Aussiegunner
New member
Hello to everyone im new to this forum and firstly hope that everyone would win their axiety including me.
I want to talk about my problem which im facing for about 4-5 years.
I think its OCD but not sure so would be glad if you guys could help me.
its hard to explain in words, but ill try:
I have this thoughts of always trying to live in a particular way. For example i tell myself that i have to study more and make timetables where i dont care of anything else but study. The next thing i try to do is studying for hours and after a day or so get a headache and just let go of myself for a period of time where i get rid of these thoughts.
A few days later some force inside me tells me i should again reorganize and change myself this time i try to live really healthy and srtictly alter my diet like banning all kind of junk food, chocolates and sweets. Again like the first example i gave you.
I find it really hard to keep on living like this and thoughts race through my mind which finally results in me letting go of my plans and just being messy and careless.
This always occurs to me, i always try to live my life with internal rules i put on myself that i get a feeling inside me that tells i need to so that i could be better.
At the start of this wierd thing, it was based on me trying to be very neat like a perfectionist. Like i always tried to walk straight, even was uncomfortable when sitting somewhere because i had to think on which position to sit, i always had to talk perfectly with no slang terms, sleep straight on my back with my head placed right in the middle of the bed. My room had to be very clean and tidy i even started to clean the walls of my room and finally everythibg had to be symmetrcial. These are the stuff i remember, there could be more though.
All these stuff make me unhappy, i also have social anxiety but im see that im starting to overcome it and have improved abit.
ok, so this is my problem what do you think it is?
Is it a phycological disorder or something to do with chemicals in my brain?
Have any of you faced such behaviours or am i a one of a kind?
Thanks for reading.
I want to talk about my problem which im facing for about 4-5 years.
I think its OCD but not sure so would be glad if you guys could help me.
its hard to explain in words, but ill try:
I have this thoughts of always trying to live in a particular way. For example i tell myself that i have to study more and make timetables where i dont care of anything else but study. The next thing i try to do is studying for hours and after a day or so get a headache and just let go of myself for a period of time where i get rid of these thoughts.
A few days later some force inside me tells me i should again reorganize and change myself this time i try to live really healthy and srtictly alter my diet like banning all kind of junk food, chocolates and sweets. Again like the first example i gave you.
I find it really hard to keep on living like this and thoughts race through my mind which finally results in me letting go of my plans and just being messy and careless.
This always occurs to me, i always try to live my life with internal rules i put on myself that i get a feeling inside me that tells i need to so that i could be better.
At the start of this wierd thing, it was based on me trying to be very neat like a perfectionist. Like i always tried to walk straight, even was uncomfortable when sitting somewhere because i had to think on which position to sit, i always had to talk perfectly with no slang terms, sleep straight on my back with my head placed right in the middle of the bed. My room had to be very clean and tidy i even started to clean the walls of my room and finally everythibg had to be symmetrcial. These are the stuff i remember, there could be more though.
All these stuff make me unhappy, i also have social anxiety but im see that im starting to overcome it and have improved abit.
ok, so this is my problem what do you think it is?
Is it a phycological disorder or something to do with chemicals in my brain?
Have any of you faced such behaviours or am i a one of a kind?
Thanks for reading.