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Old 06-18-2008  
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Shyguest's Avatar

Default Why am I shy with my own family

This is a really depressing situation I am in. I'm a social phobia who feels phobic about being in the presence of some members of my family. Why is this the case? I really don't know what to do and the people I am allright with are making me feel guilty about not being able to so******e with my own family.

Also, the more often I get used to going somewhere like an office or something the more social phobic I get about going there, which is why I kept leaving work.

Anyone else relate to anything I have written here?

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Old 06-18-2008  
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Lexmark's Avatar


Do you live with your family ?
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Old 06-18-2008  
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Possibly.. I have a hard time talking to some members of my family. I get awkward, don't know what to say, uncomfortable.. I avoid situations with them.. etc. ;o

And yes. I get more shy the longer I go somewhere.. but once I get over that hump, it gets better.. I think. O_o
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Old 06-18-2008  
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My SA is there with family members, all of them outside my immediate family...those I live with I'm just fine with.

Even my parents, my twin sister and grandparents I have problems with...all of them.
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Old 06-18-2008  
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I too get it with family, but i get with everyone, as i sort of grew up in a hostile house-hold, the chemistry of everyone living under the same roof didn't bring us that closer together ...

i think it would have been easier had everything been more chilled out and relaxed ...but there was fighting, arguments daily ...

so that made it harder for me and i reacted by being passive agressive . ..

so it really depends on the personalities and relationship of everyone in your family ..its not always because of anxiety ..
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Old 06-18-2008  
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_Brittany_'s Avatar


I'm not 100% comfortable with any of my family members so I know how you feel. It sucks cause our families are the people we should feel closet to.
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Old 06-18-2008  
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I have this, I think it's because I feel my family were so critical of me as a child. If they critisise me now, I will defend myself, but it is always tricky. A stranger however is unlikely to critisise me, and of they do, well, we will keep this nice!

Peace xxx
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Old 06-18-2008  
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I only feel comfortable when I'm alone.
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Old 06-19-2008  
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I am the same way around my family. About a year ago my parents sat me down for a discussion about the fact that I had yet to find a job and their frustration because of it. During the conversation I broke out into a cold sweat the same as I would with strangers. My parents could see it plain as day and seemed concerned by it, though even that scenario hardly seemed enough to convince them of the true crippling extent of my anxiety.

Now, a year later, I no longer stay with my parents and instead live with my sister. I can barely carry on a conversation with her without feeling awkward and nervous, and so I remain rather quiet around her most of the time. I usually only speak when spoken to and spend a lot of time alone in the back room watching movies and online.
As for my parents, I have barely acknowledged it, but evidently I don't feel very comfortable around them at all now. Father's Day was the first time I had spoken to my Dad in weeks, and I haven't been to my parents' home when they were actually there in a month, even though they live right down the road. The bond between my family and I seems to have all but dissipated and I'm not certain if that will change any time soon.
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Old 06-19-2008  
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I still talk to my mom. I email my sister, and once in a while I talk to her on the phone. I can't stand her husband. The man can be so obnoxious. My brother I feel the worse over. I have not talked to him in several years. There are anger issues there along with social anxiety. The things he did and said to me over the years were pretty bad. He always has this suck it up mentality which I can't stand. So now my world consists of my wife, and my in laws. I feel for you guys, I really do! What do you do when you feel like your alergic to your own family? :(
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