this may be a read this is you one and only heads up 
Hello, ima call myself Mr B here, im 24 working in hospitallity, living in wellington new zealand in a flat with 3 of my closest friends.my imediate family consists of my mum,aunty, uncle,cousin and her husband pretty small but without them theres not a chance in hell id be where i am now. im reasonably fit going to the gym 4 times a week and also do muay thai kickboxing at least once a week. i also live for the weekends going out and sociallising with my mates and possibly a bit of excess alcohol
to start here is little bit about my life before agoraphobia, im from a pretty good family went to school completed and had a fairly normal life in this respect. my dad died when i was tweleve which was really hard and a few other key things happened around this time that threw things a bit for me personally. never the less i was a reasonably confident young man and made accauqtinces easily when i moved from my home town to boarding school in the city. at secondary school(high school) i did ok but was much rather interested in causing trouble of the cheeky mischevious type which often brought attention to myself and made my grades suffer ever so slightly haha. i moved out of home and boarding school when i was 15 and so after fell in with a bad crowd of older people who were absolutely terrible role models for an impressionable young man. i had started drinking and smoking smokes and pot at 13 but around this point in my life pot was an all day every day thing and i started to dabble into other things. i also started to get into trouble with the police which obviously ment i was doing certain things that im not proud of. i believe i had alot issues from the things that happened around the time my father died that i had supressed and were strating to finally come out but i wasnt prepared or ready to deal with. there was alot of anger, bad decisons and moments in this point that im not proud of BUT i would not change a thing because had i not done these things i could not have learnt from them, meaning i wouldnt be who i am now and who im going to be.
first impressions.
i had recently turned 18. about three days before i took acid and hit 8 bongs in a row. this was the worse trip ever i swear i was on the verge of losing it and i really had to battle the trip, luckily a point came where i realised what goes up must come down i was going to ride it out and make damn sure i never put myself in that postion again and thats what i did, to this day i will never touch any hallucogens again. anyway im sitting in a park with my girlfriend everything is good, i remember looking at a cloud in the distance then suddenly feeling very weird, at that moment **** got real, i started to struggle breathing felt like the world was closing in, and wanted to get out of dodge before empending doom got me. i shurgged off the incident but in solidarity put it down to that trip had messed some wires in my brain and i was possibly never gunna be the same again. it is more than likely that the trip is what set off my agoraphobia, but i have to come to learn my brain is not scrambled and there is a way out, the key is yourself.
turn the page.
for five years untill i was 23 i would get panic attacks when out in open spaces, i will note not all the time, but as time went on it got more and more frequent and more intense. if i was walking home and felt the panic start to kick in i would start running, this helped but it also made me feel really weird as if anyone saw me they must be thinking "look at that guy he must be nuts". i sure as hell didnt tell anyone what was going on and made really lame excuses to get out of situations where i may have to go into uncomfortable places. but inside i really resented this ****, i semi thought i was going crazy, i felt like there was no way out which made me rather unhappy about my postion in life. one day a programme came on about agoraphobia, i didnt watch the whole thing but it was about people who had symptoms so bad they couldnt even leave the house. i wasnt this bad but after a quick google search of agoraphobia finally there was a name and even better a sense of not feeling completely isolated for what i had expierienced.
enough is enough.
being the typical male, i failed to act on any sort of help for my anxiety untill one day i was walking into the city with some friends when we encountered a long strech with no roofs or cover to duck below. we were stopped at lights for the motorway out of the city and i began to panic badly by far the worst of any i had gone through. i could hardly breathe, i started to sweat and the world was closing in so hard i was close to blacking out. somehow i managed through it and evetually was back in the warmth and saftey of the city and its cover, but i knew now i really had to do something about it. when i got home i searched agoraphobia once again looked up all i could on how to beat it. i came across a progamme called, easycalm by a man named jon mercer, it was an video epsiode series that step by step will help you through anxiety and panic attacks. i shelled out the cash got the programme and finally was on my way to beating agorphobia.
that was then, this is now.
since getting the programme things have got signifinatlly better, im not a hundred percent better but im far from who i was 6 months ago. not only has anxiety gotten better but there have been other really great changes in my life. i plan to move to australia to work in januaury and travel though asia then to europe from there, and im for sure not going to let life pass me by. from things i have learned about anxiety i know its beatable but also once uou start to beat it then you can really start to live and do the things you want to do with your life but only if you believe you can, which you can!! the first step is to take action!! stop looking at yourself as a victim and looking for reasons to support this, start looking at yourself as you really are no matter who you are, and that is an intelligent person who wants the good things from life and with a little belief and work will get it. i say this becuase if you weren't then you sure as hell wouldnt have read this far but you also wouldnt have bothered to join this forum and look for ways to improve your situation.
i sincerely hope that you have enjoyed my story can relate to some of things i have said and with a little luck get inspired to start pushing your own boundaries and beat this bull**** trick your mind has played upon you then start to enjoy life and all it has to offer. i will try and update on how things are going for me and hopefully even post pictures of my travels(something a year ago i didnt think was possible) to show you that agoraphobia/anxiety is not a prison sentence and it doesnt have to govern your life. thanks for reading and good luck not that you'll need it once you realise how anxiety really works.
Hello, ima call myself Mr B here, im 24 working in hospitallity, living in wellington new zealand in a flat with 3 of my closest friends.my imediate family consists of my mum,aunty, uncle,cousin and her husband pretty small but without them theres not a chance in hell id be where i am now. im reasonably fit going to the gym 4 times a week and also do muay thai kickboxing at least once a week. i also live for the weekends going out and sociallising with my mates and possibly a bit of excess alcohol
to start here is little bit about my life before agoraphobia, im from a pretty good family went to school completed and had a fairly normal life in this respect. my dad died when i was tweleve which was really hard and a few other key things happened around this time that threw things a bit for me personally. never the less i was a reasonably confident young man and made accauqtinces easily when i moved from my home town to boarding school in the city. at secondary school(high school) i did ok but was much rather interested in causing trouble of the cheeky mischevious type which often brought attention to myself and made my grades suffer ever so slightly haha. i moved out of home and boarding school when i was 15 and so after fell in with a bad crowd of older people who were absolutely terrible role models for an impressionable young man. i had started drinking and smoking smokes and pot at 13 but around this point in my life pot was an all day every day thing and i started to dabble into other things. i also started to get into trouble with the police which obviously ment i was doing certain things that im not proud of. i believe i had alot issues from the things that happened around the time my father died that i had supressed and were strating to finally come out but i wasnt prepared or ready to deal with. there was alot of anger, bad decisons and moments in this point that im not proud of BUT i would not change a thing because had i not done these things i could not have learnt from them, meaning i wouldnt be who i am now and who im going to be.
first impressions.
i had recently turned 18. about three days before i took acid and hit 8 bongs in a row. this was the worse trip ever i swear i was on the verge of losing it and i really had to battle the trip, luckily a point came where i realised what goes up must come down i was going to ride it out and make damn sure i never put myself in that postion again and thats what i did, to this day i will never touch any hallucogens again. anyway im sitting in a park with my girlfriend everything is good, i remember looking at a cloud in the distance then suddenly feeling very weird, at that moment **** got real, i started to struggle breathing felt like the world was closing in, and wanted to get out of dodge before empending doom got me. i shurgged off the incident but in solidarity put it down to that trip had messed some wires in my brain and i was possibly never gunna be the same again. it is more than likely that the trip is what set off my agoraphobia, but i have to come to learn my brain is not scrambled and there is a way out, the key is yourself.
turn the page.
for five years untill i was 23 i would get panic attacks when out in open spaces, i will note not all the time, but as time went on it got more and more frequent and more intense. if i was walking home and felt the panic start to kick in i would start running, this helped but it also made me feel really weird as if anyone saw me they must be thinking "look at that guy he must be nuts". i sure as hell didnt tell anyone what was going on and made really lame excuses to get out of situations where i may have to go into uncomfortable places. but inside i really resented this ****, i semi thought i was going crazy, i felt like there was no way out which made me rather unhappy about my postion in life. one day a programme came on about agoraphobia, i didnt watch the whole thing but it was about people who had symptoms so bad they couldnt even leave the house. i wasnt this bad but after a quick google search of agoraphobia finally there was a name and even better a sense of not feeling completely isolated for what i had expierienced.
enough is enough.
being the typical male, i failed to act on any sort of help for my anxiety untill one day i was walking into the city with some friends when we encountered a long strech with no roofs or cover to duck below. we were stopped at lights for the motorway out of the city and i began to panic badly by far the worst of any i had gone through. i could hardly breathe, i started to sweat and the world was closing in so hard i was close to blacking out. somehow i managed through it and evetually was back in the warmth and saftey of the city and its cover, but i knew now i really had to do something about it. when i got home i searched agoraphobia once again looked up all i could on how to beat it. i came across a progamme called, easycalm by a man named jon mercer, it was an video epsiode series that step by step will help you through anxiety and panic attacks. i shelled out the cash got the programme and finally was on my way to beating agorphobia.
that was then, this is now.
since getting the programme things have got signifinatlly better, im not a hundred percent better but im far from who i was 6 months ago. not only has anxiety gotten better but there have been other really great changes in my life. i plan to move to australia to work in januaury and travel though asia then to europe from there, and im for sure not going to let life pass me by. from things i have learned about anxiety i know its beatable but also once uou start to beat it then you can really start to live and do the things you want to do with your life but only if you believe you can, which you can!! the first step is to take action!! stop looking at yourself as a victim and looking for reasons to support this, start looking at yourself as you really are no matter who you are, and that is an intelligent person who wants the good things from life and with a little belief and work will get it. i say this becuase if you weren't then you sure as hell wouldnt have read this far
but you also wouldnt have bothered to join this forum and look for ways to improve your situation. i sincerely hope that you have enjoyed my story can relate to some of things i have said and with a little luck get inspired to start pushing your own boundaries and beat this bull**** trick your mind has played upon you then start to enjoy life and all it has to offer. i will try and update on how things are going for me and hopefully even post pictures of my travels(something a year ago i didnt think was possible) to show you that agoraphobia/anxiety is not a prison sentence and it doesnt have to govern your life. thanks for reading and good luck not that you'll need it once you realise how anxiety really works.