She will not come to you.

Ask her out. Ask her out. Take that risk.

The altenertative is a life of avoidance and loneliness.

DO IT.

Rossetismuse is absolutely right. Do it even if it seems liek it's gonna kill you. Try, and if you fail, well, you know she's not for you and you can move on. Don't try, and you'll always think "it could be/have been possible" and you'll beat yourself up forever over it. Try and succeed, and, well, then you're where you wanna be!

 

[FruitLooPs]

Just dont follow in my footsteps, pretty similar situation to you.

Cept I knew the person, and have wanted to ask them out for years and never did - they are taken now of course heh. :? I had the inside word she liked me all that time ago aswell, and I procrastinated it all away...

Spent those years maintaining weekly txts and no more haha, so ridiculous really. I guess she spent a good while waiting for me to do something, but in the end even the nicest person won't wait forever.

One day I will learn, one day

 

[black_mamba]

Lostboy, grumblina's idea is certainly worth a try, and letters have the added bonus of seeming extra romantic.

Be simple, to the point and honest. You do not need to mention your lack of experience however as its irrelevant.

Good luck, I hope you go for it.

 

[Cryptolysergick]

Ive tried the letter thing before, it pretty much got me admitted into a mental ward, but it probably depended on how I wrote it. Theres always chlorofome. but the letter is definately worth a try, dont make it seem like you are in love or soemthing though, just say you are shy, she might understand.

 

[Angie_05]

I admire a guy who can face his fears and speak to me directly. It's okay if you appear shy. She is not going to think you are a loser for it, she might like it more than any other way.

If I were that girl, I would want you to make acquaintences with me first. You know, chat a little. Make small talk. Then ask her if she would like to go out. It's better to ask her out to a specific place or to do a specific activity than to just plan a date in general.

Good luck. We are all rooting for you.

 

[mrblack]

sorry i did not read any one elses reply but, do not approach her for a date if you don't know her well. First get over your shyness (or learn to control it), and become comfrotable talking with women just as friends. Pick up on that small talk, and learn to be relaxed around her. She will sense this lack of desperateness in almost all guys that may try to hit on her, and distinguish you as someone in an interest category.

 

[Sue]

personaly, i would go with the letter idea. once it deosnt turn into a letter relationship like mne did :? that was stupid on my part

 

[Richey]

Remember that The kernal tried 1090 times before he was able to succesfully open his Kentucky Fried Chicken business.
It can be a hard climb but even if you try 20 times and it doesn't work out just remember what the kernal had to go through and so many other people.
There is no garuentee for anything working out the way you picture it before it happens. Unless it was an ideal world of course.

Try to loosen yourself up a bit when you go somewhere. Think about your goals and subjects that you are interested in instead of what others are thinking of you.
I also recommend people to look into studying communication and english because they do help in the shyness area.
Imagine yourself riding down the street on a bike with people throwing eggs at you from everywhere!! initially that may seem daunting but if you keep riding then the eggs will stop and your confidence to handle that situation will increase.

 

[young]

how is she the girl of your dreams if she doesn't even know you?

 

[coolguy2005]

I've never asked a girl out too but here is what I think:

You need to work on your confidence. You also need to be an 'interesting person' which means knowning what's going on in general. Reading the newspaper will help you make small talk.

I think working out is important too. When you have a fairly builty body, not only do you appear more 'manly', but your posture and voice change--your attitude, behaviour, and the actions change. Keep in mind that it is not the physical part which plays the main part in attracting women, it is the confidence which is DERIVED from having that body.

I know the theory but I haven't been able to put into practice. Does anybody have any suggestions on how to put all these theories into praactice?

 

[young]

so you're saying that relationships are based on appearance? and that this whole world is a superficial place of existance?

well for the most part. anyways it is...

 

[4myself]

I actually have to agree with Young here, I was a bit puzzled when you said she is the girl of your dreams and then it appears you go on and say that you dont actually know her?, maybe I read it wrong. Anyway I also agree with Mr Black, work at getting to know her a bit better first and letting her get to know you, then you will become more comfortable around her and at the very least you could develop a solid friendship. Good luck, I hope things work out between you and her!.