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Old 03-13-2011  
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Default Re: Why do love-shy men NOT want to show they like/love a woman?

In my experience its that you tell someone youre interested and theyre not, theres an awkwardness filling the air each time you see this person, they know youre attracted to them, and you know they dont care. Better imo to say nothing and let it go away

Misa: I would never dream about living in a world without Light.
L: Yes, that would be dark.
(Death Note)
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Old 03-13-2011  
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Default Re: Why do love-shy men NOT want to show they like/love a woman?

Maybe because, EVEN if i manage to have reasonable conversation with, EVEN if i know she "likes" me - i just "KNOW" that i'll "drop the ball" when it comes to flirting, showing my interest, & asking her out (ie my true nerves/inexperience will surface, & she will reject me accordingly). And i just CANNOT TAKE any frustrations/rejection in this area. My self-worth cannot handle it, and it is just plain UNNECESSARY stress/suffering. Its not worth the risk.
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Old 03-13-2011  
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Default Re: Why do love-shy men NOT want to show they like/love a woman?

Simple, shy men are not confident.. They are shy because they are not confident with themselves... They believe they arent good enough or have something that would repel people away from them... Thats the only reason I hesistate with women, I am more confident now though it is a difficult thing to approach women and it takes practice..

Its hard form most men to do it.. but people with more secure attitudes/confidence wont find it as difficult as insecure people.. Build yourself and make something out of yourself and you will start seeing the world from a new perspective..

Its all up to you.. You are in charge of yourself and your life..

Last edited by Honda; 03-13-2011 at 12:49 PM..
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Old 04-22-2011  
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Default Re: Why do love-shy men NOT want to show they like/love a woman?

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Originally Posted by Honda View Post
Simple, shy men are not confident.. They are shy because they are not confident with themselves... They believe they arent good enough or have something that would repel people away from them... Thats the only reason I hesistate with women, I am more confident now though it is a difficult thing to approach women and it takes practice..

Its hard form most men to do it.. but people with more secure attitudes/confidence wont find it as difficult as insecure people.. Build yourself and make something out of yourself and you will start seeing the world from a new perspective..
That's how i feel. I'm not totally shy but when in big crowds i go quiet, or when it comes to expressing how i feel i lie because i find it very hard to let people know how i am feeling. The feeling i get when i sometimes do let someone know how i am feeling makes me feel like an ***, which is why i like hiding it and telling lies because i feel normal then.
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Old 11-01-2011  
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Default Re: Why do love-shy men NOT want to show they like/love a woman?

28 year old, with SAD, Few hundred buck, lousy car stuck with 7 year installment and a no so fancy job. Even if i want to confess my love... how would any sane girl in this world will say yes? i know i wouldn't. haha... no matter how nice or how good i can treat her... without money... it just hopeless.
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Old 12-23-2011  
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Default Re: Why do love-shy men NOT want to show they like/love a woman?

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Originally Posted by RedMonkey View Post
28 year old, with SAD, Few hundred buck, lousy car stuck with 7 year installment and a no so fancy job. Even if i want to confess my love... how would any sane girl in this world will say yes? i know i wouldn't. haha... no matter how nice or how good i can treat her... without money... it just hopeless.
Look, whatever it is you predict or assume about any sane girl's feelings (or lack thereof) about YOU inevitably comes true. Why? Because you believe it and therefore, that unfortunate truth becomes reality. If you alter your thinking to that which you want to achieve: love, happiness, your dreamjob, a girl who will love you back and will want to marry you, chances are you will GET it because you will MAKE it happen.

No one is more misunderstood than the one who refuses to understand.
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Old 12-23-2011  
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Default Re: Why do love-shy men NOT want to show they like/love a woman?

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Originally Posted by thesmallestloser View Post
Maybe because, EVEN if i manage to have reasonable conversation with, EVEN if i know she "likes" me - i just "KNOW" that i'll "drop the ball" when it comes to flirting, showing my interest, & asking her out (ie my true nerves/inexperience will surface, & she will reject me accordingly). And i just CANNOT TAKE any frustrations/rejection in this area. My self-worth cannot handle it, and it is just plain UNNECESSARY stress/suffering. Its not worth the risk.
We all know that taking risks involves failing and succeeding. You can not take any frustrations/rejections if you don't make any efforts at all... but then you have to realise that you will NEVER find success in that area of your life because you're afraid of rejection. Every guy who has faced frustration/rejection once up to a million times in their experiences with girls ultimately ends up succeeding, therefore, WINNING the girl he LOVES and ends up happy.

If that is not your dream, if that is not your goal, you will not achieve it--that's the reality of it. If you choose not to take those risks, then there you have it: the result of your choice didn't give you a gold ticket.

No one is more misunderstood than the one who refuses to understand.
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Old 12-23-2011  
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Default Re: Why do love-shy men NOT want to show they like/love a woman?

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Originally Posted by Metal_isthe_Answer View Post
In my experience its that you tell someone youre interested and theyre not, theres an awkwardness filling the air each time you see this person, they know youre attracted to them, and you know they dont care. Better imo to say nothing and let it go away
I know how hard it can be once the awkwardness starts to sink in after being found out that you like them but now I learned that you can make a choice to get rid of the awkwardness by pretending that you're meeting them for the first time. I did that and after receiving no reaction at all, it didn't feel so awkward anymore.

No one is more misunderstood than the one who refuses to understand.
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Old 12-23-2011  
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Default Re: Why do love-shy men NOT want to show they like/love a woman?

Hey... what about love-shy girls? Do we count? =/
It's quite simply, in my case, an intense fear of rejection. So intense, in fact, that I will (reluctantly) reject a guy that I like for fear that he will reject me in the future. I can't understand why any man would like me anyway. It always perplexes me if someone asks me out, to point where I think they have a warped perspective or ulterior motives. I think I have the same fear as love-shy men, it just manifests its self differently. Or something.

I'll stop talking now.

Girls that glitter love the dark.

"They make it looks so easy, connecting with another human being. It's like no one told them it's the hardest thing in the world." - DEXTER

learn to bloom by =agnes-cecile
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Old 12-23-2011  
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Default Re: Why do love-shy men NOT want to show they like/love a woman?

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Originally Posted by Flowers-Of-Bloom View Post
It always perplexes me if someone asks me out, to point where I think they have a warped perspective or ulterior motives.
I'm very sorry to hear that, but I feel the same.

I haven't been diagnosed with love-shyness, but I feel I do have some kind of it. My friend refuses to believe it exists, which makes me upset.

With girls I find attractive, I will certainly never show that I like them. I think it's because that if they reciprocate, I won't be prepared and I won't know what to do. It sucks.
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