Trying not to let it get to me

kaycee09

Member
I thought things were turning around for me.
I landed two part-time jobs to support my son and I, I was approved for my full student loan for my course in September, and a large portion of the loan is going to paid for by a grant.

Then I lost my vehicle.

I always take my vehicle to a garage that is owned by one of my dad's friends, the benefit being that I generally have to pay a little bit less for my repairs, the down side being that they refuse to communicate directly with me because they see me as little more than a child.

My vehicle had gone in to get the brake pads replaced; but it turns out the garage called my dad and said that it needed close to 1000.00 worth of work to be safe for the road.

Let it be stated here that I haven't worked in close to a year; I don't have a thousand dollars, I don't have forty dollars, and my parents are well aware of this situation; so, when the garage contacted my father, as opposed to contacting me to discuss if and when I could get the work done, he gave them the go ahead to do the work then called me right before my first shift at work and told me I owe the garage all of this money I don't have for the work I didn't approve.

After my shift that night, my dad told me that he and mom are going to pay for the repairs and I can pay them back. While it's a nice gesture, it couldn't be a worse arrangement. First of all, money is already tight for my parents because dad blows all their money at the horse races and the casino; second, my parents are the type of people who hold it over my head when I owe them money.

Literally every time I do something like check my phone or my laptop, they'll say something like 'you shouldn't be wasting your time with that stupid thing, you should be picking up extra shifts to pay us back.' Like I don't already feel bad enough for taking their money and living in their house.

I did find a low-income housing program in my area that seemed like a viable solution, but when I tried to bring it up to my parents they totally lost it. It got really ugly, but suffice it to say they indicated that they would go to any lengths necessary to prevent me from taking my son with me.

I know there is absolutely nothing they can do to stop me within the law, but I'm not going to let my guard down over something trivial like law; I know better.

I'm feeling trapped; like I'm suffocating.
I'm getting yelled at for the hours I do work, and for the hours I don't work.
I'm getting yelled at for making minimum wage.
I'm getting guilt tripped into doing EVERYTHING around here because I owe money.
I'm being threatened for considering moving out.

I'm trying to stay bubbly about it so that the stress can't touch my work or social life, but I'm starting to retreat from people around me and snap for no reason. My mood swings, anxiety and other stuff are becoming totally unbearable, but I'm trying to stay strong for the people around me, because I'm so damn sick of coming across as needy and whiny.

I just don't know if I can keep it up. :kickingmyself:
 
Ouch! Maybe in future forewarn the mechanic that he does not have the authority to do any other extra work, regardless of the problem, because you can't afford it at the moment. Many of them will milk what they can out customers, unfortunately.

my parents are the type of people who hold it over my head when I owe them money

This is a real pity if they're doing this, I hope things improve soon
 
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