Hello you guys,
I am new here, so I want to tell you a bit about my story before addressing my current issues.
It all started in 2009 when I moved from Germany to NYC. I had a UTI and then it wouldn't go away. I feared I would have something called Interstitial Cystitis, something I was diagnosed with last summer, finally, after seeing many, many doctors, even spe******ts. She also diagnosed me with leaky gut and vulvodynia. (IC is something like a chronic bladder infection, often coupled with other illnesses in that area of the body, like IBS, leaky gut, etc).
I started treatment (mainly homeopathic, diet, supplements and one strong overactive bladder medication) last summer. It's been a year and things have not changed.
Due to this constant need to urinate, I have extreme problems of doing things in public, since there is a constant fear of not finding a bathroom. I went to see a cognitive behavioural therapist two years ago. She couldn't help me at all.
I try to not let this fear get so close to me that I don't leave my house anymore - no - I traveled to Italy last year, and Sweden, although by myself, since I always feel like I am a nuisance to other people ("Sorry, have to go to the bathroom again"…). My boyfriend of 10 months and me wanted to go on a spontaneous trip to Paris in the spring and I couldn't do it - just because of my anxiety revolving around this issue.
Now here is the deal: Yes, if I drink a lot, I have peeing frequency, of course. Also when I am at home. But: I sleep nights through, and when I sit on my couch, I can go 4-5 hours not using the bathroom. The moment I need to leave the house, I start to sweat, my bladder feels strange, I have no control over it, my heart starts beating really fast and I can't sit still. When I walk or sit, it doesn't matter, I have the constant feeling of needing the bathroom. It's this weird pressure sitting somewhere in my lower stomach and it's driving me insane. it has gotten so much worse over the past few weeks. Uni has started again and my boyfriend went abroad for 5 months and I have trouble dealing with it all - lot's of stress. I think this adds to it as well.
I have trouble sitting through lectures or seminars, to the point where I don't even go in the first place. I am scared of speeches, group presentations, all that. I have become such a loner, but I am trying to not let that happen. i still meet friends, but they think I am odd, and I never really tell anyone completely about my condition, only vaguely. Not even my boyfriend knows. yesterday I started crying in front of one of my best friends and I told her everything about it. We talked about how I want to start to try some anxiety medication.
I know my condition is physical. I have light IC (no pain, just urgency and frequency), pretty bad gut issues, but as I said, at home I am ok. I never have trouble falling asleep due to pains or anything, so it's not severe. But I think what resulted out of this is a severe anxiety disorder coupled with my physical condition.
I have tried everything for 5 years - diet, PT, therapist, yoga, meditation, running, … Nothing works. I am not someone who would go advocate medication… But I think I have no other chance.
Does anybody here have a similar condition?
Could you tell me if you think anxiety medication is something I could try?
I was thinking of Valium or Xanax, definitely would NOT want to try SSRI medication, as I am completely against it! I want to get informed a bit better before I ask my psychologist about a referral.
I hope someone here has some insightful words.
Sorry for writing so much, and thanks for reading!
mg:
lamaga :shyness:
I am new here, so I want to tell you a bit about my story before addressing my current issues.
It all started in 2009 when I moved from Germany to NYC. I had a UTI and then it wouldn't go away. I feared I would have something called Interstitial Cystitis, something I was diagnosed with last summer, finally, after seeing many, many doctors, even spe******ts. She also diagnosed me with leaky gut and vulvodynia. (IC is something like a chronic bladder infection, often coupled with other illnesses in that area of the body, like IBS, leaky gut, etc).
I started treatment (mainly homeopathic, diet, supplements and one strong overactive bladder medication) last summer. It's been a year and things have not changed.
Due to this constant need to urinate, I have extreme problems of doing things in public, since there is a constant fear of not finding a bathroom. I went to see a cognitive behavioural therapist two years ago. She couldn't help me at all.
I try to not let this fear get so close to me that I don't leave my house anymore - no - I traveled to Italy last year, and Sweden, although by myself, since I always feel like I am a nuisance to other people ("Sorry, have to go to the bathroom again"…). My boyfriend of 10 months and me wanted to go on a spontaneous trip to Paris in the spring and I couldn't do it - just because of my anxiety revolving around this issue.
Now here is the deal: Yes, if I drink a lot, I have peeing frequency, of course. Also when I am at home. But: I sleep nights through, and when I sit on my couch, I can go 4-5 hours not using the bathroom. The moment I need to leave the house, I start to sweat, my bladder feels strange, I have no control over it, my heart starts beating really fast and I can't sit still. When I walk or sit, it doesn't matter, I have the constant feeling of needing the bathroom. It's this weird pressure sitting somewhere in my lower stomach and it's driving me insane. it has gotten so much worse over the past few weeks. Uni has started again and my boyfriend went abroad for 5 months and I have trouble dealing with it all - lot's of stress. I think this adds to it as well.
I have trouble sitting through lectures or seminars, to the point where I don't even go in the first place. I am scared of speeches, group presentations, all that. I have become such a loner, but I am trying to not let that happen. i still meet friends, but they think I am odd, and I never really tell anyone completely about my condition, only vaguely. Not even my boyfriend knows. yesterday I started crying in front of one of my best friends and I told her everything about it. We talked about how I want to start to try some anxiety medication.
I know my condition is physical. I have light IC (no pain, just urgency and frequency), pretty bad gut issues, but as I said, at home I am ok. I never have trouble falling asleep due to pains or anything, so it's not severe. But I think what resulted out of this is a severe anxiety disorder coupled with my physical condition.
I have tried everything for 5 years - diet, PT, therapist, yoga, meditation, running, … Nothing works. I am not someone who would go advocate medication… But I think I have no other chance.
Does anybody here have a similar condition?
Could you tell me if you think anxiety medication is something I could try?
I was thinking of Valium or Xanax, definitely would NOT want to try SSRI medication, as I am completely against it! I want to get informed a bit better before I ask my psychologist about a referral.
I hope someone here has some insightful words.
Sorry for writing so much, and thanks for reading!
mg:lamaga :shyness:
