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Old 04-07-2006  
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Default What do you say when people see you fearful/nervous?

When a person sees your uncomfortable, fearful, very nervous, and they say to you why are you so cared at the world etc.What do you say to them?

I remember one time i was doing a employment program and one guy said why are are you so scared at everything.I was really taken aback at what he said, cause i didnt think i was that bad at the time.

I felt angry when the guy said that to me.Has anyone ever had something similar happen with a stranger?
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Old 04-07-2006  
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I been told im boring and that i have no personality! from my dad and people at work, you just have to try and use it in your favour by trying to look more confident in front of people and to feel comfortable
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Old 04-07-2006  
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Good question.

I did a course last year aiming to get back into the workforce, I thought it would help with my shyness and improve my confidence (little did I know at the time it was actually SA, which I have since been diagnosed with). If anything this course made things worse, I was for ever being used as an example because I was the 'shy' one of the group (eg. someone like myself wouldn't go to work in customer service etc). Then I had one of the lady's there ask why I was so shy? What sorta question is that? Then because I didn't have an answer for her, she went on to ask about my childhood, what's with that?

Comments like these certainly don't help things.
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Old 04-07-2006  
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I've had people say things to me like, "Why don't you talk more?" or "Why are you so quite?". I never know what to say to that. What I should say is that I'm deathly afraid that if I open my mouth and interact with people i'm gonna embarrass myself and talking to people gives me a great deal of anxiety. So the way I cope with it is by avoiding conversations and being around people in general. But I never do.. I just shrug my shoulders.
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Old 04-07-2006  
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yeah i hate that...like when someone asks "are you shy or just quiet?". itso so annoying...i dont want people to prying into my problems like that. its just embarassing. i usually just mumble something incomprehendable or mumble "i dunno...both i guess" and hope they will just go away and stop asking.
or else when i ever actually do speak in front of someone they say "oh wow i didnt realise you actually knew how to talk".
freaking idiots.
no wonder i dont like to talk if theyr gonna make comments like that.
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Old 04-07-2006  
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Its all about training your mind to react differently to people and sometimes the anxiety can take over and cause us to feel like we owe people something. We just have to learn to feel atease with thoughts and to try and relax around people, when my dad said to me that i had no personality i should have reacted and asked him why he would just come out with such a brash! statement and why instead of telling me my weaknesses and faults why not try and help me out instead of talking me down all the time, but i reacted all offended and unworthy and thats what i have to change, i have to stop worrying about what others think of me, it can be hard though when it happens every day, i find that for me at work in the restaraunt that i work every conversation is riddled with awkwardness and people will say anything to escape and run off, i just want to enjoy! myself but its hard when your not always loud and expressive
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